


Accidentally in love

by Dancingdog



Series: Accidentally in love [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dean is Bad at Feelings, Flocks, Fluff, Gabriel just wants a family, Grace Bonds, M/M, Mating, Multi, No Wincest, Plot, Self-Worth Issues, Threesome, sort of, soul bonds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-28
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-11 14:18:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 84,945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7895908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dancingdog/pseuds/Dancingdog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Metatron's failed attempt to trick Castiel using a duplicate of Gabriel, the real Gabriel crawls his way back to life and (begrudgingly) joins Team Free Will's efforts to save the world from Metatron, Rowena, The Darkness and anything else that gets thrown at them.</p><p>But after what should have been a simple demon nest bust turns into a hive of ninety-seven terrified black-eyed monsters doing all they can to kill the little group, Gabriel and Cas take extreme measures to ensure all their safeties. </p><p>Except, it somehow mates them all together, and such intimate bonds aren't so easily broken, even when the four of them aren't in any way romantically involved.</p><p>  <em>Yet.</em></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

A couple of months after Metatron had used a copy of Gabriel to trick Castiel, the real Gabriel appeared at the Bunker's doorstep.

He looked weak and damaged and maybe a little (a lot) wary of whose company he was in, but he had nowhere else to go now that he was practically human, so Team Free Will had reluctantly let him in.

Castiel watched as Gabriel collapsed onto the couch and toyed with his blade warningly in case his brother decided to try anything, and Gabriel glared at him, spread his arms and growled.

"If you're going to take a leaf out of Lucifer's books, go right ahead, brother."

Cas had put his blade away, though he didn't trust Gabriel around the Winchesters.

A week passed and with no explanation as to Gabriel's current state of both almost human and alive, Team Free Will started to get irritated.

They'd cut him this much slack so far because he'd sacrificed himself to save Kali and attempted to help stop the apocalypse, but the fact remained that Gabriel was still a Trickster and had killed Dean over a hundred times all to make the brothers say _'yes'_ to Michael and Lucifer. Who was to say he wouldn't try it again?

Then there was the whole TV land incident and Castiel hadn't been partial to being kept away from his charges for so long whilst being snapped to who-knows-where with his mouth taped and hands bound, as Gabriel performed unspeakable acts upon the Winchester brothers involving herpes and Japanese game shows.

So Team Free Will cornered Gabriel and demanded he give them answers and archly, Gabriel did.

It turned out that Metatron had used a tiny slither of Gabriel's grace to erect his duplicate (which should have been impossible considering Gabriel's death had caused him to be thrust into The Void, where all dead angels ended up, but Metatron seemed to be able to bend a lot of rules using the Angel Tablet), and when the duplicate had vanished at Cas' discovery of it all being a ruse, the fragment of grace hadn't returned to The Void.

So Gabriel had been both alive and dead at the same time, thus providing an answer to Schrödinger's experiments (too bad the scientist had died a few decades ago) and the part of him that was alive had just enough energy to rebuild his vessel, before he promptly passed out from the strain on what little grace was left.

When he had awoken three days later, frozen, starving and in desperate need of a toilet, a tiny part of his grace from The Void had worked its way back to Earth and had merged with the original slither.

It gave him enough energy to walk a mile into civilisation to eat, warm up and relieve his bladder.

Then he'd passed out again from exhaustion.

He'd awoken a little quicker the next time, and after having spent two days slumped over a gas station toilet, he realised another tiny fragment of his grace had wormed its way back from The Void.

It was enough to keep his heart pumping and his body temperature stable.

This cycle repeated for two weeks until he managed to stumble across the Bunker; suggested to him sympathetically by a timid-looking man with a scruffy beard, nervous voice and a name tag pinned lopsidedly to his jacket with the words _'Mr. Shurley'_ penned onto it.

He thanked the stranger and missed his pleased smile as he turned his back, and the timid man disappeared without any traces of him having been there at all.

The Winchesters had scrunched their noses up at the extravagant story as Castiel narrowed his eyes at his brother, but with no other explanation, Team Free Will had had no choice but to accept it as true.

"If I'd have known you guys lived here I would never have come in the first place," Gabriel had snapped, not fond of the idea of sticking with the two most wanted humans in Heaven, Hell and everything in between, as well as staying under the same roof as one of his brothers, who all seemed to want to kill each other these days.

He'd left Heaven because he couldn't stand two of his brothers fighting, and now, all of his siblings were tearing at one another with blades. He didn't trust Castiel any more than the younger angel trusted him.

He'd told the Bunker's residents that the second he procured even a fifth of his grace, he would be out of their hair for good.

Everyone had been ecstatic at the good news.

Except, it took a lot longer than Gabriel had expected to gain even a fraction of what his grace once was and days at the Bunker rolled into weeks, with nobody trusting anybody until Gabriel noticed something strange on Dean's arm.

He had been furious upon learning that Dean was stupid enough to have the Mark of Cain transferred unto him and told the trio as much, before he began to notice other things, such as Castiel's weakened state, which up until then, he hadn't realised had been caused by Heaven being closed for business to humans and angels alike.

It suddenly made sense why his own grace wasn't charging as fast as it should have.

So instead of acting hostile towards the three who had taken him in (begrudgingly, mind you), he began to listen and observe as he waited for The Void to release the remainder of his grace, and to Team Free Will's utter shock, slowly but surely he began to help.

He aided Sam and Dean's research into the Mark of Cain, providing them with information that Castiel and the library couldn't and he helped them with their cases every so often, when they were particularly stumped or at risk.

It took him longer to associate himself with Castiel and the angels who followed him, but after a couple of months of helping the Winchesters, he turned his attention to Cas' cause.

He offered titbits of information when Castiel was looking particularly haggard or lost, and although he refused to reveal himself to his other brothers and sisters in Castiel's 'base of operations', the younger angel eventually came to Gabriel when he needed aid.

Gabriel began to accept his role as 'knowledge giver'; it was a fair trade for using the Bunker as shelter and for food. His grace was healing nicely and no angel, demon or demigod had come searching for him; Team Free Will had stuck to their word about keeping his existence a secret.

Then Dean got worse. More aggressive. The Mark of Cain was making him extremely violent and Sam and Cas had no idea what to do, so in desperation and as a last resort, they turned to Gabriel in hopes that the strength and wisdom of an archangel would be able to fix the problem.

Except Gabriel didn't even have enough grace to fly, let alone fix an ancient soul-deep curse and he had been just as helpless as the others.

He tried though, because Sam, Dean and Cas had kept him safe despite their protests towards his presence, and they hadn't harmed him when he was so vulnerable despite everything he'd done to them in the past. He scoured books and the internet, Men of Letters' records and anything else he could get his hands on, but there was nothing to break the curse.

And then Dean had become a demon.

At first, none of them knew, but then Sam had become really jumpy and narrow-minded, even though his brother had just died and Gabriel had asked what was wrong a few times but Sam still didn't fully trust the archangel and had refused to tell him.

Then, some time later, Cas had come storming into the Bunker whilst Sam was out and as Gabriel was searching for something to eat to cure his seemingly never-ending human hunger, Castiel pinned him to the kitchen counter and snarled at him, asking if he knew anything about Dean's condition and if so, why hadn't he informed Castiel.

Gabriel had scowled and attempted to shove his brother off him (which was too easy considering Castiel was supposed to have all his powers) and snapped that he didn't have a clue what his brother was talking about.

When he learned about Dean's resurrection as a demon, he admitted defeat and promised Cas he would do whatever he could to aid Dean's transformation back into a human. He wasn't partial to being chased after by Hell's workers, so it seemed an obvious decision.

So when the big showdown finally happened, Gabriel managed to keep Dean distracted from killing Sam long enough for Cas to show up and change his soul back.

Then Gabriel had learned that his little brother was using another angel's grace to keep himself going and he was disgusted and horrified and outraged all at once.

He told Castiel as much, but when the younger angel had explained all that had happened to lead to that point, Gabriel was loathe to admit he felt a stab of sympathy for his brother and he nodded his head and let Cas continue whatever he was doing with Hannah.

Weeks passed and things seemed to simmer down after that. Gabriel's strength was very slowly returning to him and the Winchesters carried on hunting as Castiel and Hannah (who Gabriel vaguely remembered as a youngling in Heaven and had always seen her as a little underhanded - not that he'd tell Castiel that) continued to track down rogue angels.

There was also something about a red-haired witch, but Gabriel didn't particularly care about humans playing games with magic and he focused on retrieving all his grace.

He continued to help when he was needed and the four settled into a routine with one another. Gabriel was just glad it kept him from being bored.

Then Dean took another turn for the worse and ended up slaughtering a lot of people (bad people, but still _people_ ) and Castiel asked for an audience with Metatron, which Gabriel had misgivings about.

Then Metatron asked them to work with Crowley, which Gabriel had more doubts about, but refused to voice them as he was only going to be staying with them until he got a fifth of his grace back and was able to return into his personal Witness Protection Programme.

Crowley refused to hand over the First Blade because of the same witch from earlier and then another red-head joined the team.

Charlie.

Gabriel loved her. She was smart, funny and nerdy and the pair got along like a house on fire. 

For the first time ever, Sam and Dean smiled at him in a way that wasn't distrusting or ill-untoward and Gabriel found himself sharing an amiable conversation with the two Winchesters when Charlie was involved. It was the first time they'd been anything but irritated with one another.

Gabriel began to help out more during research, willingly offering information rather than waiting for the Winchesters to demand it from him and the brothers began to thank him sheepishly.

He was still unsure about Catiel; he didn't know what the other angel's intentions were in terms of killing other angels and he wasn't prepared to allow Castiel close enough to disappoint him; he'd done that with the other archangels, his closest brothers, and look where it had got him.

More weeks passed and somewhere along the way, Cain died and the Winchesters proved their loyalty and utter trust towards Castiel by giving him the First Blade. Gabriel began to wonder if his fears of Castiel were unfounded.

He gingerly opened up to his little brother, offering aid when needed and Castiel cautiously began to trust his older brother, even revealing his plan to ask Metatron for more information about the Mark of Cain. 

He told Gabriel how Hannah barred his entry to Heaven and how he was desperate to rescue Dean and Gabriel saw a devotion and love for these two humans in Cas' eyes and grace that he hadn't seen in any of his siblings for a very long time; towards humans nor towards one another, and he made his mind up to go along with Castiel and Sam's plan to break Metatron out of Heaven's jail.

He kept Dean from finding out abound the pair's plan to rid him of the curse.

Nobody but Gabriel knew when he'd restored a fifth of his grace; enough for his wings to work at least, but he found himself unwilling to leave just then with Dean in such trouble and Cas still weak from his burning out grace.

He told himself he would stay a little longer, until the trio had sorted their problems. 

About the same time Cas recovered his stolen grace (minus the wings), the Book of the Damned turned up.

Gabriel advised the Winchesters to find it, before informing Sam and Castiel privately that it might be the only way to remove the Mark from Dean completely. Then Castiel informed Sam and Gabriel that Metatron had escaped with the Demon Tablet, and although Gabriel was disturbed by the thought, he couldn't find it in himself to blame his little brother after working so hard to rescue Dean.

Then they had all been reunited with Charlie and Gabriel had his awesome friend back, which the other three found highly amusing. Gabriel was more relaxed around Charlie, protective around her and the human thought his vast knowledge of everything in the Universe was awe inspiring. Gabriel liked to tell her stories of his adventures, just like he had once done with his younger siblings, and Castiel had this look of sorrow and longing whenever he caught the pair in this situation; one that made a sharp stab of pain strike Gabriel's grace.

Then the witch, Rowena, showed up again and Gabriel began to grow suspicious of her, but his thoughts all flew out of the window upon learning that Castiel had a child.

He didn't stop teasing Cas about it for weeks, and although his younger brother pretended to be annoyed, he swore he saw a spark of amusement in his sapphire eyes.

Then Charlie was murdered.

And Gabriel was _furious._

It was the first time he properly ventured out of the Bunker in all his glory. Someone had to pay for Charlie's undignified death.

He followed Dean in tracking down the Stynes and together they tore into the family, but even Gabriel could tell all was not well with Dean and now he'd he'd gained enough energy to fly, he vanished from Dean's side to warn Castiel and Sam of his findings.

After explaining their plan to rid Dean of the Mark using Rowena and Charlie's notes on the Book of the Damned, Castiel left Gabriel and Sam with the witch to corner Dean.

They later found Castiel beaten and bloodied, crumpled on the floor of the Bunker's library, Dean nowhere in sight.

For the first time in too long, Gabriel felt anguish at seeing one of his brothers so hurt, rather than the anger and numbness that usually came to mind.

He healed Castiel gently with his grace, now three fifths back to what it should've been with Heaven's borders open.

Castiel was shocked at realising Gabriel had chosen to stay with them after his grace had been replenished, but Gabriel had shrugged.

"Someone has to put you back together," he huffed, trying to seem indifferent as he carefully reset his brother's wings and Castiel had been so overwhelmed after so many of their siblings turning against him that he had tugged Gabriel into a grateful hug, despite Sam still being in the room. 

Gabriel had gingerly hugged back, something in his grace flaring warm and bright at finally being in contact with an angel who wasn't inclined to kill him, after going so long without that feeling of another's grace close to his own, and he maybe held onto Cas a little tighter than he should have.

Even Sam seemed a little more relaxed around Gabriel after that and the three focused their attention on saving Dean.

Things had gone wrong pretty quickly after that.

Dean believed he and Sam had to kill themselves to save the world, then Sam accepted it too, somehow Death died, and Castiel, Crowley and Rowena worked together to rid Dean of the Mark. Which were all mind-bogglingly awful things in themselves, but then Rowena escaped and cursed Castiel with a spell that fried his brain and made him attack Crowley and, _oh yeah,_ The Darkness; an ancient evil the archangels had kept locked away for millennia because of its ability to destroy the entire Universe with a single thought, was released upon the Earth.

But nobody knew what form it would take or where it would go, so Sam and Dean had had no choice but to retreat to the Bunker to think what to do next.

Castiel fled after his thoughts turned violent from the spell and nobody was quite sure where he went until his desperate plea for help was broadcast over angel radio.

Gabriel had zipped off to his location only to find Hannah dead alongside two other angels holding their blades, whilst Castiel cowered in the corner, blood leaking from his eyes and body trembling in an attempt to control his aggressive urges.

Gabriel gathered his little brother into his arms, grace clenching in pain at seeing the younger angel so broken and he flew them both back to the Bunker, to safety.

He gently pulsed his grace into Castiel's being, attempting to lift the curse Rowena had placed upon him, but there was some really dark magic at work and he wasn't able to get rid of all of it, meaning they needed to find the surprisingly powerful witch to cure Castiel.

Castiel whimpered and wriggled closer to Gabriel, distressed as he told him about Hannah's trick to get information from him and Gabriel poured soothing and comfort into Cas' being, enraged at all his little brother had suffered and for the first time, Castiel glanced at him with respect and awe as an echo of the magnificent archangel he used to be slipped through his grace.

At one time, all Gabriel's younger siblings used to look upon him like that and he subconsciously tugged Castiel a little closer as he healed him, like any protective big brother would at seeing their younger sibling hurt.

He was rewarded with Castiel relaxing against him, closing his eyes contentedly and a little part of Gabriel that had been broken after seeing so many of his brothers and sisters mauling each other, cautiously repaired itself.

Even Sam and Dean seemed intent on lavishing Cas with attention to make sure he didn't get abused again. They wrapped him up in blankets and fed him hot chocolate and other warming drinks as they squeezed his shoulders comfortingly and Gabriel tilted his head at how much these humans obviously cared for the young angel. He'd never considered the rough hunters shaped to be his own brothers' vessels could show such tenderness towards anything or anyone. 

It gave him a lot to think about.

They eventually found Rowena and demanded she cure Castiel, and she did, but not before the spell made Cas take a few brutal swings at Dean.

Gabriel was quick to heal Dean, even if the older Winchester insisted he deserved it for hurting Cas previously, but Gabriel couldn't stand seeing anyone else bruised and bloodied and he ignored Dean's protests. Both Winchesters looked upon him with a small amount of respect and gratefulness behind their eyes.

Crowley went unheard from and nobody cared to look for him after the disaster that was The Darkness, and besides; as long as the demons were quiet, what did it matter?

So once again, Team Free Will were left to continue with their regular hunting, only this time, an almost fully-charged Gabriel seemed wholly willing to aid them, both with research and on the field.

After three months, one lazy evening when Dean was stretched out on the couch, Castiel reading quietly with Sam as Gabriel flicked pieces of popcorn into his mouth whilst Doctor Sexy blared through the TV, Dean cocked an eyebrow.

"Weren't you supposed to leave?" He asked mildly, not actually looking at Gabriel and the archangel shrugged.

"Probably."

"Huh," said Dean, not seeming too concerned and that was the end of it. Nobody ever brought it up again; everyone refused to mention that Gabriel had been with them for approximately a year and a half now, despite originally stating he was going to leave the second he retained a fifth of his grace.

Now he was at five sixths of full power and couldn't actually see a reason to leave his new home.

_Home._

It sounded odd. He'd never had a singular place he could return to at the end of a day (or whatever time period he'd been absent for) and feel safe and appreciated. Not for a long while, anyway.

He startled at that too, because it was true that Team Free Will really _did_ appreciate his help. They'd come to depend on him and they expected him to be there when they returned, just like he'd come to rely on them. He even found himself caring what happened to them on hunts and he often found himself getting anxious or stressed whenever any one of them were injured and he hadn't been quick enough to protect them.

He realised he was starting to treat them like how he'd treated his younger siblings back when they were all one big, happy family in Heaven.

Dean and Sam didn't seem to mind all that much, passing it off as an 'Angel Thing' and Castiel seemed to actively enjoy being coddled by his older brother. Gabriel believed it was because Cas also remembered how all the archangels had once been like and how they'd acted around their siblings. Angel hierarchy was still engrained deeply into all their programmings.

Gabriel just liked having a brother that wasn't blinded by orders. Both angels were relieved at finding one of their kind that wasn't out to murder them.

It wasn't just Cas he'd grown closer to either; Gabriel actually enjoyed being around the Winchesters. They were a little bit damaged like he was, but their hearts were in the right place and family meant everything to them. He realised that Cas was part of their family and sometimes he found himself wondering what it would be like if he was, too.

Still, it was enough to have them as his friends (and when had that happened?) and just like he had done with Charlie, he now told Sam stories of his adventures; the younger Winchester's face lighting up in interest and curiosity as Gabriel filled his mind with knowledge.

He pulled pranks on Dean (you couldn't take the _'Trick'_ out of _'Trickster'_ ) and although the older human pretended to be annoyed, he and Gabriel had already been involved in their fair share of prank wars. Dean also happened to love Gabriel's desserts and the archangel had a feeling he had been forgiven for a lot of things because of his pies alone.

Gabriel missed having a family.

Maybe one day, the civil war amongst angels would be over and they could all go back to being what they once were to one another. The thought made Gabriel's grace ache.

One incredibly dull morning, where the sun couldn't even be bothered to lift above the clouds, and the air was cool and windy, Team Free Will got a lead on a nest of demons possessing a small town.

When they arrived, they realised _'nest'_ was an understatement; it was more like a _hive_.

The town was full of them; doctors, nurses, mechanics, shopkeepers and children all had black eyes that glinted with fear.

And then they saw the two hunters and two angels and they _swarmed_.

The Winchesters were easily subdued, thrown half way across the abandoned warehouse the demons had trapped them in (why were they always abandoned warehouses?) and leapt upon by at least five demons.

The demons were more cautious about approaching Castiel and Gabriel, but the sheer number of them was enough to seriously wound the two angels (and just how had these demons come into possession of four angel blades?) and back them into a corner.

The demons seemed frantic, terrified even, and not of their opponents.

"We're not being fed to that thing!" Hissed one as it slashed at Castiel's shoulder with an angel blade.

The younger angel grunted in pain as he dislodged his attacker, only for three more to take its place. There must have been around thirty demons in the room, with more outside.

Both angels heard Sam cry out in agony as his arm was snapped and Dean called out desperately to his brother, before his voice cut off as a demon drove a knife through his leg.

"You're not taking us back to Crowley!" One demon shouted at Dean, horror and fear in her gaze as the demons around her winced.

As Sam let out another keen of pain, Gabriel prodded his brother's mind telepathically and Castiel nodded determinedly as he kicked a demon in the stomach.

_'Close your eyes,'_ said Gabriel's voice in both Winchesters' minds and the pair immediately obeyed.

Then Gabriel and Castiel unleashed their graces upon the entire town, wiping out every demon present.

The light was blinding and pure, and it burned through every demon like a flame on paper. There were agonised screams erupting all around as ninety-seven demons disintegrated on the spot. Sam and Dean's voices would've been amongst the screams of terror and torment if it hadn't been for Gabriel and Castiel using a tiny part of their graces to shield the humans' souls from the blast.

But there were more demons than both angels had anticipated and eliminating them all in a single burst put a strain on their graces to the point where when they'd finished and every demon was dead, the pair keeled over in exhaustion.

Castiel took a little longer to wake than his brother due to him being less powerful than the archangel, but when he finally regained his senses he noticed two things:

1) There was something different about his grace; something... more _whole._

2) Sam and Dean were lying unmoving as Gabriel hovered worriedly over them.

Castiel scrambled to his feet and staggered over to them, dread budding inside him.

_Fearguiltpanicconcern_

"They're not responding," murmured Gabriel, a note of uneasiness creeping into his tone.

Castiel checked their pulses through habit from being human despite being able to see their organs if he so chose.

"They're still alive, just unconscious," said Castiel. "I think our graces knocked them out."

_Guiltshameapologyrelief_

"It was a big blast," muttered Gabriel, a crease between his brows.

_Painpainpainconfusionpain_

Dean groaned. "What happened?" He grated out as he rubbed at his head.

_Reliefreliefreliefsympathyapology_

"You took a nap whilst we dealt with the bad guys," winked Gabriel as he made to help the older Winchester sit up.

Dean huffed just as Sam groaned.

_Painpainagonyagonyconfusionworryagony_

"Am I dead?" Sam grumbled and Dean rolled his eyes.

_Reliefexasperationworryrelief_

"If you were, I'm sure you wouldn't stay dead for long with our record."

"Pity," huffed Sam as he attempted to sit up only to bite his tongue.

_Agonyagonytortureagony_

"I think my arm's broken," he hissed through clenched teeth.

Gabriel leaned forward and with a lot of concentration after such a big use of his grace, slowly healed Sam's arm.

"Better?"

_Reliefgratefulnessappreciationrelief_

"Much," breathed Sam, Dean and Castiel in unison, before staring at one another in surprise.

Gabriel cocked an eyebrow.

"So you guys can feel it too?"

Dean looked uncomfortable. "I thought it was an after-effect of being knocked out from angel mojo."

Sam's eyes were wide. "Wait, so you guys have been feeling all... _that,_ too? All those... emotions?"

Castiel stiffened. "My grace felt off when I awoke." He glanced at Sam and Dean. "The pair of you should _not_ have blacked out during the blast."

_Worrypanicconfusiondoubt_

Both Winchesters looked highly disturbed at the last round of emotions that hit their minds and souls; emotions that weren't theirs alone but showed on the faces of the other three and Cas paused as Gabriel grimaced.

"I think we have a problem."


	2. Chapter 2

"What do you mean _'mated'_?" Hissed Dean, and if he were a dog, his hackles would've been raised as far as they could go.

Castiel winced at the onslaught of anger and accusation pummelling at his grace from Dean's distressed soul.

"We mean when we were busy saving your hides, we somehow ended up not only protecting your souls, but bonding to them too," huffed Gabriel irritatedly, arms crossed over his chest and gaze narrowed.

Dean rounded on him.

"You saying you _accidentally_ formed an irreversible bond with us that usually only happens when angels are getting it on with each other?" 

Gabriel clenched his fists and Dean grimaced at the sheer amount of fury radiating from the archangel's grace.

"No, I'm saying we _accidentally_ formed multiple _almost_ -irreversible bonds with you two knuckleheads, which usually only happens when the beings in question care deeply for one another," he seethed.

Dean looked even more disturbed by this.

"You did _not_ just confess your big, gay love for us," he growled and Gabriel's eyes flashed gold in silent outrage.

A mating bond between angels was sacred; very few formed one and the bonds didn't have to be romantic. They could be a great show of trust and affection, or loyalty and friendship and all parties had to be willing to take part.

Yet here was Dean, speaking about these bonds as though they were just an inconvenience; a burden or even something to be disgusted and repulsed by.

Gabriel had taken part in bonding before and it was glorious whilst it had lasted; soothing and comforting and protective in all the ways he'd craved. Then the bonds had shattered painfully due to reasons Gabriel didn't wish to contemplate right then.

"Shut up, Dean," murmured Sam, noting the archangel's expression and Dean snorted.

"How are you not freaked out about this?"

Sam scowled at him. "I am. But I doubt a 'mating bond' puts us at risk of death and I'm sure Gabe and Cas are just as horrified being tied to us as we are at finding out this type of thing actually exists. So don't take your anger out on them; it was an accident and I'm sure we'll find a way to fix it."

An odd look crossed Castiel's face before it was gone as quickly as it appeared. Gabriel decided to ignore it.

"I knew there was a reason I liked you best," the archangel muttered drily and Dean shot him a dirty glare.

"If you think just because we're mated to you means you can force us to star in your dirty little fantasies then we've got news for you, Gabriel."

_Offensehurtrejectionangerfury_

"You didn't honestly just accuse me of wanting to rape you, did you?" Spat Gabriel and Dean briefly averted his gaze, ashamed.

"Enough," commanded Castiel as Gabriel looked ready to tear into the older Winchester. "I understand this is a stressful time for us all, but we mustn't fight with one another; it won't achieve anything." He eyed Gabriel.

"I have never partaken in a bond. Is there anything we need to know before we attempt to find a way to break them?"

Gabriel heard the cautiousness behind the words, as though at any moment he would flip. He swallowed down the urge to snap at his brother.

"The bonds were created by us briefly losing control of our graces because we were caught off guard by the number of demons in that town. The parts of our graces shielding Sam and Dean's souls must have collapsed inwards for a second and merged with them. That's probably why they blacked out; they didn't expect our graces to leap at their souls, which means the bonds will strengthen just by us being in one another's presence. 

"They'll also strengthen by using them, so the more emotion we keep shoving down them, the thicker the bonds become. Preventing that is going to be tricky though, because the three of you won't exactly know what it is you're looking for at first when you try to close your end of the bonds, so I assume there'll just be a ton of emotions passing between you all."

"But you'll be able to close your ends?" Huffed Dean accusingly and Sam elbowed his brother sharply.

Gabriel narrowed his gaze.

"Every bond is different. It is based upon the emotions and feelings between the two people that share it. Your bond with me will be completely different to the one you share with Sam and as such, it'll take me a little while to relearn how to control my ends of the bonds."

Dean looked perturbed. "Please never talk about me and Sam sharing a mating bond ever again."

Gabriel rolled his eyes in unison with Sam.

"Did you actually possess the ability to act like an adult at any point in your life?" Murmured Sam and Dean scowled.

Gabriel cut him off before he got a chance to reply.

"Bonds like these are extremely sacred for our kind. They are the ultimate sign of trust as no secrets can be kept between beings that share them, and they give way to the darkest, most vulnerable parts of yourself that you may not even know exist. As the links strengthen, more and more of you and who you are will be visible to the people you share the bonds with. You won't be able to hide from them."

At this point, Dean, Sam and Castiel all looked extremely uncomfortable, and maybe even a little scared at Gabriel's words. The archangel had to admit he himself wasn't feeling very confident.

"Can we expect any side effects?" Asked Castiel quietly as an almost sombre atmosphere fell around the room.

"Foreign emotions, then actual thoughts as the links get stronger. You may space out sometimes or even begin to feel the sensations that others are feeling, like pain or pleasure. The bonds may begin to change the way you think and perceive certain things," replied Gabriel. 

"Great, so once again we're gonna get brainwashed by angel mojo," quipped Dean, remembering their time with Zachariah.

Gabriel scrunched his nose up in irritation.

"You're not going to get _'brainwashed'_ by anything. I only meant the bonds will grant you a different perspective on things."

Dean crossed his arms but said nothing more.

"Different perspective?" Echoed Sam. "You mean, we'll be able to see how each other view certain situations?"

Gabriel nodded and Sam averted his gaze thoughtfully. Cas tilted his head.

"That doesn't sound too abhorrent."

"It's not meant to be," said Gabriel, a quirk to his lips. "It's meant to inspire greater understanding of one another; that's the whole point of a bond."

Castiel seemed to consider this and even Sam looked intrigued by the idea. Dean looked like he wanted to sleep for a week and forget any of it had ever happened.

"Can they be broken without killing us?" Grouched Dean and Gabriel was close to snapping the elder Winchester to another reality. The aversion to such an intimate connection grated on his nerves; especially when he remembered all he had shared with his previous mates.

Not that he'd ever expect Castiel, Sam and Dean to embrace that title. He was just glad they were his family. Friends. _Whatever._

"A cooperating witch should do the trick," Gabriel huffed. "Unless you're completely against them, too," he sniped, unable to help himself.

Dean narrowed a glare at him. "I can deal with a witch if it means I don't have to be _'soul-bonded'_ to three other guys; one of which is my brother."

"So if Cas and I were wearing female vessels...?"

"I don't want to hear about your experiences in _Casa Erotica._ "

"Scared I'll out-do you or something?"

"Oh please; at least I don't need to magic up the ladies that talk to me."

"You sure you want to break the bonds? You're already arguing like an old married couple," smirked Sam and he received two identical glares for his comment.

Castiel rolled his eyes.

"Instead of fighting, would it not be a better use of our time to attempt to locate someone who is adept at handling these sort of matters?"

Sam chuckled despite the strangeness of the situation.

"A person who knows about angels and is good at breaking rare bonds between them? Sounds easy."

Castiel lifted an eyebrow. "I would imagine it to be rather difficult."

The corner of Dean's lips twitched and Gabriel noted the fondness in his eyes. 

"Sammy's being sarcastic, man. C'mon. Let's... find a way to fix this mess."

Castiel nodded and Gabriel was surprised at the sudden drain in hostility from Dean's gaze as the Winchester brothers and Cas turned to leave the room.

"You coming?" Asked Sam, with a glance back to Gabriel and the archangel blinked before joining his friends.

They had a lot of phone books to get through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter but still important! Hope you like!


	3. Chapter 3

Dean threw the latest paper onto the table. They had been searching for a witch for two weeks now and so far the nine that they'd already visited either didn't believe in angels, much less knew how to break a bond between them, or attempted to curse them.

It was frustrating, especially when the bonds were so difficult to control. Add to that the revelation that Amara apparently ate souls and things were getting very complicated.

They were all getting distracted easily, not just on the couple of hunts they'd been forced to take on, but in everyday aspects of life too. Dean had lost count of how many times he'd scalded his hand when making a cup of coffee just because he'd zoned out at feeling Sam's irritation during research, or Castiel's curiosity with something he'd read.

It was becoming dangerous. They were all making fatal errors during hunts and it didn't look like they'd be able to control the bonds for a long time. Considering Amara was on the loose, none of it could end well.

It was late evening; around ten and with nothing else to do other than talk to the others (and Dean really wasn't feeling up to that after feeling their emotions all day) he decided to take a drive. Anywhere would do; he had no destination in mind. He may visit a bar if he passed one, but other than that he needed to get away from the bunker to clear his head.

When he had been driving for about twenty minutes, he felt the tension in his shoulders begin to drain away as he relaxed in the familiar setting of the Impala. He flexed his fingers on the wheel and leaned back more comfortably into the seat as he cranked up the volume on ACDC's _'You shook me all night long'._

The dim streetlights were soothing on his eyes and the monotony of the country road was enough to calm his distressed mind, and he felt the beginnings of a fond smile quirking his lips as he patted the dash.

"You always treat me right, baby," he chuckled to himself, voice warm and quiet.

_Excitementtriumphjoy_

The car swerved violently, grazing a nearby tree trunk and Dean cursed with it as he yanked the wheel back under control, pressing his brake a little too harshly until the seatbelt bit into his shoulder.

Dean fumbled for his phone and dialled Sam's number, a thick scowl resting on his features as he contemplated which to do first; ask his brother if he was okay, or demand to know what the sharp burst of emotions was about.

"What was that?" Snapped Dean into the receiver as his brother answered and it took a moment for Sam's sheepish voice to filter through.

"Sorry. Just found a witch who looks as though she could help us. She seems like one of those _inner chi_ people."

Dean rolled his eyes. "So she's crazy."

"Maybe, but she might be able to break the bonds or at the very least teach us how to control them."

"Great," huffed Dean as he slid out of the car to check the headlights from where he'd almost had a head-on collision with a tree. "We'll leave first thing tomorrow morning."

"Awesome." A pause. "Hey, are you okay? Where are you?"

"Out," grunted Dean as he squinted in the dark. Black paint looked great until nightfall. He swore when he saw the scuff marks on the wing.

"Dean, you're making us all worry with the... less-than pleasant feelings from your end. You sure everything's fine?"

There was a soft _"Is he alright?"_ presumably from Castiel because Gabriel wasn't that subtle.

"Everything's peachy," Dean grumbled as he slipped back into the driver's seat. Sam seemed ready to protest, especially with the way Dean's end of the bond was probably transmitting all sorts of annoyed and grumpy emotions, but the younger Winchester wisely kept his mouth shut.

"Sure. See you later."

Dean mumbled a noise that could be taken as a reply before hanging up and turning the car around, back en route to the Bunker.

 

* * *

 

The witch turned out to be just as clueless as the others (although she did attempt to offer Gabriel some goji berries to beat his chocolate addiction) and this only served to make Dean more irritable.

"Stupid witch. Almost crashed the car for this," he muttered under his breath and Sam winced at the strong blast of tumultuousness and petty spite radiating through the bond.

"Wanna cool it down, tiger?" Drawled Gabriel, but there was a hint of annoyance behind his words; obviously the angels were having as many difficulties with the bonds as the humans were.

"Deal with it," snapped Dean. "I have to put up with your emotions, so you can put up with mine."

"You've been on your period all day and most of last night," retorted Gabriel without missing a beat. "Can't you give us at least a bit of a rest until the next cycle?"

_Angeroffenseanger_

"Can it, Gabriel. We wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for you."

The archangel narrowed his gaze, ignoring the fact that it was partly Casitel's fault as well. "It was an accident. How many times do I have to apologise?"

"I'll let you know when you get close," huffed out Dean.

Gabriel snapped his fingers and the car came to a dead halt. Dean tried to floor the gas, but there was no response.

Sam and Castiel winced at another intense burst of emotion from Dean, but Gabriel glared at the older Winchester.

"It's hard on all of us, Dean. None of us know how to manipulate these things. Don't make it any harder," he said lowly, warningly and Sam eyed his brother warily, begging him not to be stupid enough to challenge an archangel to a fight.

Dean's reply was bitter and wholly unfair.

"We wouldn't have to manipulate them if you'd have left like you were supposed to."

_Hurtrejectionhurtfury_

Sam glared at his brother as Gabriel stiffened.

"Are you serious?" Sam hissed. "After everything he's done?"

"Like trap us in TV land? Try to make us into his brothers' puppets? Send Cas off to who knows where with his hands and mouth bound?" Dean bit out and this time Dean's anger paled in comparison to the outrage and disbelief radiating from Sam.

Gabriel looked ready to fly, but Castiel grabbed his arm to hold him back.

"What is your problem?" Spat Sam. "We're all new to this! You're acting like you did when you had the Mark on your arm. Gabriel's our friend, not your personal punching bag!"

Suddenly, Dean deflated and he rubbed tiredly at the bridge of his nose.

"...I don't know what's wrong with me. I thought it was the bonds influencing my thoughts, but I just..." He trailed off and Sam's face softened slightly.

"Do you think maybe the residual energy from the Mark-?"

Dean shook his head, cutting Sam off. "It's nothing like that. I... I've never been very good at feelings, so having to cope with three other people's is probably making me a little cranky." He sighed. " _A lot_ cranky," he amended before turning to glance at Gabriel.

"Sorry, Gabe. I don't mean any of that stuff I said. I was out of line. I don't want you to leave."

The archangel cocked a surprised eyebrow.

"...Don't worry about it," he said cautiously before tilting his head in a manner he'd obviously learned from Castiel. "Maybe there is something else at work here. Something from the First Blade or the Mark that we've missed? We could take a look if you like?" He offered, but Dean shook his head with a small smile.

"Nah. I'm just a hot-headed jerk who doesn't know how to talk to people. I need to learn to be a little more patient with this whole 'bonding' thing."

Gabriel nodded slowly. "I guess I should cut you some slack too. Angels are created knowing about these things even if we can't control them. Humans don't have that luxury."

Dean smiled lopsidedly. "Truce?"

The archangel smirked amusedly. "Sure."

There was a faint aura of apology coming from Dean, and Sam and Cas felt themselves relax as they detected a hint of forgiveness from Gabriel. Dean exhaled the tension from his frame and when he tried the accelerator this time, he was rewarded with baby's engine purring back to life.

"Home, Jeeves," grinned Gabriel as he shoved a lollipop between his lips and Sam felt himself smile in relief as Dean snorted and did as instructed.

 

* * *

 

Unfortunately, this wasn't a fairy tale and everything didn't magically get better just because they'd all had a little heart-to-heart in the Impala.

The bonds continued to irritate them all in very different ways. Castiel, for example, had always struggled with certain human concepts such as personal space and the like. He had thought that being connected to two humans would maybe improve his understanding of such aspects of humanity, but if anything, it just blurred the lines further.

They'd been mated for three weeks now and Castiel found himself being more tactile with his brother and the Winchesters in a way he had never really noticed in himself before. When he and Sam were researching, he noticed he had begun to lightly touch his hand to the younger Winchester's shoulder as he leaned over him to read something. 

Although the act never seemed to bother Sam (if he had even noticed), it concerned Cas that this simple touch was more of a need to be close to his 'mate' than a subconscious decision to support himself on something.

Then there were the times where Dean would offer him a friendly pat on the back, or a reassuring squeeze to his shoulder (and _they_ seemed to be getting more frequent as well) and he would find himself desiring to lean into the touch, his mind once again demanding he be near his 'mate'.

He wondered if this side effect of the bond affected the angels more acutely than the humans because he had noticed Gabriel acting similarly, despite his cocky bravado. Once or twice he had even caught himself zoning out to focus on the familiar aura of Gabriel's grace, desperate to feel another angel's grace in contact with his own after going so long without. It was hard being despised by all of Heaven when that's all you had ever known.

However, when he'd felt Gabriel's curious grace worm a little closer, craving all the same sensations he was, he'd snapped himself firmly back to reality, grimacing when he felt the link between them strengthen just a little bit.

It was one thing to be in a mating bond with people who were unwilling, but to touch their being, the deepest part of themselves (even if that person was Cas' brother) would take things a step too far into inappropriate. Gabriel seemed to realise this as well because his face went blank as soon as he felt Cas' grace retreat and he quickly continued with whatever he was doing before they'd focused on one another, albeit a little stiffly.

Cas didn't like not being in control of his own desires and actions, but the bond was altering his thoughts ever-so-slightly in a way he wasn't appreciative of.

At one point, he'd lightly touched Dean's shoulder during research, in exactly the same way he had done countless times with Sam over the past three weeks, but unlike his brother, Dean had tensed under Cas' hand and leaned away. It was only when he realised he was slowly leaking affection and a need to be closer to the human through the bond, that he took a step backwards in mortification.

He glanced to the younger Winchester. Had he been doing that with Sam too? Was Sam just too polite to say (or do) anything? Or were the bonds becoming stronger? They may not have wanted their connections to grow, but it didn't mean they wouldn't. After all, they were struggling to put a lid on their emotions and with all this tactile business, it was only logical that their bonds would thicken. 

He cared deeply for his brother and the Winchesters, just as he knew them to care for him, and of course he hadn't missed their subtle gestures of fondness and friendship for him in the past; back pats, arm squeezes, shoulder touches - all general forms of contact between friends and brothers. However these new gestures were distinct from the others; more meaningful and intense in a way they had no right to be.

Castiel was starting to grow concerned that the bonds would strain all their friendships.

 

* * *

 

Gabriel had far more difficulties trying to close his ends of the bonds than he had initially expected. In fact, so far he hadn't managed to achieve the feat at all. It was getting ridiculous; he had been an expert at manipulating his previous bonds and they had been with far more powerful beings than Sam and Dean, and even Cas.

So why was controlling these bonds proving so hard?

He cared for the others, but he wasn't seeking anything beyond friendship with them. Someone to keep him company; keep him distracted from the terrible pains of his past, the people he'd lost. He needed someone to show him that he wasn't worthless; a burden. He wanted a family.

Gabriel shook his head to clear it. He was doing that thing again where his thoughts grew depressing and pessimistic. That wasn't who he wanted to be and besides, there were other problems he should have been focusing on.

Like breaking these current bonds.

Dean had quite vocally stated he wasn't willing to partake in the links, and despite his initial fury at the older Winchester's disgust with the sacred connections, Gabriel had to confess he understood. Bonds like this were incredibly intimate and revealing and to most beings, the prospect of leaving oneself so open and vulnerable was terrifying and required an unbelievable amount of trust.

Gabriel had once trusted three beings like that and he had paid a hefty price for it. 

That had been when he was undamaged and completely happy and had had no reason to believe their bonds would fail; it was almost an insult to share these new connections when there were so many secrets and reservations between them all.

Yet he couldn't deny the way his grace seemed so hopeful after being alone for so many millennia.

Sam didn't act too concerned by their links (although he had detected the faint echo of uncomfortableness from the Winchester brothers' shared bond) and if anything, the younger Winchester viewed the bonds with curiousness and a determination to learn, regardless of the side effects.

Still, he hadn't gained the courage to ask either angel about the sacred links, preferring to do his own research (which wasn't proving all that enlightening).

Castiel was providing the greatest problem.

The younger angel, like Sam, was curious about the bonds, never having partaken in one before. However, his adventurous nature was causing Gabriel to lose focus of trying to close his bonds, and once or twice the archangel had caught his little brother exploring their link, making it expand marginally. 

Obviously, Gabriel's not-quite-fully-healed grace had fooled itself into thinking this meant another angel had taken an interest in him, and considering this was one of the only angels he actually trusted, his grace had been entirely happy to reciprocate.

Cas had immediately retreated, rejecting his unplanned advances and causing Gabriel to tense as he was reminded of how his previous bonds had turned sour as his mates slowly came to detest one another, and finally, him.

The archangel reasoned Cas had only rejected him because the bond had never been wanted in the first place, but a small part of his grace still ached no matter how he thought about it. 

It only worsened when he spotted Castiel's subtle need to be closer to Sam and Dean whenever they touched one another; nothing intimate, but Cas had never searched _him_ out for such gestures and he felt like he was unwelcome in whatever was going on between his 'mates'.

He knew it was the bonds that were causing most of these unwanted feelings, and if they hadn't all been connected, he probably wouldn't have even noticed, but his grace was a finicky thing and sometimes he wished it would pipe down and let him forget all the pain he had suffered.

Another problem was how he and Cas still hadn't discussed the elephant in the room i.e. _the reason he and Cas had bonded to one another in the first place._ It made sense why they had bonded to the Winchesters; humans were very rarely aware of what their souls did, so it truly was an accident that they had bonded. However, he and Cas should have been able to prevent their graces from melding, even if they had temporarily lost control of them. 

It would have hurt to pull back if their graces were half-merged, but the fact was to have merged completely, they must have, at least to some extent, reached for each other during their attack on the demons. 

Yet neither of them had had the courage to discuss it with one another.

The archangel flicked a Haribo heart across the table unhappily, ignoring Sam's quirked eyebrow as it hit his book.

They needed to find a witch and soon. He wasn't sure how long he'd be able to take all these confusing emotions.

And not just his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This bond is more trouble than it's worth it seems...
> 
> Hope you enjoyed - tell me what you think! Improvements welcome. :)


	4. Chapter 4

They had visited seven more witches and still no luck.

The four had been 'mated' for around six weeks now and to their collective horror, the links between them were only growing stronger due to none of them having learned how to control their ends.

To be fair, they hadn't had much time with all that had happened after finding out that the reason Crowley was so quiet was because he was hiding Amara, and feeding her demon souls (or had been) and now all of Hell was absolutely terrified of the powerful creature living with them. 

She was ageing quickly too; faster than they'd all anticipated and was beginning to look to Earth's surface for sustenance.

Then Sam had started having visions; nothing precise, but enough to warrant a little bit of concern, especially when he believed it was God who was trying to tell him something.

Although both angels had listened carefully to his explanations, they had to admit they couldn't gather anything from the little snippets he'd seen, so they too were at a loss as to what the visions meant.

The bonds were a hinderance if anything; they slowed down research by providing such a great distraction, and the mixed signals and feelings coming from everyone at once was confusing and unhelpful.

So _of course_ the bonds strengthened enough to allow the smallest of thoughts to pass through as well, rather than just emotions.

And really, Dean didn't need to know about Sam's _'experiment'_ in college. Even if it was a dream; that was far too much information about his little brother's sex life.

It was mostly dreams when thoughts were transferred, but thoughts that invoked strong emotional reactions were also transmitted between the links without any way to stop them. They couldn't even control who saw them.

So when Dean walked into Hell with the intention of killing Amara, only for Crowley to trap him and attempt to kill him, Sam, Cas and Gabriel felt his fear first before the very clear picture of the demon about to stab him snapped into view.

Sam had been down there with him, in a different part of Hell as he tried to keep the other demons busy, and he fought harder than before, panic racing through their shared bond as he pleaded with Dean just to hold on a little longer until he could get there.

Cas had been on a mission of his own and his whole thought process was derailed at Dean's situation and the burning terror coming from Sam. He had been about to abandon his mission when Gabriel's ends of the bonds had ignited with fury and determination as his thoughts of murdering the demon in a Pagan-like ritual were projected through their connections.

However, in the few seconds it took for Gabriel to launch himself through Hell, Dean was already free, staring at Amara in a mixture of horror and fascination as she tortured Crowley in his own domain.

She said something about Dean not being able to kill her, before Gabriel shot in and whisked Dean, and then Sam, away to safety, with nothing but a crease of Amara's forehead to prove that he was ever there.

Dean looked troubled, scared even and when Gabriel and Sam tried to question him, he locked up, recoiling from their reassuring touches.

"Please, Dean," begged Sam. "What happened? Just tell us. Don't shut us out."

"Nothing," he growled, that carefully-guarded mask settling into place like all the other times when Dean was frightened or uncertain. "She overpowered me. I couldn't kill her."

Sam closed his eyes defeatedly because he knew when his brother was lying, but he also knew when he didn't want to talk, he wouldn't open up an inch. So he sighed and was about to turn and give up when Gabriel frowned, and without seemingly any effort at all, reached out to Dean using the bond.

He couldn't control who the sensations were directed to, so they all felt the comfort and care and soothing through their ends, but it was enough to make Sam's breath hitch and for something to flash behind Dean's eyes.

Castiel still hadn't returned so they had no idea how he was reacting.

But at Dean's slight falter in his cold mask, Gabriel shoved more comfort and soothing down the bonds, adding in desperation and worry, until the older Winchester dropped his mask completely and dared to relax into Gabriel's grace.

For the first time in a very long time, Dean succumbed to the echoes of _safety_ and _protection_ he hadn't realised he'd so terribly needed. He'd spent so long distrusting everyone and everything, he'd almost forgotten that it was okay to let go with those he relied on the most.

A flicker of a smile crossed Gabriel's face as he felt Dean gingerly reach out to his grace and Gabriel was happy to humour the human, gently brushing his grace against Dean's soul in a gesture of trust and care.

Dean gasped and quickly pulled the thread of his soul away, finding the sensations too loving and protective to be borne out of friendship alone, and Gabriel allowed a short burst of apology to follow his mistake.

"Sorry," he whispered and Dean shook his head.

"It just feels too..." he trailed off, unwilling to finish that sentence. How could he delicately put it that it felt more intimate than sex?

Gabriel seemed to understand though because he grimaced and took a step backwards. Dean almost reached out to him again.

He shook the thought from his mind and dropped his gaze to the floor as he analysed the situation with Amara. She had saved him; told him they shared a connection of some sort (very different from the ones he shared with Sam, Cas and Gabe). But he hadn't had it in him to kill her. As soon as he'd been in her presence, it was like his mind and body had been under her control and he hadn't been able to harm her. He hadn't _wanted_ to harm her.

That was a terrifying thought.

He told Sam and Gabriel as much and the pair shared a worried glance.

"I wish I could tell you what it meant, kiddo," said Gabriel apologetically, "but The Darkness has been locked up for so long... Even I barely remember what she was like. I don't know how much she's capable of now."

Dean frowned. "But you and the other archangels were the ones who locked her away, right? Surely you could do it again?"

A flash of regret and bitterness crossed Gabriel's eyes before it was gone again.

"Even if I could somehow rally us all together again; Raphael's dead and nobody knows where Dad is. It took five of us last time to tie her up and I can't do it alone."

Dean sighed. "And Michael and Lucifer are out of the question."

Gabriel winced slightly and Sam eyed him curiously for a moment before placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Don't beat yourself up over it," he said softly and Gabriel offered him a tiny smile.

Dean watched the exchange with no small amount of interest. Maybe the bonds were making them all act a bit off, but he swore there was something more tender than the usual reassuring shoulder squeeze going on between the two.

He closed his eyes. These bonds were evidently driving him crazy.

"Right. Any other ideas?" Asked Dean wearily, the stress from his time with Crowley and Amara weighing down his tone, and Gabriel's grace ached to soothe his 'mate', to let him know everything was going to be okay and that he was safe.

He crammed these dangerous feelings into the deepest recesses of his mind.

"You'll be the first to know," he replied, his smile not reaching his eyes and Dean nodded tiredly.

"Any luck with finding a witch?" He asked, desperate for a subject change and Sam took pity on his brother.

"Maybe. Wanna come check it out, see what you think?" He asked as he nodded to the library and Dean managed a half grin before following his brother, Gabriel not too far behind.

 

* * *

 

Meanwhile, Cas had opted to continue on his quest when he'd felt Gabriel successfully rescue the brothers through the bond. He knew his brother would take care of the pair and he was sure the others would prefer him to retrieve the Demon Tablet from Metatron's clutches now that he had been given the opportunity.

He found the snivelling ex-angel filming some poor human's slow death and after healing the fearful, pleading man, he ushered Metatron to somewhere more private.

He expected a cleverly crafted riddle to have been used to hide the powerful Demon Tablet, so he was pleasantly surprised when he spotted it poking out of the scribe's mouldy mattress.

He decided to question Metatron on The Darkness, to see if there was anything that could be of use to Team Free Will. After all, Metatron may have been a slimy rat, but he was a slimy rat who had read a lot of books and had gained quite a bit of knowledge over his miserable existence.

But then, Metatron started to mock him, tease him for all the disruption he'd caused in Heaven and how so many had died for him. He told him how every angel hated him; the renegade angel who had killed so many of his brethren and Castiel felt rage bubble up within him.

How dare this murderer accuse him of slaughter when he'd done so much worse! Metatron was greedy, power-hungry and calculating and he had forced Cas into fighting a war he'd never wanted to take part in. Yet here he was, acting as though Castiel was the villain.

His blade fell into his palm as Metatron continued to taunt him, begging him to kill him now he was human and Cas was fully on board with that plan, readying his blade to take one fatal strike as his anger and hurt at being shunned by all his brothers finally boiled over into a mess of pure hatred for the abomination before him.

He beat Metatron bloody, relishing the sound of his knuckles cracking against the scribe's face and just as he prepared to stake his blade through the ex-angel's chest, a steadying calm seeped across his bond with Sam, just as comfort and soothing leaked from Dean.

Castiel paused as Gabriel's end of the bond flared with logical thoughts; reasoning that if Cas were to kill Metatron now, he wouldn't be able to gain any information on Amara.

He focused on the clarifying emotions from Dean and Sam's links and willed his enraged grace to control itself as he lowered his blade.

"No," he stated firmly as Metatron practically offered himself to Castiel's weapon and the scribe scowled and taunted him once more in an attempt to force Castiel to kill him.

The young angel resisted again before making Metatron reveal that in order to create the world, The Darkness had to be sacrificed. It wasn't new news as Gabriel had already told them as much as he was able to about The Darkness, but Castiel had hoped Metatron might have had some more insight into the whole situation.

It turned out he was as useless as he believed his human form to be.

Out of some sort of disgusted pity for the pathetic creature before him, Castiel deemed him harmless and left without killing him, much to the confusion of Sam and Dean, and the indifference of Gabriel. He had never been particularly fond of the scribe either, but he wasn't partial to more of his siblings' deaths (even if they were worthless and graceless) any more than Castiel was.

They continued the search for a witch.

 

* * *

 

That evening, as Sam's eyes ached from research and he deemed it time to call it a night, he slowly shuffled off to bed, his vision growing fuzzy as thoughts that weren't any of the others' and didn't seem like his own crackled in and out of view.

It was difficult to focus on them at first; to form a clear picture of what he had realised was probably another vision, but what he saw made him frown in confusion.

There was a dull fence, heavily reinforced and a little bit cracked from years of standing, but still strong. It was dark around the fence... no... it wasn't a fence, it was a chain. Wrapped around stone walls. 

Fingers poked through gaps in the wall and Sam had to close his eyes as the vision faded from view again. He pulled it back.

Long, slender fingers sliding through the wall, restless but patient, and then the wall wasn't a wall at all... it was a cage. An impossible cage trapping impossible creatures and the more Sam's brain made sense of what it was looking at, the more the cage came into view; great chains slung across it, binding it and crushing it, keeping the things inside it isolated and safely locked away from the world, the universe. 

Lightning streaked across the sky, if that's what the unforgiving backdrop could even be called, and vicious rumbles echoed around and seemingly from _inside_ the cage as the beings inside prowled about it.

Sam felt his body freeze up, eyes wide and fearful as he tried to deny what he'd just seen. That couldn't be right. Surely he wasn't expected to venture towards the Cage? The Cage where Michael and Lucifer fought tirelessly, tearing and taunting one another for the rest of eternity. What was he supposed to do when he got there?

He tried to calm his thoughts, allowing reason and logic to set in; he didn't want his panic flowing through the bonds, especially when he knew Dean was sceptical of the visions at best.

Was this the only way they could defeat Amara? Send her back to where she came from? It sounded plausible; Michael, Lucifer and Gabriel all working together to rid the Universe of The Darkness. But how could he be sure if Michael and Lucifer would attempt to put aside their differences in order to save the Universe? He didn't even know if they'd be willing to work with Gabriel, let alone each other.

Sam wasn't stupid; he'd seen the way Gabriel had flinched when his brothers' names were mentioned. There was obviously a lot of bad blood between them all and Sam didn't want to be the one to cause all that to explode.

Yet, there seemed to be no other way to beat The Darkness. The archangels had done it before; surely they could do it again?

He gulped and closed his eyes, trying not to think about how they would get both Lucifer and Michael out of the Cage.

He hoped it didn't involve him and Dean as meat-suits.

 

* * *

 

When Gabriel felt Sam's panic, he paused, confused. Then a few images of what the younger Winchester was thinking about accidentally slipped through the bonds.

Dean frowned, not entirely sure what he was looking at; Castiel had stiffened and Gabriel...

Gabriel almost threw up.

Cas was by his side immediately, nodding tightly at Dean, who was shooting them both concerned glances, before whisking Gabriel away to an unused bedroom in the Bunker.

"This has got to be some form of twisted joke that I'm not seeing the funny side of," seethed Gabriel and Castiel's face fell in sympathy.

"Sam is not going to the Cage," growled the archangel, for once not denying the desire to protect his 'mate' that the bonds were causing.

Castiel had this odd contemplative look on his face that Gabriel immediately hated because it meant he was going to say something the archangel wouldn't like.

"You said yourself that you can't defeat Amara alone," Cas said slowly, cautiously, as if he was treading on thin ice, which in Gabriel's opinion, he was, and there were some huge crocodiles lying just below that fragile ice.

"Sam is _not_ going to the Cage," repeated Gabriel lowly and Cas must have had a lot of courage because he lifted his head to meet Gabriel's fiery gaze.

"He could talk to them. See if they would be willing to help. Maybe there's a way for Sam to stay outside the Cage whilst Michael and Lucifer are still locked inside."

Gabriel's eyes were glowing a dim gold due to his hard fury and Cas looked as though he wanted to back down as their bond burned with outrage and hostility. Still, he stood his ground.

"I know they hurt you, brother, but we can't do this alone," murmured Castiel quietly but confidently, and Gabriel couldn't help the way his face crumpled in distress.

"I can't," whispered Gabriel brokenly and before Cas had a chance to reply, Gabriel let his reasons pass through the bond, trying his best to make sure Sam and Dean didn't have to suffer through them.

Cas' eyes flashed blue in horror at what he saw and felt.

_Joy. Joy and happiness and delight at sharing bonds with the three other archangels. There was love and a warm sense of family between them all as they talked and soared together, groomed one another's wings and acted as any contented flock would._

_But then the fighting began. Michael and Lucifer started it and then Raphael got irritated enough to join in. There was annoyance and spite and anger where there shouldn't have been, and when Gabriel had tried to fix it, he had been yelled at; dragged into all the fighting._

_Anger morphed into hatred, irritation into contempt and their shared bonds dripped with fury and murderous rage. Strain was cast upon their connections and the bonds began to fray at the edges, weakening with every argument, every ill thought and it pained them all._

_Raphael became distant, unwilling to spend time with those he had once loved more than life itself, and Michael and Lucfier continued to argue and mock each other until it came to physical blows._

_Gabriel, the youngest of the four, had been terrified and heart-broken all at once and his mind was filled with ideas of fleeing Heaven to escape all the confused and scared stares from the smaller angels._

_His mates had been disgusted by his thoughts, calling him a coward and an immature fledgling for not standing up for himself. After a while, Gabriel began to believe them and the repulsion leaking across all three bonds only hurt him more._

_So he left. He closed off his ends of the bonds and started a new life as Loki. He did everything he could to forget the life he'd lost and for a time, it had worked as he embraced the role of the Trickster._

_But then, Lucifer had been cast out of Heaven and all that hatred and contempt and outrage blasted through everyone's bonds, breaking Gabriel's tight seals and overwhelming him with the intensity of all his brothers' emotions._

_He collapsed to his knees and screamed in a mixture of agony and despair as bonds that were never meant to have broken shattered into a billion tiny fragments._

_He felt empty and lost as three holes opened up in his grace and for a few moments, he contemplated killing himself. But then he shook his head, because his brothers had already damaged him so much; he wouldn't allow them to finish him off as well._

_So he stayed away from angels and made life his own and even though he could feel loneliness tugging at his grace, he enjoyed what he'd created and the holes didn't gape so wide anymore._

_The Pagans didn't like him all that much, but that was okay (not many people did), because it meant he didn't have to get too close to anyone and nobody would find out about his origins as an archangel._

_He had a fling with Kali and he felt tendrils of happiness creeping into his being as he had fun on Earth learning about humans and monsters and demigods. He was content._

_Then Lucifer had burned it all down in front of his eyes, murdering him in the process._

Castiel closed the gap between them, tugging his brother into his arms as tears brimmed in both their eyes. He crushed Gabriel to his chest as the archangel buried his face into his little brother's neck.

Gabriel had lost _everything_.

No wonder the archangel was so averse to the idea of sending Sam to the Cage; Lucifer, Michael and Raphael had destroyed everything he'd held dear and now, one of the humans that had shown Gabriel the only affection and care he'd had in centuries was at risk of being taken away from him by the very same people.

"I can't," Gabriel whispered again, words muffled by Cas' neck and the younger angel just held him tighter.

"Sam is strong. He resisted Lucifer for _years_. He even saved Dean whilst being possessed. He won't leave us," murmured Cas, because that's what all this was about. The bonds might have changed their feelings and ideas a little, but the four of them saw themselves as a family, even if they refused to acknowledge it. 

Gabriel was frightened of losing his newfound family.

_Familyloveprotect_

Gabriel gasped at Cas' pulse of feelings down their bond, and he really hoped Sam and Dean couldn't feel how much of an overwhelmed, trembling wreck he'd just become as he sobbed into his brother's neck.

The bursts of affection and care for the archangel were enough to make him break down in relief and desperation as his grace greedily absorbed all Cas' was willing to give.

He responded with tendrils of love and gratefulness and a desire to protect his family, smiling when he felt Cas tense before the younger angel took what Gabriel was offering, just as needy and frantically as he had. Cas had had a hard time with their siblings as well.

They settled more comfortably into one another, each basking in the presence of a brother they could completely trust before Gabriel sighed softly.

"I really can't beat Amara alone," he admitted and Cas knew he'd won.

It didn't feel like much of a victory.

He smoothed his hand over Gabriel's back soothingly.

"We'll ensure Sam doesn't get anywhere near them. If his safety is not one-hundred percent guaranteed, he doesn't go."

Gabriel managed a half-hearted smile at that.

"Thank you, Cas," he said quietly and Castiel knew it wasn't just for his promise.

"We will never hurt you, brother. You know you always have a home with us," he murmured as he pulled back to look at Gabriel.

The archangel's eyes were humbled and warm with appreciation.

"You don't know how much that means to me," he choked and Cas shook his head amusedly as he allowed a tiny pulse of affection to reach Gabriel through the bond.

"Actually, I do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look! Warm fuzzies!
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who don't know: _Rabbit_ is a brand of vibrator sold in the UK.

It took them a week to work out that maybe it wasn't a witch they should be looking for to solve their bond issues. 

"Hey, what about a psychic?" Sam asked seemingly out of the blue one day.

"For the visions?" Dean grunted. They'd all discussed what Sam's visions could have meant and whilst Dean was insistent they could find another way, even the two angels had to admit they couldn't think of any other reason Sam would be dreaming about the Cage. Maybe a psychic could provide a second opinion on the bleak outlook.

Sam scrunched his nose up.

"For the bonds," he said slowly, as if addressing a small child and Castiel raised an eyebrow.

"You think a psychic would possess a greater understanding of unearthly bonds?" He summarised and Sam shot him a small smile.

"Why not? Witches have proved useless, so maybe it's time to broaden our horizons."

Castiel nodded in agreement as Dean hummed contemplatively.

"I guess it's worth a shot," shrugged Dean. "As long as there's no haunted furry animal masks involved," he added, shuddering at the thought of the last case.

Gabriel chose that minute to pop into the room, lollipop wedged firmly between his teeth.

"Thought you liked cute bunnies, Dean-o" he winked and Sam rolled his eyes as Dean snorted. 

"Not those kind of bunnies."

"Dean's more of a Rabbit guy," smirked Sam and Dean shot his brother a heated glare as Gabriel cackled. Cas watched the exchange blankly before deeming it a 'Human Thing'.

"Where've you been anyway, Short stack?" Huffed Dean and the archangel sobered.

"Researching. There's mumblings of a full-scale angel attack on Amara. Not sure what it's gonna achieve though. Might weaken her but I doubt it will get rid of her completely."

Castiel tilted his head. "I'm surprised they've put aside their differences long enough to work together."

Gabriel snorted. "I know. It's not happened yet though; nothing may come of it." He turned to the Winchesters. "In the meantime, you two look as if you want to tell me something?"

Sam slid a phonebook across the table, pointing to an unassuming name as Gabriel neared it.

"Missouri Moseley." He paused as he checked his vast memory for the name. "Psychic, huh?" He hummed thoughtfully after a moment. "It's worth a try."

They had only just begun to learn how to stifle some of the thoughts and emotions constantly flowing through and strengthening their bonds. Gabriel was the most adept at it, having had previous practice, but they were still all unbelievably terrible at stopping the bonds from opening whenever they felt anything.

It was particularly frustrating for Sam and Dean as they already lived in one another's pockets; it would have been nice to have had some form of privacy, but their shared bond had so far prevented that.

They weren't all that fond of knowing when the other was in the bathroom or performing... _other_ activities. It was just weird. And creepy.

Gabriel could marginally control what he felt from the brothers' bonds, and although he took every opportunity that he could to tease them, he also knew when to give the humans their privacy.

Castiel pretended to be naive to what certain emotions meant and as long as he never mentioned what he was accidentally privy to, Sam and Dean were content to believe that.

"I, for one, am just looking forward to being able to use a toilet in peace, without one of you making some quip," said Dean before eyeing Gabriel pointedly.

The archangel grinned proudly as Sam rolled his eyes in amusement.

"So, we gonna give it a shot or what?" Asked Sam, slamming the heavy book closed as he stood. The others shared a glance before making their way to the Impala (Dean refused to use _"Angel Air"_ because there was no way he was going to fork out cash on laxatives when he already had a perfectly functional mode of transport that didn't mess with human biology).

"Seriously, Dean? Taylor Swift?"

"Shut up, Sam."

"Wouldn't have to put up with this on _'Angel Air'_."

" _Shut up,_ Sam."

The car rolled into the early morning sun.

 

* * *

 

"Winchesters? I've not seen you two in years."

Sam and Dean ducked their heads guiltily. 

"Sorry about that Missouri. We've been a little busy," confessed Sam.

"With the apocalypse," quipped Gabriel, earning him a dirty glare from both brothers.

The older lady quirked an eyebrow. "I know."

Sam and Dean blinked in surprise as Gabriel chuckled.

"Psychic," she reminded as they shuffled into the house. "Now, who are your friends? I can see by their energies they're not human."

"Uh... Angels," mumbled Sam, opting to be honest and Missouri's eyebrows raised to her hairline.

"I never would have thought..." She shook her head in disbelief before narrowing her gaze at Cas and Gabe.

"You two aren't what I would've pictured as ineffable celestial beings. Where are the halos and wings?" 

Gabriel smirked. "If you value your eyesight, it's probably best we keep them hidden."

She frowned as she moved to sit behind a small dining table. "Don't you be getting sassy with me, boy. I'm not the one who's gone and bonded myself to a couple of humans. I suppose you'll be wanting those removed?"

Cas squinted as the others blinked in shock.

"How did you-?"

"Lucky guess," she interrupted and Gabriel chuckled. It was rare a human would show such attitude after learning who he was. Usually humans feared him; the change was refreshing.

"I like you," he grinned and Missouri winked at him.

"Still, it doesn't mean you're any less stupid for tying yourself to these hunters. I've got to admit, I thought you didn't have any wings because these two had chopped them off."

Sam and Dean looked offended at the very notion, but Cas tilted his head thoughtfully.

"If it's any consolation, Dean did attempt to stab me when we first met."

Missouri eyed Dean reproachfully. "How are you not dead, boy?"

"He has been quite a few times," snorted Gabriel.

"Yeah, thanks to you," huffed Dean and the archangel grimaced guiltily.

Immediately, reassurance trickled through the bond from Sam as the younger Winchester ensured Gabriel knew his brother didn't hold a grudge, and probably didn't even realise what he'd said could be taken as accusing.

Gabriel sent a burst of apology in reply to both Winchesters anyway, though he wasn't sure if Cas had caught it as well. Dean frowned in confusion but otherwise ignored the bond.

"Is there any way you can break these things?" Asked Dean. "It's weird being able to feel three other people at once."

"Depends what kind of connections they are," mused Missouri, glancing between Sam and Gabriel suspiciously.

"Mating bonds," replied Cas succinctly and Dean sputtered in embarrassment. 

"Cas, you can't just..."

But Missouri already had her eyebrows raised. "And just how do you _accidentally_ mate yourselves together?"

Sam chuckled awkwardly. "It's a long story. Can you break them? We're not exactly fond of the idea of being, ah... _mated_ for all of eternity."

Missouri studied them for a moment, seemingly peering into their souls and graces and the thin links between them.

"Hm." Was all she said and the tone was odd and contemplative. "If you're sure," she continued, which was a really strange thing to say because surely she could tell they were all uncomfortable with the bonds?

"Sit down," she ordered and they did, each watching her curiously.

"Hold hands," she commanded and they did that too, albeit a little stiffly.

"Is this so you have a complete pathway between all our links?" Castiel asked and Missouri chuckled.

"No, I just like seeing you boys squirm."

They quickly let go of each other's hands and both Sam and Dean frowned at her.

"Consider it revenge for not visiting me for ten years," she huffed and the two averted their gazes once again in shame.

They both mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like an apology before the older woman took pity on them.

"Who wants to go first?" She asked and Gabriel jerked his head towards Dean.

"I think Princess will pop a blood vessel if he has to go another second mated to his brother."

Dean winced. "Thought I told you never to use those words in the same sentence? And don't call me _Princess_."

The archangel snapped a Hershey bar into existence. "See?" He grinned as he unwrapped it and Missouri rolled her eyes.

"Alright Dean, come a little closer. Let me see what I can do."

When he was close enough, Missouri placed her hand over his chest and concentrated, eyes closed, for a few seconds. Dean was surprised when he felt a gentle tugging on the bonds and if the others' startled expressions were anything to go by, they could feel it too.

Missouri frowned the more she explored before finally settling on Dean's bond with Sam.

"You're in luck," she murmured as she prodded the bond with her mind. Then suddenly, he could no longer feel Sam's concern. In fact, he could no longer feel _Sam_ ; the link had been severed seamlessly and Dean found himself breathing a sigh of relief as his soul relished in its new privacy. 

Sam, too, seemed to slump in relief as he realised he and Dean wouldn't have to share an intimate connection anymore; excessive co-dependency was one thing, but soul-bonding with a brother? That moved into the realms of bizarre and disturbing.

It was like having a weight lifted off both their shoulders, and they smiled, knowing they wouldn't have to suffer through any more inappropriate thoughts or feelings radiating from one another.

"Awesome. Thanks, Missouri," grinned Dean and the psychic nodded, but she seemed a fraction troubled.

"Can't wait to get the rest of them gone if that's what it feels like," continued Dean, oblivious. "Ready for round two and three?"

Missouri hesitated, before gingerly placing her hand back on his chest.

She tugged at the bonds with Castiel and Gabriel, both angels sitting a little straighter at the odd sensations.

"You sure you want to do this?" Missouri asked uncertainly and Dean frowned.

"Of course. Didn't you get the _'I don't want to be mated'_ part?"

She cracked an eye open to glare at him before focusing on the bonds once more. She gave a few experimental pokes at the links before scowling and... gliding along the bonds, away from the root to his soul.

She zoned in on Dean's bond with Castiel, pulling and prodding at it before sighing and removing her hand from Dean's chest.

"The links are still there," said Dean, confused and Missouri shook her head.

"I can't break them. They're too strong; far thicker than the one with your brother."

The four men blinked in shock.

"How's that possible?" Asked Sam. "We've all shared the bonds for the same length of time. How can those two be stronger?"

Missouri paused and the others waited with bated breaths; they all knew when there was something important to be said that they probably wouldn't like. 

"Because there's a... deeper connection between those bonds."

Dean scowled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Missouri bit her lip as she eyed Dean warily.

"It means there are... complex feelings integrated into those bonds. More intimate emotions."

The four balked.

"...You... you can't be serious," stuttered Dean. "They can't... we're just friends! A team." He shook his head. "They're angels!"

Missouri offered him a sympathetic glance, but Dean would have none of it. He turned his gaze upon Castiel and Gabriel, accusation and defensiveness in his eyes.

"Are you kidding?" He hissed and the angels' eyes widened in surprise.

"You told us it was an accident! You said you didn't want these bonds any more than we did and now, what? You actually do have feelings for us but you were too scared to come out with it like normal people, so you bound us all together with freaky angel magic, even though you know both me and Sam don't want this?" Dean seethed and both angels' jaws dropped open in disbelief, words caught in their throats.

"Dean-" Sam blurted, shocked at the accusation, but his brother wasn't done.

"We trusted you! You made us believe you weren't like those other stupid angels. You said you'd never manipulate us or use us like Michael and Lucifer and Zachariah or any of the other hundred winged monkeys that have tried to get a _'yes'_ out of us. 

"What you've done is a thousand times worse than anything they ever tried. You said you can't interfere with free will, yet you've forced yourself into our souls and altered our thoughts and emotions without our permission. You didn't even need a _'yes'_! You just passed it off as an accident because you were both too cowardly to say you felt anything for us, because you knew we would reject you.

"Or maybe it was _because_ you knew we'd reject you that you forged the bonds in the first place? You couldn't take _'no'_ for an answer so you took what you wanted regardless of how we felt."

Sam looked terrified as Gabriel and Castiel's eyes glowed their respective gold and blue, expressions furious as all the lights in the house began to flicker with the great energy crackling around both angels.

Missouri shrunk in her seat as Dean backed off slightly, realising his mistake far too late.

"You would do well to remember who it is you're addressing, _boy_ ," growled Gabriel, tone fiery as he stood, and even though he was shorter than Dean, his very presence seemed to tower over the older Winchester, imposing and all-powerful despite still not having all his grace restored.

The table began to shake slightly as the anger radiating from both angels in waves suffocated the room, making all three humans feel very weak and small.

"We have saved you more times than we care to count and you have the audacity to state we have put our own needs before yours?" Hissed Castiel. "I have given everything up for you, Dean Winchester, _and_ your brother. I've killed my siblings, I'm hunted, I rebelled and I did it, all of it, for _you_."

Dean gulped quietly before his mask of bravado was back in place as he stood his ground against the two angels.

"Yet it doesn't change the fact that I'm tied to you for the rest of eternity, whether I want it or not. So you can guilt trip me into feeling sorry for you all you want, but I will never trust you again. Not after this. You're worse than Lucifer and Michael; at least they had to ask first. You just used and betrayed us."

The lights sparked and blew into a thousand tiny fragments as both angels' eyes flashed brightly in outrage.

" _How dare you!_ " Spat Gabriel and Sam swore he saw hints of gold behind the archangel, spanning wide and tall, almost feather-like in their outline.

"How _dare_ you accuse us of deceiving you," snarled Gabriel, the faint golden shadows behind him shifting and glinting in different positions. "How _dare_ you accuse us of forcing you into something so sacred and intimate for our kind!"

Dean was either brave or stupid because he lifted his chin in the face of the angels' rage.

"I don't care what it is for your _kind_ ," he growled defiantly, spitting out the word 'kind' as though Gabriel and Castiel were some sort of monster to be despised. "We never wanted this," he said as he gestured to his brother, who opened his mouth in protest as if to say _'hey, leave me out of this'._

"You think everyone should be awed by your presence; that we'll all be too frightened to speak out against you because of all these shows of power." Dean glanced at the broken lights. "You think you can get away with anything you want. Well, _you can't._ You claimed you were protecting us against those demons, yet all you really did was make us more vulnerable than ever. You got free access to our souls. I don't care if you have feelings for us or not; you lied to us when you said you didn't want the bonds. Why _should_ we ever trust you again?"

Dean's voice sounded more betrayed the longer he ranted and both Gabriel and Castiel looked more hurt than furious by the end of it. 

"How can you think that of us?" Asked Castiel, tone strained and Dean snorted.

"Look at the evidence," he bit out and both angels gasped at the hurt and bitterness gushing through the bond like a tidal wave, drowning and overwhelming them.

"We wouldn't-" began Gabriel, pained, before Dean huffed in disgust and stormed towards the front door.

"I'll _never_ forgive you for this," he choked before slamming the door behind him, leaving a heart-broken silence in his wake as the Impala's gentle rumbling faded into the distance, taking Dean with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spot the drama! Tell me what you think; improvements and criticism welcome. :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick heads up: There are mentions of rape in this chapter but only as a metaphor.

The next morning, Dean was frowning moodily into his coffee as if he could blame it for all his problems and everything that had gone wrong in his life so far.

He almost spilled said coffee into his lap when Sam paced into the kitchen, gaze icy and mouth drawn into a thin, furious line.

"Good morning," Dean drawled sarcastically, not in the mood to deal with any of his brother's lectures. It was a relief not being able to feel Sam's emotions any more as he had a feeling that if he could, his coffee would have probably landed in his brother's face rather than on his thighs.

"You're a jerk, you know that?" Snarled Sam and Dean scowled.

"Oh? How did you deduce that?"

Sam stalked a little closer, muscles tense. "Enough with this defensive attitude, Dean! After all Cas and Gabe have done for us, all they've given up and all the times they've saved our lives, you turn around to them and preach betrayal and deceit? Are you kidding me? What is wrong with you?"

Dean narrowed his gaze. "Don't take their side in this. You heard what Missouri said; the bonds are thick because they have feelings for us. Feelings I want nothing to do with - and neither should you! They used the bonds as an excuse so we couldn't say 'no' to them!"

"You're an idiot," scoffed Sam in disgust and Dean's eyebrows shot to his hairline as his mouth opened to tear into his brother.

"The bonds were thickened on _both_ ends, not just theirs," huffed Sam and Dean snapped his mouth shut, because surely he couldn't have heard that correctly?

"What are you talking about?" Growled Dean and Sam crossed his arms, unimpressed.

"Exactly what you're so afraid of admitting to yourself," bit out Sam. "Surprise! You're into angels now!"

"I'm not gay," grated out Dean and Sam snorted. 

"Seriously? That's the thing that's bothering you?" Suddenly, he was leaning over the table, eyes cold and fierce as he glared at Dean.

"Have you ever thought that after everything we've been through with them; all the times we've been there for each other, maybe you might care for them a little more than as 'friends'?"

Dean stiffened, something small and curious shining in his heart, whilst repulsion and a strange sense of disloyalty burned in his mind.

"I don't care what Missouri says; I'm not... _attracted_ or whatever to Cas or Gabe."

Sam threw his hands up. "Why is this such a difficult concept for you to accept? What does it matter what gender their vessels are?" He shook his head. "Actually, no. This isn't what this is about, is it? You're scared, aren't you? Scared of commitment. Scared of wanting not just one angel, but two."

He eyed Dean sternly. "You think you don't deserve something for yourself."

The older Winchester stood from his seat, ignoring how close that statement hit to home and he turned his back on his brother, unhappy scowl in place.

"I don't want _any_ angel," he huffed. "I'm not scared and I certainly don't want to be soul-bonded to two beings who were too cowardly to tell me they had feelings for us, so just tied us together for eternity instead."

Sam's teeth grated together. "Why are you being so difficult about this? Why are you blaming them?"

"Because they played us!"

"No they didn't!" Roared Sam, cornering his brother. "They didn't mean to bond with us; they never meant to tie us together in the most intimate way possible for an angel; a way that requires great trust and loyalty and patience. So congratulations for bad-mouthing their most sacred practice! Well done; you just ripped into two of your closest family members when they were at their most vulnerable; when they were literally bearing their entire beings to you; their very graces."

Sam shook his head disappointedly. "How could you? You accused them of forcing us to mate with them. For angels, that's like accusing them of rape. Cas and Gabe. You practically accused Cas and Gabe of raping us."

Sam let the weight of those words hang between them for a moment.

"You hurt them more than you can imagine with all the things you said," he sighed softly. "I'm not going to pretend I fully understand the bonds, but I know they can't manipulate us into feeling attraction. Our bond wouldn't have broken if they could, and then we'd be in a much more disturbing position."

Dean winced and Sam quickly ploughed on, encouraged by the slight reaction.

"Our feelings for them were already there. We might not have realised it, but they were, and evidently Gabe and Cas feel something for us too."

"Your bonds were the same as mine?" Dean asked weakly, wondering what else Missouri had told Sam and the angels after he'd left. Hopefully, they'd fixed her lights too.

Dean didn't need to turn around to know Sam was nodding. The thought that Castiel and Gabriel wanted him in at least some small way (or at least _had_ \- after the things he'd said, he wouldn't be surprised if they desired to see his body rotting in a desert somewhere) made his heart do funny things, and his soul was bright and hopeful. 

Or at least the parts closest to the bonds were. Another darker, more closed-off part of his soul writhed with displeasure and anger at the thought that these two beings wanted him. Even his mind was telling him it was wrong to be with them, to be close to them. 

He was confused and maybe... a little frightened about what it all meant.

"What d'you make of all this?" Muttered Dean focusing on the other elephant in the room. "We both want the same two angels. How would that even work?"

Sam hesitated. "If we were to pursue them? Who says it would have to be a problem?" Said Sam slowly. "We could make it work."

Dean scrunched his nose up as he turned to his brother.

"That's not how normal relationships work."

"Two hunter brothers, an angel and an archangel. What about any of that screams _'normal'_ to you?"

Dean crossed his arms. "Which brings me to my next point; we're brothers. Sharing two bed mates? That's not healthy. It's just plain wrong." 

Sam averted his gaze. "Honestly? It's healthier than being alone all the time. It's better than taking a random girl home from the local bar in hopes it will distract us long enough to get through another night without awful dreams." His tone was laced with sadness; longing almost. "Imagine waking up beside someone you trust. Someone you know every detail about; all their quirks and their hopes and dreams. Someone who knows you and cares for you despite everything we've ever done."

Dean noticed the falter in pronouns and he felt a stab of sympathy for his brother. Sam was lonely; they both knew that. Cas and Gabe knew that. If his brother cared for the angels as much as they seemed to care for him, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing if they could help him. Sam definitely deserved something good for himself after everything he'd put up with.

He knew for a fact Cas and Gabe were having a hard time being on the run from Heaven; never getting attention (not wanted attention anyway) from their siblings, so maybe they were lonely too? Maybe they could all help each other.

Dean though, Dean didn't need help. He... he wasn't lonely... at least, his brain and that hidden part of his soul seemed to insist he wasn't lonely, and after all the times he'd messed up, not just with Cas and Gabe and his brother, but with the rest of the world, he... they would never want him. He was a walking mistake.

He paused. Why was he even considering this? He wasn't in some silly teen romance drama. He didn't have... _feelings_ for Castiel or Gabriel. He cared for them, sure, but not like that.

Sam seemed discouraged by his silence and he sighed wearily.

"You could at least apologise for snapping at them."

Dean mulled that over. He could do that. He was beginning to regret having yelled such harsh things at them anyway and although he wasn't attracted to them, he still wanted to keep them as friends. As much as he had shied away from it before, Gabriel and Castiel were family. They deserved an apology.

"Fine. But that's as far as it goes. I'm not declaring my love unto them or anything, because it's not like that. I don't feel anything like that for them. They're just... brothers."

Sam nodded defeatedly. "Sure, Dean. Whatever."

The older Winchester frowned but didn't get a chance to argue as Sam trudged out of the kitchen.

"Just fix this," he tossed over his shoulder before rounding the corner, leaving Dean to wonder why his soul and mind and heart were warring with one another.

 

* * *

 

"Sam looked in a mood when he got up this morning," murmured Gabriel as he watched the rain streak down the window, the clouds grey and dull as if reflecting all their innermost thoughts.

Castiel closed the door behind him. It was odd to find Gabriel in the library, but it had the biggest windows and Cas could feel his brother just wanted to observe the world outside for a time.

He hesitated, not wanting to intrude, but Gabriel quirked an amused smile as he turned to offer a quick glance to the younger angel.

"You're not intruding, brother."

Castiel startled at that. Gabriel rarely addressed other angels formally, preferring to create nicknames for them, presumably due to all his time spent on Earth. The fact he had chosen to do so now spoke volumes for his sincerity.

The younger angel took a few ginger steps forward, causing Gabriel to snort.

"I won't bite, you know. Come here."

At the teasing poke at their bond, Castiel blinked and quickly crossed the distance separating them, until they were side-by-side, watching the rain dance across the earth.

A comfortable silence fell about the room as the pair gazed through the window, listening to the faint pitter-patter of water on glass.

"Humans are... stubborn creatures, aren't they?" Hummed Gabriel after a few minutes and Castiel eyed his brother with a raised eyebrow.

"Some of them are far more infuriating than 'stubborn'."

Gabriel grinned. "Indeed."

The smile faded as he focused back on the window.

"I can still feel your hurt," he said softly and Cas turned his head slightly without taking his eyes off the world outside.

"I can feel yours."

Gabriel sighed heavily. "You have a much more extensive history with them than I do. You have suffered through so much together and I can't imagine how much his words must have stung you."

Cas stared at him pointedly and Gabriel closed his eyes, grace pained from memories of a time long since passed.

"Alright, maybe I _can_ imagine it. Still, some of the things he accused us of..."

They quieted as their highly-tuned hearing picked up on Sam's irate voice from another part of the Bunker.

"The way he said it," murmured Cas, voice strained and Gabe frowned unhappily. "When the bond opened and all that... emotion rushed through..." The younger angel trailed off. "I... what if he meant it? What if... what if that's how he sees us?"

Gabriel whirled to fully face his brother.

"He doesn't. He can't. He was surprised and taken off-guard just like we were. He was probably freaking out about being bisexual or something equally human. You know how shallow they can be."

Cas frowned. "Those emotions we felt through the bonds... they weren't a side-effect of finding himself attracted to angels with male vessels. He truly felt offended by us. Betrayed."

Gabriel clenched his jaw. He had hoped his little brother wouldn't latch onto those painful emotions.

"I know," he sighed eventually. "I don't understand how he could accuse us of that either." His voice was tinged with distress and Castiel's face fell with his own upset.

"How could we have fallen for them?" Asked Gabriel, watching as a droplet of rain slid slowly down the window, merging with another droplet and connecting their respective trails.

Cas shook his head. "How did we not know we had fallen for them?"

Gabriel huffed. "Maybe we haven't so much as fallen completely for them as started to care for them a little more than as family."

Cas allowed a small smile to grace his expression.

"I've not heard you use that word in a long time, brother."

"I've not had need of the word in a long time," replied Gabriel sombrely and Cas wanted so desperately to reach out to his brother's grace at that. It seemed inappropriate though; too intimate at that time, now they knew all they did about themselves... about one another.

The let the quiet settle around them once more, watching and listening as the rain fell quicker and with heavier splashes.

"When you left Heaven, it was like a great light had been extinguished," murmured Castiel softly and Gabriel stiffened.

"Don't," he warned but Cas averted his gaze.

"All the fledglings missed you. You were the only archangel who paid any attention to us when the fighting began, comforted and soothed us, and then you just... left."

"Cas, please..." begged Gabriel, unable to look his brother in the eye.

"We thought... They told us you hated us. Said you'd run away to live with the Pagans; that you no longer cared for your brothers and sisters or the other archangels."

Gabriel's grace contorted in a mixture of sorrow and agony.

"None of us had any idea that you and the other archangels..." Cas trailed off, eyes glazed over in distant memory. "We knew you were close and when the fighting began, we were so lost, but none of us even considered you were..."

"Mates?" Gabriel chuckled hollowly and a tense pause filled the space between them. 

"Did they really tell you all I despised you?" The question was bitter and broken and Castiel nodded sadly. 

"All your classes, the younglings and the fledglings grew up believing the things Michael and Lucifer and Raphael told us. Even the higher ranks believed it."

"I always wondered why nobody came looking for me," huffed Gabriel, tone laced with regret and spite.

"When I saw you with the Winchesters that day, disguised as Loki, I was so angry and hateful. I thought all the rumours had proven correct and you truly had abandoned us for the Pagans, but then... when you sacrificed yourself... and when you, the _real_ you, showed up at the Bunker..." Castiel turned to his brother with so much shame and guilt shining in his eyes that Gabriel couldn't tear his gaze away.

"I'm so sorry, brother," whispered Castiel. "We were all so wrong about you. After what happened between the four of you... I can't imagine how devastating it must have been. I only saw a brief snapshot of what you experienced, but to have lived through it all first-hand... Gabriel, I'm so sorry."

Castiel was taken off-guard when six great wings, formed from pure grace energy and on a separate plane from human vision, stretched and enveloped him in a desperate hug.

"Gabe..." Cas gasped, awed at being granted the honour of touching a mighty archangel's wings; appendages that were just as effective as deadly weapons as they were at showing every emotion passing through an angel's grace.

"Do you know how long it's been since I've had a brother who actually cares about me?" Murmured Gabriel as he clutched Castiel's back and the younger angel's grace pulsed in a mixture of heartbreak and fury at all Gabriel had wrongly endured.

Gabriel must have felt it through the bond because he buried his face into the younger angel's neck, his own grace firing love and appreciation back to Castiel in response.

Castiel pulled Gabriel closer and they held each other for a few minutes, sharing emotions and thoughts through their bond.

"Seems I'm not the only one who's lonely," whispered Gabriel and Castiel smiled, snuggling into the archangel's wings.

Gabriel chuckled in surprise as the huge appendages, flowing like golden water as grace raced through them, curled more securely around Castiel, sending pleasant tingles of energy through his body as the 'feathers' brushed his skin.

"When was the last time someone groomed you, fledgling?" Hummed Gabriel and Castiel smiled at the name. He hid his face in Gabriel's warm neck, ancient angel hierarchy protocols rebooting and making him feel utterly safe and protected in Gabriel's wings. 

The archangel grinned as he smoothed a hand over Cas' back, their bond buzzing with affection and tender thoughts of _family._

"Show me your wings, Cas," ordered Gabriel softly and the younger angel ducked his head shyly.

"They're not as beautiful as yours," protested the younger angel and Gabriel's grace brightened in delight; pleased that his 'mate' liked his wings. 

"I'm sure that's a lie," huffed Gabriel. "Let me see them."

Castiel hesitated for another second before slowly unfurling his own wings; one pair of deep black limbs that glinted with midnight blues and purples as they flowed like liquid, feather-like outlines appearing with each minute shift of the huge wings.

Gabriel smiled as Castiel bowed his head, anxiously awaiting the archangel's judgement of the appendages. Although Castiel had tried his best over the years to groom them himself, the wings were messy and unkempt in the parts he couldn't reach (his grace could only be manipulated in limited ways) and presenting such untidy wings in front of an archangel was a little like wearing a bikini in a meeting with the British Royalty.

"They're gorgeous, Cas," breathed Gabriel, unable to help himself from reaching out to run his hand along the top of the wing and the younger angel gasped at the foreign sensation of another angel touching them. It had been too long.

He blinked when he registered an archangel had just complimented his wings and his vessel's cheeks flushed pink. Then he realised it was also his 'mate' who had praised his wings, and even though he knew the bond had been accidental and they weren't true mates, the thought still made his wings flap in a mixture of embarrassment and joy.

Gabriel laughed freely before reaching for both limbs to stop their erratic movements and Cas melted against the archangel when he felt the warming, bubbly aurora that once upon a time all the angels in Heaven had associated with the fun-loving archangel. It had been so long since any of them had felt such a presence.

The archangel held his brother close to his chest, combing his fingers through Castiel's 'feathers', shifting displaced grace back to where it should have been and soothing agitated energies which were causing the wings to look untidy.

Gabriel watched the dark liquid-like 'feathers' swirl between his fingers with a pleased smile. When they were all one big, happy family in Heaven, angels who were close (best friends, lovers, mates etc.) would groom one another in order to remove stress or strain in each other's graces. It wasn't as intimate as bonding with another's grace, but it was still rather personal, and not anyone was allowed to do it. It required a great amount of trust due to the nature of having to reveal part of one's grace, and the fact Cas had enough faith in him to not hurt or manipulate him (despite his status as _'archangel'_ meaning he could easily harm the lower angel) made his own grace sing with elation. 

It was wonderful to be wanted again.

"Do you recall rescuing Samandriel when he almost fell to Earth?" Mumbled Castiel, wings completely relaxed and eyes closed in contentment.

Gabriel chuckled. "I remember rescuing a lot of fledglings first learning to use their wings. You were one of them."

Castiel cracked an eye open, an amused quirk to his lips.

"I can't believe you remember that."

Gabe grinned. "You were such a rebellious youngling. Always getting into places you knew you weren't allowed."

Cas groaned softly, already knowing where the conversation was heading and the archangel laughed at the uncharacteristic   
show of childishness.

"Don't step on that fish, Castiel. Big plans for that fish," hummed Gabriel and Cas grumbled in mock irritation.

"I didn't notice it was there."

"You shouldn't have been on Earth in the first place."

"You told us so many stories about this planet. Other angels had visited it and I wanted to understand what it was all about."

"You were far too young to be flying unattended on Earth. We were half-worried you'd get trapped in an active volcano or something."

"It's not as though I could have died."

"No, but we were worried you'd get annoyed and destroy the volcano."

Castiel rolled his eyes, but his amusement trickled through their bond. Gabriel continued to smooth the wings over, focusing on ironing out all the kinks in Castiel's grace, before the younger angel's gaze landed on Gabriel's magnificent wings and he tilted his head as he noticed something.

Gabriel's wings were _chaotic._

The 'feathers' in all six wings were tangled and dishevelled. Some parts had obviously been taken care of by Gabriel himself, but most of the wings were bedraggled and shabby. It made sense, considering how long Gabriel hadn't been in contact with another angel, never mind one he trusted.

Without thinking, Cas reached up to fix part of a smaller wing and Gabriel froze, causing Cas to tense in realisation.

"It... It's been so long," choked Gabriel hoarsely and Cas gulped quietly before garnering the courage to comb his fingers through Gabriel's golden wings more firmly.

The archangel closed his eyes as his grace radiated an unbelievable amount of relief and desperation through the bond. Encouraged, Castiel stroked through the 'feathers' rhythmically, rearranging any displaced energies and causing Gabriel to lean forwards and part his lips slightly. 

Castiel watched the movement with keen interest, finding himself leaning forwards in anticipation of... _something,_ and Gabriel gazed at the younger angel with gratitude and fondness and something more... needy.

Then he blinked, seeming to remember where he was and who he was with and pulled back almost regretfully.

"When was the last time someone groomed you?" Asked Castiel, surprised by how husky his voice suddenly sounded and Gabriel took a moment to collect himself.

"Michael, Raph and Lucifer," whispered Gabriel, voice tinged with lingering intensity.

Castiel felt his grace twitch with an unusual possessiveness. Apparently he didn't like hearing Gabriel talking about the other archangels grooming him. If Gabriel's hungry glance at him was anything to go by, the archangel had just felt it too.

"That long?" Murmured Cas, willing his agitated grace to calm itself.

"Hm," nodded Gabriel, closing his eyes as he focused on the movement of the other angel's hands (and small amount of grace) in his wing, all the while continuing his own soothing manipulation of Cas' wing.

They stayed like that for two hours, trading stories and reminiscing about their time in Heaven; just chatting and laughing softly. Enjoying one another's presence and basking in the feelings of trust that came with being able to groom one another.

And that was how Sam found them. 

He froze, face red with embarrassment as he caught them whispering quiet words to one another, and although he couldn't see their wings, he had a feeling he'd walked in on something incredibly intimate that he had no right to be privy to. The densely grace-charged (but inviting) atmosphere was enough to prove that.

He was just about to turn and leave the room when Gabriel's voice floated across the library.

"It's okay, Sam."

And just like that, Sam relaxed, the strange ache in his heart vanishing. There was something utterly reassuring about the archangel's tone and as Cas hadn't protested either, the younger Winchester had to assume they honestly didn't mind him having interrupted whatever it was they were doing.

"Do you need help with something, Sam?" Came Castiel's query, all honest concern and Sam decided there was no need to ask what he'd just been witness to. Both angels deserved some alone time.

"Just thought you'd want to know that Dean's looking for you. I think he has a few things to say," he said pointedly, with a tiny smile and both angels glanced at each other before Gabriel shrugged.

"Better late than never."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love angel fluff.
> 
> Tell me what you thought :) Improvements welcome


	7. Chapter 7

"I'm sorry," Dean said when they were all seated awkwardly around one of the long tables they often used for research. "About what I said yesterday." Both angels continued to stare at him, unimpressed and Dean winced. Even Sam was looking at him as if to say _'really? That's all you've got?'_

"I know you'd never do anything to intentionally harm us. I was an idiot to doubt you and after everything you've done for us, I think it's me who's betrayed you, not the other way around." Dean sighed heavily as the clashing feelings in his heart, mind and soul once again fought with one another. A dark part of him was telling him to stop apologising and the other bits were telling him he was doing the right thing. It was exhausting.

"I've been a real jerk to you both. To all of you. I lashed out when I shouldn't have and I pushed you away when you needed support. I put up a wall between us 'cause I was scared and confused and I ended up hurting you and saying a load of ridiculous things that could never be true."

By then, Gabriel and Castiel's expressions had softened a little and Sam nodded at his brother encouragingly. 

"I know I've been insufferable about this whole bonding thing right from the start," admitted Dean. "I've made everything ten times more difficult and I've said some terrible things about a practice that's obviously very important and sacred to you guys. You've always been there for me and Sam and I know you've both sacrificed so much to help us. You've even given your lives for us," he mumbled ashamedly, realising how big of a fool he'd been to even think any of the things he'd accused the angels of.

"I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve to be yelled at and I wish I could take it all back." He gathered enough courage to look both angels in the eye.

"You've given up everything for us and I was stupid enough to accuse you of forcing us into a bond none of us wanted or even predicted. I'm an idiot, I know that and I just wanted to tell you that I don't really believe any of what I said. I was shocked and I didn't know what else to do, so I just said the first things that came to mind without really thinking it through." He averted his gaze guiltily.

Cas and Gabe shared a glance before Gabriel sighed quietly.

"It hurts that something like that would even enter your mind to begin with," he began and Dean grimaced. "But we appreciate the apology all the same."

The older Winchester shook his head. "You don't have to forgive me or anything; heck, I wouldn't expect you to. But I just want you both to know that I... that I don't know what we'd do without your help. Family doesn't end with blood, and you guys... you're family."

Sam grinned at his brother. He knew how much that word meant to Dean and only a select few had earned that title over the years. If Cas and Gabe's small smiles were anything to go by, they understood the weight behind that statement too.

Dean startled when gratitude pulsed through his remaining bonds.

"Thank you, Dean," said Cas quietly and the older Winchester offered a weak smile in return. 

Then it faded and he closed his eyes wearily. They still hadn't discussed the elephant in the room.

"I can't be your... The nature of these bonds; I know what Missouri said but I... I can't... You're my brothers. Nothing more. I don't know if you really do feel anything for me and Sam, but I just... _I can't_..." stammered Dean, tone strained and uncomfortable, and Cas and Gabe grimaced as Sam sighed silently.

"We were just as shocked at the news as you were, Dean," replied Castiel quietly. "But the bonds can't manipulate your free will, nor ours to that extent. They can only use the feelings a person already possesses, however faint or unrecognised they may be."

Dean shook his head, voice choked. "I... _I can't_..."

"No one is expecting you to," murmured Cas gently. He paused. "We honestly didn't know of our attraction to you, nor your attraction to us when we forged the bonds. They truly were accidental."

Dean winced before shaking his head once more.

"You don't have to explain that to me. I really don't hold it against you. You were protecting us and that's the end of it."

Gabriel and Castiel both looked distinctly uncomfortable now and there was a thick fog of tension clogging the atmosphere.

"But we can't ignore the bonds," continued Dean, fidgeting in his chair. "Even if none of us... act on them. They're still there and they'll only get stronger if we don't fully learn how to control them."

"So we'll learn more about them," shrugged Sam finally, causing the others to turn to him. "Angels have a head start in all this stuff, but us simple humans have no idea what our souls are doing half the time, and the other half we're not entirely convinced they even exist. Dean and I will work hard and learn to control our ends of the bonds and then you two won't be too distracted to handle yours. It's not exactly rocket science. You guys might just have to help us along with some of the basics."

Gabriel chuckled as Cas and Dean shared a glance. Trust Sam to find a logical way of seeing all of this mess.

"You may be right, Moose." Gabriel scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Actually, we could use these things to our advantage. We could close the bonds when we didn't need them and if any of us get into a difficult situation; a hunt, demons, angels, Amara... we have a direct contact for help. Just flood the bonds with panic and at least one of us will be able to race to the rescue," grinned the archangel.

The others tilted their heads. They hadn't thought of it like that; too busy worrying about the negative effects of the bonds, but put like that and these links didn't sound so terrible after all.

And just as suddenly as everything had tumbled so wildly out of control, it all went back to normal again; nobody was arguing and the troublesome bonds were settled, content and calm as the four's worries and concerns dissipated (or mostly dissipated; Dean still had that odd niggling at the back of his mind telling him he should be averse to the foreign bonds).

Maybe living with the intimate connections didn't have to be such a horrifying thought after all.

"Huh," said Dean and the others agreed with his enlightening analysis.

"So, chick-flick moment over; who wants lunch?" Announced Gabriel, clapping his hands together in anticipation and both Winchesters chuckled. 

When the archangel had first arrived, he had scoffed at the idea of such petty human trivialities such as cooking and baking, but with his depleted grace, he hadn't been able to snap anything into existence to satisfy his human hunger. After watching the Winchesters cook a few times, the weakened archangel had decided to try his own hand at it (Sam and Dean rarely used enough sugar in their food anyway) and found that he liked experimenting with different flavours. He and Dean had even competed a few times at who cooked better (Gabriel was by far the best at desserts, but he had never beaten Dean with anything to do with a chunk of meat).

Now Gabriel actively enjoyed cooking without the use of his grace, and both Winchesters appreciated it after a hard hunt, when they were too exhausted or sore to move. Even Castiel attempted to consume some of his brother's experiments, often pleasantly surprised when the intricate flavours reached his palate rather than the familiar taste of molecules.

Okay, so maybe Gabriel cheated with his grace _a little._

"I'll help you," offered Dean as he stood and Sam nodded at his brother as the pair left.

The younger Winchester turned to Castiel, who was gazing at the door their brothers had disappeared through. Sam coughed lightly, garnering the angel's attention.

"You ever read _'Good Omens'_?"

 

* * *

 

Two weeks later saw Sam and Dean tucked into bed, shattered from a bizarre hunt involving Sam's imaginary friend from his early childhood. 

The pair were progressing nicely with their exploration of the bonds, having fully grasped the basics of who to send their emotions and thoughts to, rather than it being entirely random. They were also making good head way with which emotions and thoughts to send down the bonds, although that was a little more challenging.

Cas was also learning how to use and manipulate the bonds. He often asked Gabriel for guidance, usually when the Winchesters were asleep, and although Gabriel had experience with mating bonds, he enjoyed relearning the controlling of them with the younger angel.

"It's far different reading a book than having the knowledge of the plot thrust into your mind," mused Castiel as his brother entered his room.

Neither of them needed a bedroom, but it was pleasant to have a private place of their own.

Gabriel cocked an eyebrow. "Did Metatron really give you the knowledge of every book he'd ever read?"

Castiel pulled a face. "And every film and radio show. It's rather annoying knowing how a story ends before it's even begun."

Gabriel grinned. "Then why are you reading..." He bent over to squint at the front cover of Cas' latest novel. "... _Hogfather?_ "

Castiel glanced at him. "Because Metatron didn't give me the complete stories so much as vague plot-lines and a myriad of famous quotes."

"Spoilers," summarised Gabriel amusedly and Castiel nodded distastefully.

"Besides," he said after a moment as he scanned the rest of the page, "I happen to enjoy the concept of _Discworld_."

Gabriel snorted before launching himself onto the bed, where he propped himself onto his elbows and stared at his brother.

"You wanted to learn more about closing the bonds?" He asked. "Or is Terry Pratchett more interesting than me?" 

Castiel made a show of turning the page and Gabriel whined childishly, prompting the corner of the younger angel's lips to twitch.

After receiving no further response, Gabriel's eyes gained a glint of mischief and he snapped his fingers, causing Terry Pratchett's epic novel to morph into E. L. James' dreadful one.

Castiel raised an eyebrow. _"My inner goddess is doing the merengue with some salsa moves."_ He paused to glance at the cover. "I don't think Metatron ever read this one."

Gabriel laughed as Cas put the book down. "You should read it. _Fifty Shades_ is a brilliant work of art."

"Just because Metatron hasn't read it doesn't mean I haven't heard of it. I'm not that naive, Gabriel."

The archangel let out another snort of amusement as his brother came to join him on the bed.

"You're missing out," grinned Gabriel and Cas rolled his eyes. "Now, how are you doing with shutting the bonds?"

Cas shook his head. "Admittedly not very well. The furthest I've got is stopping myself from projecting anything down them, but I can still feel everyone else."

Gabriel made a sound of acknowledgement. "Try focusing on the ends of the bonds as a physical hole, like a pipe. Seal up the end of the pipe and you shouldn't be able to feel anyone else's emotions or thoughts. Try it with our bond. Make sure the seal's firm."

Castiel frowned in concentration and Gabriel felt something stir between them, but it took a few goes for Castiel to place the 'seal' before Gabriel felt their bond go quiet.

He used a tendril of grace to prod gently at Cas' end of the bond, to check whether he had closed it tightly, and he smiled at his brother's success.

"Congratulations, Cas," said Gabriel and the younger angel smiled back, perking up slightly at the praise.

"Now, to undo the seal just-"

_Paintormentagony_

Both angels startled, eyes wide and shocked as they stared at each other. That had been Sam's bonds. Suddenly, they both doubled over at the unbelievably intense feelings of fear and excruciating agony as Sam's ends of the bonds flared to life again.

_An everlasting Cage, dark and too small to hold the two beings constantly at war with one another inside it. Blades clashed, brother against brother, mate against mate as two humans cowered in the corner. Half-brothers._

_As one, the two monsters turned feral gazes upon their terrified company and both humans shrunk in on themselves, trembling at the torture they'd already suffered a thousand times over and knew was still to come..._

Castiel forced soothing and comfort and safety through the bond, calming Sam's distressed soul and ending his awful nightmares. When he came back to reality however, he noticed Gabriel still bent over, body shaking and newly-unleashed wings twitching erratically.

Concerned, Castiel placed a gentle hand on his brother's back and Gabriel's head whipped up to meet his gaze. Castiel gasped at the hurt and brokenness in his golden eyes.

Immediately, the seal broke and Cas shoved as much love and reassurance as he could down their bond, and Gabriel grasped at it desperately, like a man starved of oxygen.

They somehow wordlessly wormed themselves into a position where Cas was holding Gabriel against his chest as he smoothed a hand over his back, and the archangel was clutching at the back of his brother's trench coat, attempting to convince himself that Castiel wouldn't turn on him like his previous mates had.

"Never," whispered Castiel fiercely as he hugged the archangel tighter, and Gabriel realised his insecurities must have slipped across the bond.

He pulsed gratitude over their link.

After a few moments, Gabriel sighed quietly. "How could we have all fallen apart so terribly?"

Castiel frowned sadly. "It isn't just the archangels, brother. All of Heaven is at breaking point. Factions against factions, seraphs against cherubs; we're fighting a war none of us really understand. We need guidance."

Gabriel closed his eyes. "When did it all get so out of hand?" He asked no one in particular and Castiel shook his head as he stroked the other angel's back comfortingly.

"They were my mates," murmured Gabriel after a while. "We were supposed to love one another unconditionally; support each other no matter what happened. So why are two of them currently in Hell, tearing at each other and causing as much pain and torture to one another as they possibly can? Why did one of them stab me through the chest? Why did one of them lose faith in Heaven and our Father and try to restart the apocalypse, with his own battling mates as the stars?"

Suddenly, Gabriel's mouth drew into an unhappy line. 

"Why did I leave them? Why did I abandon them?" He huddled in on himself. "In that hotel... I was ready to _kill_ Lucifer for those Pagans..."

Cas scowled. "You were standing up for what you believed in. You tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't listen. There was nothing you could have done, Gabriel. The apocalypse was always going to happen; Michael and Lucifer had no intention of stopping it. Even Raphael was angered at the Winchesters' interference... and mine," he muttered the last part ashamedly as he remembered his time summoning souls from purgatory. He wondered why Gabriel was letting him hold him when he'd been the one to kill his mate.

"Because we've all made mistakes," whispered Gabriel solemnly and Cas realised he hadn't kept as tight a lid on his emotions as he had first thought. "We've all done things we're not proud of. You were doing what you thought was best at the time, then afterwards, those things took you over and you weren't... _you_ anymore." An awkward silence followed.

"I'm sorry, brother," whispered Castiel brokenly and Gabriel shook his head.

"I should be saying that to you. To all of the angels I left behind to deal with Michael and Lucifer's fighting, and Raph's coldness and unwillingness to help."

"You were young," said Cas simply. "We all were. We thought paradise would last forever and it didn't."

They sat there quietly, taking comfort in having one brother who still had faith in them and trusted them to support them through all the pandemonium surrounding The Darkness, Heaven and Hell.

Castiel could still feel his brother's lingering hurt and distress at seeing Sam's nightmares of the Cage and he allowed trails of family and affection to pass through their bond. He frowned at a few 'feathers' that had become displaced in Gabriel's magnificent wings and he ran his hand through them, shifting them back into place, thereby soothing the archangel's upset grace.

Gabriel basked in the tender actions and it only seemed logical to send a tendril of his grace through the bond to brush Castiel's in appreciation.

Castiel closed his eyes in pleasure as the archangel continued to affectionately slide his grace over Cas' own and the younger angel latched onto the tendril, embracing it and filling Gabriel with a warm sense of love and fondness.

The archangel smiled and allowed more of his grace to meet with the seraph's and Castiel welcomed it, chasing it playfully and merging them together until they were a mess of blue and gold light.

Cas released his wings in bliss, never having experienced something so intimate with his own kind before and he gave all of himself to Gabriel, trusting the archangel to never harm him, to keep him safe when he was in such a vulnerable state. Gabriel's grace thrummed with protectiveness and a love far more intense than that usually shared between Heavenly brothers.

Castiel groaned softly and Gabriel leaned forwards, lips brushing his ear.

"Close the bonds," he whispered, voice strained and breathy and Cas immediately shut his bonds with Sam and Dean, before letting his grace lose on Gabriel's.

The archangel gasped, memories of his previous bonds before they had so painfully shattered resurfacing sharply. This was nothing like them.

Castiel's grace was nowhere near as bright as the other archangels' had been, but there was a respect and desperation for Gabriel found in Cas' grace that the other archangels' had never shown.

Cas was a little bit damaged and his grace was scarred with the mistakes and doubts of his past, but to Gabriel, it was perfect. He'd never experienced a bond where the participants were any less than completely confident in themselves and sure of their own place in the universe, but Cas wasn't any of that. He was a little broken and very uncertain of what the future held in store for Team Free Will, yet he didn't shy away from it. He was courageous and strong and knew he would stick with Sam, Dean and Gabriel through it all. 

Despite seeing Gabriel as his superior, the younger angel wasn't afraid of him. He was content to follow hierarchy and be comforted by Gabriel, but he wanted to offer the archangel love and protection in return, and that was something Gabriel craved. His last bonds had been so rigid; they all knew exactly what part they played in the relationship and the rest of the Universe, but this bond with Castiel was flexible. It could bend and shift and move depending on what the beings sharing it needed and Gabriel was excited to see it grow and flourish.

Castiel was staring at the archangel with so much unbridled love and need that Gabriel couldn't help but press his lips to the seraph's. It was a gesture of human tenderness he'd always enjoyed and if the way Cas had cupped his cheek was anything to go by, he took pleasure in it too.

He was surprised when Cas gently pushed against his chest, straddling him when his back hit the mattress, and Gabe's six wings fanned wide over the covers, despite them actually being able to ignore the physical presence of the bed if he so wished them to. But as Cas spread his hand over one of them, running the 'feathers' between his fingers, Gabriel knew he had made the right decision in leaving them be.

It all seemed so easy for Gabriel to just reach up and comb through one of Cas' dark wings, and the way the younger angel smiled against his mouth made the archangel's grace pulse more love and affection into the seraph's.

They just seemed to fit together; Cas' grace against Gabriel's, surrounding it, sliding through it, cradling it, all whilst being cradled and embraced, teased at and brushed.

Castiel pulled away from Gabriel's mouth to gaze at him, and the archangel automatically stroked his thumb over his mate's cheek.

"You are so beautiful, Castiel," murmured Gabe and he was rewarded with a pulse of embarrassment and humbled gratitude.

"Then I have no words to describe you," whispered Castiel quietly and Gabe beamed as he captured the younger angel's lips again.

It hadn't been like this with Michael, Lucifer and Raphael. They were all so sure of what they meant to each other, but here, hearing Castiel's awed words made him want to be close to the younger angel; to hold him in his wings and never let him go.

Castiel growled softly and Gabriel's grace received a reproachful poke.

"You're not theirs anymore," Cas huffed against Gabriel's lips and the archangel's eyebrows shot to his hairline. He had never considered the younger angel would be possessive of him. He fired a slither of interest into Cas' grace.

And received a blast of possessiveness in return.

Gabe smirked at the thrill of the unexpected turn and quickly assured the younger seraph that he belonged to him now, and Cas nuzzled his jaw, pleased. 

The seraph carded his fingers through Gabriel wings, moving to nuzzle at them when the archangel mewled in pleasure and Cas grinned when his mate returned the favour, caressing Cas' own wings with curious hands. He arched into Gabriel's gentle touch and the archangel chuckled joyfully.

He had never imagined he would find another willing mate, much less desire one himself, but Castiel was making it very clear that Gabriel was his and as the younger angel swamped Gabe's grace with want and affection, the archangel couldn't help but pull his new mate closer; to give everything he had to Cas in the way he swore he'd never do again.

Castiel was peppering kisses over his wings as he groomed them and despite it being a very human action, Gabriel adored it. He spread his wings a little wider to allow Cas more access and the seraph made a hum of approval as he tugged teasingly at a few feathers on one of the smaller wings.

Gabriel let his head fall back with a moan. It had been so long since he had been touched like this and after so many millennia assuming he would never experience it again, it was almost relieving to feel it once more. 

He whimpered in pleasure when Cas mouthed at one of his wings.

"Cas..." He groaned, eyes glowing dimly. Then he frowned at the trench coat hiding his mate's frame and began to paw at it.

He laughed when Castiel clicked his fingers with a smirk, ridding them both of their clothes and changing them into something decidedly softer and lighter, perfect for what they were doing.

"That's my thing," pouted Gabriel before snapping Castiel's boxers playfully, causing the seraph to startle. "Seriously? Bright orange?"

Castiel growled softly and pinned both hands against Gabriel wings, bunching up the 'feathers' beneath them. The archangel bucked upwards with a groan and Cas grinned as he claimed Gabriel's lips.

"I rather like you in red silk," murmured Cas and the archangel wrapped his arms around his mate, smoothing a hand down his bare back.

"Yeah, but you still look like a pumpkin," he snickered and Cas nipped at his bottom lip.

"Turn over," whispered the younger angel after a few minutes of lazy kissing and Gabriel ran his fingers through Castiel's hair.

"I want to touch you though," he murmured and Cas smiled as he shook his head.

"There will be plenty of time for that later. Let me groom you properly. I want to take care of you."

"You groomed me a couple of weeks ago," protested Gabriel, but his grace betrayed his eagerness at the younger angel's words. It had been a millennia since someone had stated they wanted to take care of him. In fact, it was his mates who had last said it.

"If you keep passing thoughts of your time with Michael, Lucifer and Raphael over our bond, I won't be responsible for my actions," said Castiel idly and Gabriel's wings flapped in unrestrained arousal at the images Castiel conjured of them both writhing against one another in their true forms, energy sparking and crackling all over the place as their entire beings collided and merged with one another. 

Then the seraph's thoughts changed and it was them in their human forms, grinding and moaning and touching one another in ways that would make even Dean blush. Gabriel decided that his innocent little mate had a very dirty imagination.

He loved it.

"Never pegged you as the possessive type," hummed Gabriel appreciatively as Cas rolled him onto his front, manoeuvring his six wings to where he wanted them to be.

"I have a habit of marking what's mine," growled Castiel close to his ear and the promise of that made the archangel shiver in anticipation.

It would explain the carvings on the Winchesters' ribs, the ones that informed him where they were at all times, and it would make sense of Dean's handprint when he was pulled out of hell. Cas had always considered the Winchesters to be his charges.

Gabriel was pulled out of his musings when Cas raked his hands through the archangel's wings, pulsing desire and need through the huge appendages and Gabriel keened in desperation, arching upwards in an effort to get closer to his mate.

Cas chuckled and kneeled over the archangel, keeping his hips pinned between his thighs as he continued to groom Gabriel, mercilessly pouring tender emotions across their bond and through Gabe's wings.

Gabriel was torn between flipping their positions and getting revenge for Castiel's pleasurable torture, or staying where he was and enjoying the younger angel's hands on him, and he finally settled on remaining put, tiny whimpers of bliss escaping his throat.

Cas seemed to be taking great delight in tending to Gabriel wings and the seraph was meticulous in his work as he made sure to touch every single 'feather'; every single glimmer of liquid gold. He manipulated them and shifted them, pushing his fingers deep between them until he was buried deep in their energies and by then, Gabriel was groaning filthily, whining Cas' name as the wings flexed invitingly beneath the younger angel's hands.

The seraph began to knead the wings, starting with the larger wings and slowly working his way down to the smaller limbs, massaging all the stress and and upset out of Gabriel's being, and when two hours had passed, Gabriel was nothing but a quivering wreck beneath his mate's body.

"Gabe?" Whispered Cas as he mouthed kisses along the older angel's neck and shoulders and Gabriel made a choked sound that could have been taken as acknowledgement.

"Are you alright?" Cas murmured, sounding somewhat concerned that he'd broken the archangel and Gabriel made a hum of approval as his wings shook at receiving so much attention.

Castiel trailed lazy patters across one of the largest ones and Gabriel closed his eyes as his brain tried to make sense of the moevements.

There was the Enochian symbol for _'protection'_ and another for _'love'_ , and Gabriel couldn't take such wonderful feelings any longer as he smoothly flipped their positions until Cas was smiling up at him in amusement, wings fanned wide in offering for the archangel.

Gabriel sweetly captured his mate's lips and began to repay Castiel for his care to his wings.

It was the early hours of the morning when they finally finished; that point when the stars have vanished but the sun can't quite bring itself to rise above the horizon.

Cas curled into Gabriel, the archangel's wings embracing him protectively as Cas idly stroked the nearest one, his own wings at rest behind his back, brushing Gabriel's.

They hadn't done anything considered erotic by human standards, but grace sharing was definitely an intimacy far greater than sex. Trusting someone with your entire being, your very life and being trusted in return was far more satisfying than any hot bout of sex. Although Gabriel had to admit, Castiel's grooming of his wings had felt like an episode of Casa Erotica.

Now, they were content to rest in one another's arms, to lie close to each other and trade affectionate kisses as the reality of what had just happened between them set in.

Gabriel ran his hand over a dark wing. 

"If you'd have told me when I first showed up here, that in two years we'd be mated and I'd be struggling to keep the windows and lights from shattering every time I groaned from the touch of your hands, I'd have thought the apocalypse had begun." He paused. _"Oh wait."_

Castiel quirked a grin as he snuggled closer to the archangel's warmth.

"I would have probably assumed you were a Trickster or something." He chuckled as Gabriel gently smacked his head with a wing. 

"Don't you start sassing me, fledgling," growled Gabriel playfully and Cas smiled at the pet name, nuzzling the archangel's throat in approval.

Gabriel's expression grew fond as he held the younger angel closer. A few minutes passed before he spoke, but his voice was suddenly hesitant, uncertain.

"If Sam and Dean came to us willingly, would you... would you consider taking them?"

Cas blinked before glancing up at the archangel. He shifted until they could comfortably look at one another.

"Only if they truly wanted us, in mind and soul... why?"

Gabriel shook his head, looking confused. "I thought... when Missouri originally told us of our attraction to them, I didn't believe her. I assumed there had been a mistake." He gazed into Cas' curious eyes. "But I thought that about you, too. I thought there was no way I could have desired another angel after all that's happened... and yet here I am. And I actually _enjoy_ wanting you," he smiled in disbelief before his expression grew serious again. "And the more I think about you and the more I think about them..."

"The more you begin to wonder if you desire them as flock members," finished Cas knowingly and Gabriel tilted his head in a manner similar to the younger angel.

"Do you...?"

"The thought has crossed my mind before," murmured Castiel. "I have considered it of you too," he confessed.

He was startled by Gabriel's wings puffing up and he snapped his gaze to the archangel to find him staring at Cas with warm, loving eyes.

"Are you preening?" Asked Castiel, a smile tugging at his lips and Gabriel ducked his head in embarrassment even though his wings refused to drop.

"Maybe a little," he admitted. "It's a great compliment, for you to still want me despite knowing I've had previous mates and that those bonds shattered in such a horrific way."

Cas scowled as he placed a possessive hand over Gabriel's arm.

"I thought I'd already made it quite clear how much I want you, Gabriel." His expression softened. "If you are willing to have me as your mate, I promise you our bond will never break. I will never hurt you and I will never turn against you, brother."

Gabriel cupped Cas' cheek and pressed their lips together, filling the other angel's grace with _love_ and _awe_ and _appreciation._

"Mine," Gabriel mouthed against Cas' lips and the younger angel smiled and allowed the archangel to push him onto his back.

When they pulled apart, Gabriel rested his head on Cas' chest, listening to his vessel's heartbeat, smirking at how his mate had chosen to keep it going. Cas' arms slipped around him along with his wings, and Gabriel shifted his own wings until they were enveloping Cas' frame and the long black appendages with it.

"They would be perfect mates," murmured Gabriel quietly and Cas hummed in agreement. "Dean's so loyal and protective. A little strong-headed at times, but brave and caring, even if he pretends he's not."

Castiel nodded. "And Sam is so kind and intelligent. It's a shame he holds such little self-worth when his heart is so large."

Gabriel shook his head. "Low self-esteem seems to be a Winchester special."

Cas was silent for a moment. "I don't think we can comment on that," he said slowly and Gabriel snapped his mouth shut.

"No use in dwelling on _'could-have's'_ ," sighed Gabriel as Cas reached over to toy with a wing. Then he smiled. "I'm more than happy with this," he whispered as he placed a kiss on Cas' bare chest.

Castiel chuckled as he stroked the wing tenderly.

"I'm still having a difficult time believing how easy this was."

Gabriel grinned. "I know. I feel like I've been cheated out of the whole tripping over sentences, dry throat, hesitant meeting of lips, followed by fumbling to rip one another's clothes off, tumbling into bed and _hot, steamy sex._ "

Castiel snorted. "You've been reading far too much porn."

"I believe the correct term is _'fanfiction'_."

Cas frowned. "Metatron wasn't too fond of that form of literature either."

A devilish smirk crawled across Gabriel's face. "Great! I can show you some. Humans have such wonderful imaginations."

Cas rolled his eyes just as footsteps were heard passing his room.

"Once again, Gabriel, I'm not that naive." He placed a chaste kiss to Gabriel's hair before shoving the archangel off the bed, prompting him to yelp in surprise.

"Thought you said you'd never hurt me," pouted Gabriel as he made a show of rubbing his backside from his position on the floor.

Cas swung his legs over the edge of the mattress and hauled the other angel to his feet. "Apologies, all-powerful, light-bringing, Archangel of Justice. Did you fall off the bed?"

Gabe stuck out his tongue. "I liked you better as a helpless fledging."

"I thought you said at one time you were worried this fledgling would destroy an active volcano?"

The archangel batted him with a wing. 

"Weren't you ever taught to respect your elders?"

"I could obtain a walking stick if you'd like?"

Castiel had never been chased out of a room by an archangel before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It finally happened! That's Cas and Gabe down, we just have to wait for Sam and Dean to move it along.
> 
> By the way, if you've not watched the video of Richard Speight Jr. talking about finding a pair of bright orange underwear in his trailer, then working out that they were actually given to Misha by a fan, I suggest you take a few minutes to watch that brilliant mess of confusion.
> 
> Tell me what you think! :)


	8. Chapter 8

When Castiel and Gabriel joined the Winchesters for breakfast that morning (not to eat but rather to just sit and chat as they often did), Sam and Dean exchanged meaningful glances as soon as they took their seats.

Both angels ignored it. They'd become accustomed to the almost-telepathic manner of communication the brothers used whenever they were trying to keep something between themselves. Considering both Cas and Gabe possessed the _actual_ ability of telepathy, neither could comment upon it.

Besides, they were too busy marvelling at how their bond had strengthened so immensely after the evening's activities. They couldn't seem to keep their graces away from one another as they continued to explore the thickened bond, teasing at each other every so often.

About half way through his bacon sandwich, Sam cleared his throat.

"So... did you two have a good night?"

Dean choked on a crust and Sam's face held a glimmer of amusement as he flicked his gaze to the angels.

Gabriel was glancing suspiciously between the pair as Castiel raised a wary eyebrow. 

"It was... enjoyable. Yes."

Dean downed his cup of coffee in one go as Sam nodded in acknowledgement.

"...Good," said the younger Winchester, voice a tone higher than usual.

Breakfast continued.

"So when people talk about the 'mile-high club'..."

Dean surged forwards, thumping his chest as he struggled to suck in air during his abrupt coughing fit.

"Sam!" He hissed when he finally cleared his oesophagus and the younger Winchester's mouth was attempting to break out into a sly grin.

Castiel's eyes were wide, face flushed as Gabriel explained what the _'mile-high club'_ was over their bond. The archangel seemed to be struggling to hold back his own snickers.

"Who do you think invented the saying?" Smirked Gabriel, wiggling his eyebrows and Sam huffed out a laugh as Dean held his head in his hands, groaning exasperatedly.

"You two felt some of that, huh?" Gabriel asked when he realised neither human seemed inclined to douse him in Holy oil.

"Next time, could you close the bonds _before_ you start groping each other rather than _during_?" Grumbled Dean and it was a shame neither Winchester could see Castiel's wings flapping frantically in humiliation in their own plane of reality. It made Gabriel laugh anyway.

Taking pity on the mortified seraph, Gabriel unleashed his own wings into that same plane that humans couldn't see (and probably wouldn't want to considering viewing part of angel's true form would burn their retinas) and slid the great wings around his mate's shoulder.

"I think Cas did very well considering that was his first time closing the bonds," defended Gabe. "I'm surprised they didn't fly open when he orgasmed. Multiple times. Our graces merged and my hands buried deep in his wings."

Dean was wearing a sort-of constipated expression and his eyeballs looked as though they would pop out of his head any second as Gabriel smirked coyly at him.

Castiel had his face buried in Gabriel's neck, wings twitching embarrassedly as thoughts of the ground swallowing him up passed over their bond, causing Gabriel to chuckle.

Sam however, was watching the air behind Castiel in rapt fascination and Gabriel followed his gaze to find him staring at the spot where Castiel's wings were fidgeting in the other plane of reality. He lifted an intrigued eyebrow. Surely Sam couldn't see the energy of Castiel's wings? He'd have been blinded by now.

Yet the younger Winchester's eyes were tracking the movements of the wings, not all that accurately mind you, but still...

"Great," groused Dean. "I'm gonna go... take a shower. Or duck my head in some bleach."

Just as he stood from the table, Castiel peered at him through nervous eyes.

"Does it... do we bother you?" He asked quietly and even Gabriel's smile faded as he glanced at Dean almost anxiously.

Sam frowned reproachfully at his brother, but Dean ignored him as he sat back down.

"You mean you guys having a romp in the hay? No, why would it? I mean it's a little unexpected, but who am I to deny you whatever happiness you can get from today's world?"

Gabriel and Castiel blinked, stunned at the sincerity in Dean's voice and even Sam looked impressed.

Dean glanced at the surprised faces and rolled his eyes. "I'm not the Grinch y'know. You can bang whoever you want. I'm in no position to judge," he grinned wolfishly and Sam snorted.

Gabriel and Castiel tried to smile back, but their attempts fell flat as something unexpectedly jealous and possessive reared its ugly head in the bottom of their guts, and their expressions came off more as grimaces.

Dean frowned. "I'm serious. You two deserve some good after everything you've done for us; for the world. Lock yourselves in your room all day if you want - we haven't got any cases so it'll just be research on Amara. Consummate your bond, or whatever... just don't let us feel it too." He winced and this time both angels really did manage a grateful smile.

"Thanks, Dean," said Gabriel genuinely and the hunter nodded gruffly as he used his coffee cup as a distraction to prevent the atmosphere from getting too emotional, only to realise there was no coffee left in his cup from downing it earlier.

Sam watched the pathetic display of manliness before shaking his head.

"Not like you need our permission to court each other or whatever, anyway," he muttered and Cas tilted his head.

"No, but it would be nice to have your blessing. Especially considering the uniqueness of our... situation."

"Like I said; no groping unless the bonds are sealed," huffed Dean before standing once more. "Knock yourselves out; figuratively and literally," he tossed over his shoulder as he made his way to the bathroom.

When he'd vanished, Sam turned to both angels with a warm smile.

"You should do as he says. Take the day off. Forget about the rest of the world for a little while. You both deserve to be looked after."

 _'So do you,'_ Gabriel almost said, but he restrained himself just in time. Cas' brief glance towards him told him the other angel had heard it through their bond though. Good thing they'd both shut the links to the Winchesters.

"Thank you, Sam. You don't know how much that means to us," replied Cas and the young hunter grinned back, although a flash of... _something_ , darted behind his eyes but it was gone too quickly to identify.

"Have fun, you two," chuckled Sam as he left them alone in the kitchen, dumping his and Dean's plates in the sink as he vacated the room.

Gabriel turned to his mate. 

"Well I guess we don't have to worry about telling them now, huh?"

 

* * *

 

It had been over a week since Gabriel and Castiel had gravitated towards each other and like Dean, Sam had caught them a number of occasions in rather intimate positions; nothing provocative, but enough to make Sam lower his gaze and feel a pang of longing in his heart.

He had first felt such acute pricks of loneliness when he had caught the pair in the library together and it had only progressed from there. 

He didn't like to intrude, but the last couple of days, he'd found himself staring a little too long at the pair as they shared sweet kisses or gentle touches of affection. When they whispered tender words into one another's ears, Sam found himself closing his eyes, wishing he could have something like that with someone; to feel as though he was wanted and cared for in a way that Jess had once offered him.

When Gabriel placed a grounding hand on Cas' shoulder or Castiel interlaced their fingers together, Sam found his own hand flexing, searching for something similar.

Then there were the fond kisses Cas placed on Gabriel's jaw, or the loving kisses Gabe peppered across the back of Cas' neck; slow and deliberate and meaningful. Those were the types of kisses Sam had to look away from.

He, too, had been shocked by Missouri's revelation of their attraction to one another, but as time passed, Sam began to realise that maybe her words hadn't been so far-fetched after all.

Besides his brother, there was no one Sam trusted more than Cas and Gabe, and it was true that he would do anything for them, even if it meant risking his life. When Dean had snapped at the pair in the psychic's home, Sam had felt a surge of fury at his brother's words, ready to defend the angels even if it meant falling out with his brother. He had never experienced that with anyone else other than Jessica; the need to defend them against a family member he held so dear to his heart. 

He hadn't thought about it much at the time as he considered Gabriel and Cas to be his brothers as well, but afterwards, he began to ponder what _exactly_ it was that he'd felt at Dean's disturbing words. He was shocked to realise it wasn't the desire to defend his friends' dignities and names, but the soul-deep need to protect his mates from any hurtful words which could cause them emotional harm.

Which was weird considering humans didn't have _'mates'_.

But Sam had enjoyed spending time with Gabriel and Castiel in the past, learning about their culture and hierarchy. He had spent countless hours chatting and discussing the differences between humans and angels and despite all this, he knew there was so much more to learn about them, like bonding for example.

And Sam _wanted_ to learn more about them; he wanted to get to know Gabe and Cas better, to understand all they'd been through since they were first created, to see what they'd seen and hear what they'd heard. He wanted to get to know them as angels and be able to understand exactly what soul and grace bonding really entailed and meant to the pair and their culture.

He wanted to prove that he could protect and care for the angels just as much as they had him.

It was a daunting idea, especially for Sam, who knew he could never compare to the beauty of an angel. He was merely _'The boy with demon blood'._

Cas and Gabe would never want him.

Still, whenever the pair opened up the bonds to share their emotions or to soothe his nightmares (and he hadn't been ignorant to how many occasions he'd felt their links flare with comfort and calm when he was battling hellish dreams), he felt honoured and humbled. The fact that they trusted him enough to leave a part of themselves vulnerable to Sam was jaw-dropping. 

It was a Winchester trait to find it difficult to trust and put faith in others, and after Jessica had died, the only person Sam had been willing to depend upon was his brother, and sometimes even that wavered. But now, with Castiel and Gabriel so deeply ingrained into their lives, Sam hadn't been all that surprised to find himself putting as much value into the angels' words as he did Dean's. He could rely on Cas and Gabe and know they would do all they could to fulfil expectations without putting either Winchester at risk.

It was relieving being able to open up around them.

He hoped Cas and Gabe felt the same way about him.

Sam shook his head to clear his thoughts. It would do no good him projecting such ideas across the bonds. At first, it had scared him how content he was around the angels, but now, even with the bonds between them, he found himself grateful for how relaxed he was when they were near. However, it did present a problem when he was trying to keep his thoughts to himself, as the more relaxed he was around them, the easier it was for the bonds to share his emotions. 

He made his way to the library, hoping to distract his aching heart and overworked mind with a good book. It was eleven in the evening and Dean was outside, retuning the Impala's engine and Sam refused to do research on Amara when it was all he'd done all day, with nothing to show for it.

He was just about to round an aisle when he heard a soft groan and he froze, cautiously avoiding interacting with the bonds.

He peeked his head around the corner to ensure it was what he thought it was and not a monster making strange noises to lure him out, and his face flushed at what he saw.

Gabriel had Castiel pinned against one of the book cases, hands seemingly fisting the air either side of the younger angel as he scraped his teeth hotly over Cas' throat.

Cas whimpered, writhing against the shelves, and Sam wondered if Gabriel really was grasping air or something else entirely.

The archangel clawed his fingers through the air and Cas' head hit the bookshelf as he bit his lip to stop himself from making too much noise.

Gabriel smirked against the younger angel's throat before moving to ravish Cas' mouth, at which point Cas scrambled frantically at Gabriel's back, trying to find something to hold on to.

The logical part of Sam's brain told him to leave; to give the angels their alone time and find something else to entertain himself with. But a different part of Sam was telling him to stay and watch, to find out what was making Cas act so desperately when Gabriel didn't actually seem to be doing all that much.

Gabriel's right hand tugged on the air and Cas moaned into his mouth as his grip tightened around the archangel. Gabriel then spread his hand wide and thrust it into the air sharply, causing Castiel to pull away from his mouth with a deep groan.

Sam refused to admit to himself how much his own body had reacted at the noise. He decided it was time to leave, but just as he made to turn, a flash of black caught his attention.

He glanced back to the pair, face still heated and raised an eyebrow when the air under Gabriel's hand turned black and... _flowed_ like liquid. After a second, it disappeared again. He tilted his head.

"Gabriel..." Moaned Cas breathily and the archangel nipped at his jaw in reprimand.

"Quiet, fledgling. Don't want them to hear us," he whispered and Sam realised his bonds with them were completely sealed.

Cas snapped his mouth shut, arching towards his mate as Gabriel flexed his fingers and drove them into the air again, claiming Cas' lips once more.

Sam gulped. Were two angels allowed to be this erotic? He stifled a gasp as the air under Gabe's hand morphed to black once more, and this time, it wasn't just a flash.

The patch of darkness beneath Gabriel's fingers moved and shifted with the light, ebbing and flowing as outlines started to appear. Outlines of _feathers._

Sam watched in awe as the 'feathers' tinted deep purples, blues and greens like a raven's each time they shifted under Gabriel's grip, and Sam couldn't tear his gaze away as he realised he was staring at a part of Cas' wings.

"Do you have any idea what you do to me?" Whispered Gabriel against Cas' mouth and the younger angel moved a hand to tangle in his mate's hair.

"You are so beautiful, so passionate... what did I do to deserve you?" Continued Gabriel and Cas cupped Gabriel's cheek as he pressed their lips together for something a little more tender.

Sam felt his mouth go dry. He had said things like that to Jess. Hearing the angels whisper words like that reinforced just how lonely Sam was; how much his heart ached at not having anyone to heal the hurt he'd suffered through over the last decade or so. He wanted someone to need him, to murmur words of affection in his ear as though he wasn't merely a damaged screw-up, tainted by demon blood and years spent in Hell. _The unclean boy who helped break the world._

He closed his eyes. What made him think he deserved someone who loved him? After all he'd done, all the deaths he'd caused, why on Earth would he believe he would be allowed something so selfish as a person who wanted him?

"I'm going to claim you tonight, fledgling," murmured Gabriel, tone confident and possessive as Cas took a shaky breath. "I'm going to claim every part of you in every way possible until we're both exhausted and sore," continued the archangel and Sam caught a flash of gold moving towards Castiel. Gabriel's wings.

Cas closed his eyes contentedly and Sam had a feeling Gabriel had just wrapped the younger angel up in his wings as he mouthed at Cas' jaw.

"You are mine and I want every angel in Heaven and upon the Earth to know that," growled Gabriel quietly and Cas melted against his mate's chest, face buried into his neck as Gabriel continued to manipulate black wings.

Sam tried to stop his body from reacting to both the display and Gabriel's words, but it proved futile. He had thought seeing these particular angels touching one another would be awkward, wrong somehow, but the more he watched, the more he realised how far off that prediction had been. 

He wasn't even jealous; he was happy Gabriel and Castiel had found something good for themselves in each other, and he wanted them to be able to heal each other's pain and be able to seek one another out when they needed comfort.

But he wanted to be a part of it too.

He wanted to soothe and be soothed, to care for and be cared for himself. The connections to their warm and bright graces didn't help either. Although they were closed at the moment, the thought that technically, he was their mate, was enough to send pangs of want and need straight to his heart and brain. 

It was a startlingly sharp revelation and arousal blossomed through his chest. He desired these two angels he'd grown close enough to to call family. He wanted to touch them and be touched by them and he wanted to please them. He wanted to kiss them and tell them how much they meant to him; to tell them how much they were needed and, dare he say it, _loved._

He wanted them to come to him when they were in needed of comfort and he wanted to be able to return to them if he needed the same. He wanted them to share their concerns and troubles with him, just as much as he wanted to go to them. He wanted them to share their joy and laughter with him, their smiles and affection.

But most of all, he wanted them to be happy. 

And they would never be happy with him. He was too broken, tainted. _An abomination._

He brushed away a stray tear.

"Let go, little one. I've got you," murmured Gabriel softly as Cas took a shuddering breath, relaxing fully into his mate's hold, and both their eyes began to glow their respective gold and blue, their skin seeming to radiate gentle light. 

Sam wondered if this is what it looked like when angels merged their graces completely. 

"I love you, Gabriel," whispered Castiel and the archangel stiffened before tugging the younger angel into a fierce kiss, full of desperate need and wonder. Cas kissed back just as eagerly and Sam had to close his eyes when their bodies began to glow so brightly his skull throbbed and pressure began to build behind his retinas.

He fled the room to the sound of his own heart cracking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added another chapter because Sam hasn't had much focus yet. Hope you enjoyed self-depreciating Sam.


	9. Chapter 9

A curse tumbled from Dean's lips as the plate he had been drying shattered on the tiled floor. He gripped the kitchen counter to steady himself and in his irritation, shoved a burst of annoyance through his remaining bonds. 

He received two ginger pulses of apology in return and had to close his eyes when that odd part of his brain insisted he was playing with fire by being mated to the two angels. 

And it wasn't just his mind and part of his soul anymore that were insisting he was committing a crime by being mated; his heart had also begun to join the party. He spent most of his time with the bonds firmly closed but on the rare occasion he forgot, it was a shock to feel when Cas and Gabe grew overly passionate with one another.

Like now.

It wasn't that he just didn't want to feel them getting amorous with one another; if that were the case he was sure he would be annoyed, but there wouldn't be that streak of aggressiveness in him when he slammed the bonds closed, making both Cas and Gabe wince in the process.

Feeling intense emotions from the angels physically hurt him.

It was concerning, considering he knew for a fact that Sam never felt any constricting pains in his chest, or sharp migraines from the bonds, but the more emotion and thoughts he received from the angels, the worse the pain became. 

It was as though strengthening the bonds was tearing his heart and soul in two.

He wasn't sure how long he could stand the hurt anymore. Every fibre of his being was at war with itself, some parts telling him he should be excited by the bonds and others telling him he should break them immediately.

Then there was that annoying tug in his heart that lead... _somewhere_. He just wasn't quite sure where. It definitely opposed the bonds though.

He couldn't keep dealing with this though; this feeling that he was going to be ripped in half every time his bonds so much as twitched. He needed to get rid of them _now_.

Besides, he was certain Gabriel and Castiel would want their privacy now; they wouldn't be fond of having two humans tagging along on their mating bond. They should be able to explore their own connection without having to worry about Sam and Dean's thoughts on the matter. 

He understood Gabriel had meant well when he was discussing the pros of them being tied together so deeply, but that had been before the two angels had hooked up; his ideas may have changed now but he just didn't want to say anything to Sam and Dean because he felt as though the bonds offered them protection, and he didn't want them to think he didn't care about them anymore.

That, and Gabriel was about as emotionally constipated as Dean himself was.

Still, Dean found the bonds to be more of a nuisance than an advantage and he was pretty confident that Sam would feel the same now he could also feel the two angels' feelings for one another.

With his mind made up, Dean waited for an hour before approaching Castiel and Gabriel with his thoughts. He didn't want to walk in on them (yet again) when they were in the middle of something. He dragged his brother along for the impromptu meeting and knocked hesitantly on Gabriel's door.

"Come in," hummed Gabriel softly and both brothers padded in, relieved when they realised both angels had their clothes on.

Cas was perched in Gabriel's lap, a small, contented smile lighting his face as, unbeknownst to the Winchesters, Gabriel's wings arced protectively around him. They were sitting in a cosy-looking arm chair that looked to be one of the archangel's creations and the older angel had his hand splayed between the younger's shoulder blades; dead centre of where Sam knew the bases of Cas' wings resided.

The younger Winchester couldn't help the tiny, knowing smile creeping across his face.

Cas lifted his eyebrow but refused to ask about it. He just wanted to get back to grooming Gabriel's magnificent wings.

All eyes turned to Dean, curious as to why they were all in Gabriel's room in the first place.

"You guys should be able to have your privacy without worrying about what a couple of humans are feeling," began Dean, uncomfortable with the prospect of yet another emotional talk. He seemed to be having a lot of those recently.

Sam's smile faltered and both angels tilted their heads slightly.

"If you want us to have privacy, then why are you standing in my room, Dean-o?" Asked Gabriel, tightening his grip on his lover as he felt a pulse of uncertainty from Cas' end of the bond.

Dean scrunched up his face. "I'm talking about the bonds," he said finally, his body in too much turmoil to beat around the bush. "You've been together for four weeks now. Surely you don't want us intruding." It wasn't a question, but a statement; Dean wasn't giving either angel a choice in the matter.

Cas shifted uncomfortably. Gabriel looked hesitant.

"You're not intruding," the archangel settled on finally, an almost anxious look behind his eyes.

Dean shook his head with a snort. "I'm not here to complain about you two being in a relationship," he said, rolling his eyes when both angels seemed to relax marginally. Still, there was an undercurrent of wariness about them, but at least he'd soothed some of their concerns.

"I was thinking Sam and I should cut our connections to you, before they get too strong. You two should be able to do what you like with each other without having to concentrate on whether we're feeling any of it."

It had the opposite effect of what he was hoping for. Both angels tensed for a second before forcing themselves to relax. Castiel's gaze flicked over to Sam, who was looking more and more defeated by the second. The seraph tilted his head curiously.

"...Is that what you want, Dean?" Asked Gabriel in an uncharacteristic show of seriousness and Dean wrinkled his nose.

"I would've thought that's what you want. Do you really want a couple of tag-alongs on your mating bond?"

Gabriel seemed to look past Dean for a moment before slowly shaking his head in agreement. For some reason, Dean thought it felt like a hollow victory.

"In case you've forgotten: we can't break the bonds," said Sam, sounding irritated, but he wouldn't meet Dean or either angel's gazes. 

"Maybe we've just not been to the right person," shrugged Dean and this time Sam did glance up. He looked upset.

Dean decided to ask him about it later.

"Rowena's a powerful witch. I'm pretty sure she could break the bonds. I'm surprised we didn't think of her sooner."

Suddenly, Gabriel looked furious as he tugged Castiel further against his chest and the younger angel radiated annoyance himself. Even Sam was staring at Dean as though he thought his brother was an idiot.

"You can't be serious?" Ground out Gabriel and Dean was honestly lost.

"I know we haven't had the best history with her-"

"'Best history'? She almost killed Cas!" Spat Gabriel, fire behind his eyes. "She's attempted to kill you! Multiple times! If you think for one second I'm going to let her anywhere near my flock then maybe your head needs screwing on straight!"

Both Sam and Dean's eyes widened at the slip and Cas' head whipped around to stare at his brother in shock.

Gabriel look confused for a moment, but Sam's whispered _"Flock?"_ was enough to make him duck his head in shame.

Suddenly, Dean felt irritated about this whole ordeal as certain parts of his body told him his strengthening links with the angels were very wrong.

"We're not your flock. We never were. The bonds were an accident and whilst I'm happy you and Cas got something out of it, don't presume me and Sam want in," growled Dean and Gabriel's head lowered even further. Surprisingly, Castiel narrowed his gaze.

"You've made your point, Dean. We'll think about it. Don't take this too far."

He placed a protective hand over Gabriel's shoulder and Dean thought it looked rather like a claim. He scowled at the sharp pain in his heart he was accustomed to feeling whenever he thought about the bonds.

" _'We'll think about it'_ isn't good enough. I need to know whether you're going to allow Rowena to break the bonds or whether you're going to keep us tied to you despite the fact we're unwilling."

It was a low blow, but Dean was in pain from the bonds and he didn't want to keep them any longer than he had to.

Sam shifted as though he had something to say, but he kept his opinions a secret and Cas' mouth drew into a thin line.

"Do you even know where Rowena is?"

Dean crossed his arms in challenge. "Crowley does."

Castiel glared back at him. "Fine," he huffed. "If this is what you both want then we have no power to stop you."

Sam winced but Dean didn't notice as he stalked out of the room.

"Great!" He snapped. "We can all have some peace a quiet and not be part of some twisted angel orgy."

The door slammed behind him, leaving Sam alone with the two angels.

Cas wanted to ask about Sam's resulting grimace, but he held his tongue when the human wouldn't look at him. Wordlessly, Sam made a hasty retreat.

There was a moment of silence before Gabriel sighed quietly.

"I never meant to say that."

Cas frowned as he glanced at his mate. "Yes, you did."

Gabriel stiffened and pulled his wings away from the younger angel, folding them behind his back until they were no longer visible in any dimension.

"I'm sorry, alright? It was a slip of the tongue. Don't you start getting snappy with me too," scowled Gabriel as his hand slid off Cas' back.

The seraph rolled his eyes in a way that reminded Gabriel of Dean.

"You consider them to be your flock," stated Cas as he met the archangel's gaze. "You don't accidentally say something like that unless you mean it."

Gabriel crossed his arms. "Get off," he huffed, suddenly feeling trapped beneath Cas' weight.

"No," said Castiel firmly and Gabriel sent a burst of aggravation through their bond.

Cas responded immediately with his own pulse of impatience.

"It is nothing to be ashamed of," the seraph commented, gaze softening. "You have no reason to be defensive."

"Is there a point to this?" Snapped Gabriel.

He was surprised by the tendrils of comfort and calming snaking through the bond.

"Yes," said Castiel quietly. "You're forgetting I can feel how scared you are of being rejected. You have spent so long on your own; so many millennia keeping yourself distanced from others. I know how much the word _'flock'_ means to you, brother; you don't use the term lightly."

Gabriel shifted uncomfortably. "Get off," he said again, tensing when Cas' wings slid around him.

"But you must remember we are not Michael, Lucifer or Raphael," murmured the seraph as if Gabriel had never spoken. "We will never reject you or hurt you as they did."

Gabriel squirmed. "Dean's words sounded a lot like a rejection to me," he mumbled eventually.

Cas quirked a smile as his wings curled more securely around his mate.

"Only of the bonds; not of you." He gently cupped Gabriel's cheek to force him to meet his gaze. "It might not seem like it sometimes, but Dean cares deeply for all of us. He reminds me a lot of you, actually. He doesn't label just anyone his family, yet you have managed to earn that title."

The seraph shook his head sadly as his hand slid from Gabriel's face and the archangel immediately missed the contact.

"I don't know why he's so averse to the bonds; maybe he's frightened of letting others see the most vulnerable parts of himself, or maybe he doesn't believe he's worth caring about." Gabriel averted his gaze when Cas eyed him pointedly. "But don't think for one second that Dean doesn't want you here. He would be devastated if you left." The seraph lowered his voice to a murmur. "As would I."

Gabriel whimpered quietly in rare show of insecurity and Cas immediately pulled his head to his chest and held him close.

"Give him time," whispered Cas as he pressed a kiss to his mate's head. "If he wishes to break the bonds, we must let him. He may never truly love us as mates, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't be open to being a part of your flock if he understood more about what that means."

Gabriel nuzzled his lover's neck as he wrapped his arms around him and he gently pressed his grace through the bond towards Cas'. The seraph quickly allowed them to merge, embracing Gabriel's grace warmly. 

"Don't ever assume you're not wanted here. You are loved and needed and I hate it when you believe no one cares because that is so far from the truth."

"You can't teach an old dog new tricks, I guess," muttered Gabriel and Cas huffed as he swamped his mate's grace with _love_ and _need_ , leaning in to capture the archangel's lips.

"We are not your old mates. We will never turn you away," growled Cas against the other angel's mouth and Gabriel clutched at his lover's back in a desperate attempt to pull him closer.

After a few minutes of frantic kissing, Cas pulled back to nuzzle at Gabriel's jaw.

"You know, if you truly had wanted me to get off your lap, you could have easily overpowered me," he commented knowingly and Gabriel buried his face into the younger angel's neck with a huff.

"I've spent enough time on my own," he mumbled embarrassedly and Cas pulsed more affection through their bond.

"You don't have to anymore."

"Thank you," whispered Gabriel gratefully, voice hitching at the end as he held Castiel tighter. Then the archangel felt a surge of protectiveness surround his grace and he couldn't choke back the sob that fell from his lips. He'd been alone for so long, it was foreign to be taken care of by one of his own kind, and a younger angel at that.

Golden wings were once again unleashed and Cas made a point of carding his fingers through them, making sure to touch every part of them he could reach, mingling his grace with their energies until Gabriel had literally been marked by Cas' touch. A hint of blue swirled about the normally golden wings and Gabriel basked in the feeling of being wanted as he peppered kisses over Castiel's face.

"Not every Winchester seems to be averse to the bonds," Cas mumbled after a few moments and Gabriel paused to stare at his lover.

"Sam? He left the room pretty quickly afterwards."

Cas hummed thoughtfully. "Maybe, but he didn't look too happy when Dean mentioned breaking the bonds. Actually, he looked rather upset."

Gabriel thought carefully about Sam's expressions during the whole confrontation.

"He wanted to say something, but didn't," he said slowly. "When Dean started talking about them being unwilling to keep the bonds." He blinked at Cas. "You don't think...?"

Cas shook his head. "I don't know what to think. I don't want to get my hopes up either, but I must admit he was acting... _strangely._ "

Gabriel's voice was controlled but it was clear he was excited by their observations. 

"I suppose we should keep an eye on him? To make sure he isn't uncomfortable or keeping important secrets."

Cas lifted a reproachful eyebrow. "Gabriel..."

The archangel's face softened. "I won't get my hopes up too high. I promise." He stole a chaste kiss. "As I've already said: having you is more than enough."

The seraph chuckled as he leaned in for something a little deeper.

"I want him too."

"Even if it's just as part of the flock," murmured Gabe. "I think we'd be good for him, and he for us."

"It's time he knew someone cares for him as much as he cares for everyone else," agreed Castiel. "Even if it isn't with romantic intent."

Gabriel toyed with a few of Cas' 'feathers'. It was comforting to touch another angel in this way, especially when this particular angel loved him so deeply.

"Although I do wonder if it's true what they say about men with big feet," grinned Gabriel wolfishly and Castiel snorted as he stood from the other angel's lap.

"And on that note-"

Gabriel didn't give him a chance to finish as he yanked the younger angel into his lap again and lavished him with wet, noisy kisses. Castiel couldn't help but laugh as he flapped his wings in an attempt to dislodge his attacker and when Gabriel buried his hands in the huge appendages, the seraph melted against him.

"I think I need some stress relief after such an emotional discussion," purred Gabriel lowly and Cas shivered before something possessive and feral glinted behind his eyes.

Gabriel didn't utter a word for the next hour.

...Nothing coherent anyway.

 

* * *

 

Sam didn't want to break the bonds. He was confident enough to admit that to himself at least. He didn't want to lose something that had brought him so much comfort and peace when his dreams had turned less than pleasant.

When the visions of the Cage had begun, Castiel and Gabriel's interference with his distressed soul had been a blessing; he had actually managed to get some sleep despite his traumatised mind. To sever the bonds now would be to sentence himself to restless nights and exhausting days. He would be stuck with his own tormented thoughts and self-loathing, and there would be no reprieve from the terrible nightmares and memories of what he'd already suffered at the hands of Lucifer and Hell.

Maybe it was selfish of him, but he needed Gabriel and Cas to help him get through the torture. He needed them to soothe and reassure; to know that there were some people who still cared for him.

He needed the light of their graces to keep away the darkness in his soul.

And maybe he was lonely. Maybe he'd grown used to being able to feel both angels and the prospect of losing that was like sending him back to complete isolation. He didn't want to cut the connections to the two people he was only just beginning to figure out he possibly didn't only see as _brothers._

But it wasn't like they'd ever want him. Not when he was so broken and tainted and _repulsive_ to such pure beings. An abomination with demon blood; Lucifer's vessel. You couldn't get any more abhorrent than that.

So if this was the closest he'd ever get to Gabriel and Castiel, call him selfish, but he'd take it. He needed them more than he'd care to confess.

Team Free Will crept carefully through the entrance to the old warehouse. It was dark and, like most of the warehouses Sam and Dean visited, empty. Electricity didn't flow through the power lines to the building any more, mostly because the power lines to the building no longer existed. 

Still, it didn't stop Gabriel, once they had reached the appointed meeting place, from clapping his hands and dramatically stating _"Let there be light!"_ until every bulb in the crumbling building flared to life.

Dean rolled his eyes and Sam chuckled quietly as Gabriel grinned at them both.

"Good to know you've matured since regaining all of your grace," muttered Cas drily and Gabriel winked at him.

"Hey, if you've got it..." he smirked and Cas was about to make a smart retort when both angels felt another presence in the room and promptly shut their mouths to focus on the other being.

Both Winchesters went on high alert the moment the angels' blades dropped into their palms.

"And to what do I owe the pleasure?" Drawled a distinctly bored Scottish accent.

Every member of Team Free Will tensed as Rowena strode into view, glitzy black dress flowing majestically behind her as she eyed the men sceptically.

"You've forgotten our terms and conditions already, I see," she said distastefully as she glanced at the two angels, blades at the ready.

Dean nodded warily at them and both angels slowly placed their weapons on the floor. 

"She's unarmed," confirmed Cas quietly and Dean nodded again before taking a hesitant step forwards.

"Fergus mentioned something about a map?" Rowena asked. "A magical document that tells the holder the location of every being in existence; supernatural or otherwise. He said you wanted to trade it for some information."

Sam snorted. "Marauder's map? Yeah, I can't believe you fell for that. Do yourself a favour and read a book."

She lifted an eyebrow and Dean shrugged. 

"We had to get Crowley to do what we wanted somehow. He didn't need to know all the details as long as he knew how to find and contact you."

Rowena glared at them, mouth pursing into a thin line.

"If that's the case, I guess I'll be off," she stated before turning to leave, only to find herself held in place by an invisible force.

She whirled around to glare at the Winchesters only to spot Gabriel smirking at her.

"Sorry, what was that?"

"And who are you supposed to be?"

The archangel chuckled darkly and Sam was sharply reminded what the creature he was bonded to was capable of.

"Gabriel. They call me Gabriel."

"I'm sorry. _Who?_ " Sneered Rowena and Gabriel quirked a twisted smile at her, and it was then that Sam realised the archangel was trying to prevent himself from brutally smiting the witch after what she'd done to Castiel.

Dean must have come to the same conclusion because he quickly interrupted what was likely to be Rowena's demise.

"What do you know about bonds?"

The witch stared blankly at him. "As in the secret agent?"

Dean closed his eyes. Maybe this hadn't been such a fantastic idea.

"As in angelic mating bonds," he explained. "Soul-to-grace connections?"

The witch raised an intrigued eyebrow.

"I know they exist. I know lore has it that they're very powerful and deep-rooted. I know the angel must have a lot of trust and faith in the being they are bonding with."

Dean winced as Sam averted his gaze and even the angels stiffened fractionally. It was enough to secure Rowena's interest and she smirked at Castiel.

"Found yourself a little bit on the side, then? Or two bits?" She grinned, eying Sam and Dean like two pieces of meat.

Gabriel narrowed his gaze. "He did, but I assure you it's not with them."

Rowena flicked her disinterested gaze back to Gabriel once more.

"Once again, who are you?"

"But say we were in an unplanned and unwanted bond with an angel... how would we break that?" Interrupted Dean once more and Rowena smiled lazily at him again.

"I could break them for you," she shrugged and Dean gazed suspiciously at her.

"What's the catch?"

"Full protection from Fergus and his little minions," she demanded and both Winchesters snorted. 

"No way," huffed Sam as Dean shook his head.

"Not gonna happen. What Crowley does with you is none of our business."

"Then no deal," Rowena hummed dismissively before Gabriel coughed lightly and gestured to the unseen force keeping her from leaving the warehouse.

"Who _are_ you?" She asked exasperatedly, receiving only a ridiculous wiggle of eyebrows in response.

"How about you do it for free?" Smirked Dean and the witch pulled a face.

"You can't keep me here forever."

"They can't, but I can," grinned Gabriel and the witch raised an unimpressed eyebrow.

"Archangel," stage-whispered Gabe before winking and snapping his fingers, causing Rowena to be assaulted by confetti and a cacophony of unseen trumpets.

Then, the stunned witch blinked as all the lights in the warehouse suddenly began to flicker and thunder rumbled in the background as lightning flashed inside the building, causing six great shadows to appear ominously behind Gabriel's back, stretching impossibly outwards and looming over the witch's smaller figure.

"And I'm really not happy with how you've treated my mate," the archangel growled. "Or my family," he continued as he gestured to the Winchesters.

Rowena actually began to shake as she tried to cower from Gabriel's thunderous gaze.

"So I suggest helping us out for free, in case my hand accidentally... _slips_ ," said Gabriel lowly, and abruptly, all the lightbulbs shattered at once into millions of tiny shards.

And just as suddenly as the archangel became so hostile, the warehouse returned to normal; no glass fragments, no thunder and lightning, no imposing shadows and the lights even glowed warmly again as Gabriel willed a lollipop into existence.

"So hop to it," he grinned cheekily as he shoved the lollipop into his mouth and relinquished his invisible hold on Rowena.

The witch was clearly shaken as she stumbled towards Dean.

"Um... what was it you wanted me to do?" She asked, voice a tone higher than usual.

Dean motioned for Sam to join him and the younger Winchester did, coming to stand directly beside his brother.

"We both share bonds with Castiel and Gabriel. They were an accident formed from protecting us. We want you to break them; to give us our lives back," said Dean as he glanced at Sam in search of agreement.

The younger Winchester neither confirmed nor denied this.

Castiel and Gabe shared a glance that went unnoticed by the other three.

"They're causing you trouble?" Asked Rowena and Dean nodded.

"We just want them gone. We want our headspace to be our own again and for our souls to belong to us alone."

Sam shifted slightly but offered no words and this time Dean frowned at him.

Rowena lifted a curious eyebrow.

"There is a spell I know of," she commented and Dean's focus was back on her. "But you both have to be absolutely positive that you don't want these bonds. I don't want you trying to fight the magic attempting to break the connections."

Dean nodded eagerly. "We're sure."

Once again, Sam remained silent and Rowena briefly glanced at him before smiling too sweetly.

"Alright then, if you're certain," she said to Dean before turning to the younger Winchester. "Sam, why don't you go first?"

The younger Winchester blinked, caught off-guard.

"...Don't you want to do Dean first?" He tried and Rowena shook her head cheerfully.

"Nope. I think you should go first. Right, Dean?"

The older Winchester was glancing at Sam concernedly. "Well, yeah. I mean you might as well. The bonds are gonna break one way or another, regardless of what order we do it in."

Sam gulped as he shuffled from foot to foot.

"Maybe... maybe this isn't such a great idea. I mean... how much practice have you had at breaking these sorts of bonds anyway?" Asked Sam hesitantly as he flicked his gaze to the witch.

Rowena shrugged. "I don't meet all that many angels, but how many of my spells have actually failed?" She grinned, eyes glinting gleefully as she figured out what was going on.

Dean was still confused.

"She's right, Sam. This is our best shot at breaking the bonds. We may never get another opportunity, especially when they're strengthening all the time. We need to sever them _now._ "

At Sam's pause, Gabriel and Castiel perked up and Dean frowned.

"Sam?"

"Maybe not everyone's on board with your idea, Dean," hummed Rowena lightly and Dean's frown morphed into a scowl.

"Sam," he said warningly and the younger Winchester winced.

"Seriously?" Hissed Dean. "You're really gonna throw this opportunity away? What's wrong? Is it because of Rowena? Gabe and Cas aren't going to let her try anything; they can read her thoughts, remember? We've got to break the bonds before they get any stronger, otherwise we'll never get another chance. We'll be tied together forever."

"I don't want to break the bonds!" Blurted Sam and Dean recoiled in shock as Gabriel and Castiel's jaws dropped.

Rowena seemed oddly excited.

 _"What?"_ Dean sounded as though he was about to lash out at any second.

"I don't want to break the bonds," Sam said again, taking a step away from his brother, head bowed guiltily.

Neither Winchester saw the way Gabriel's hand twitched towards Sam, only for Cas to gently touch his wrist in warning, but Rowena did and she tilted her head, interest piqued.

"I can't believe this," growled Dean. "Why are you backing out now? You can't honestly say you enjoy being tethered to two lovesick angels?" He rounded on Gabriel. "If this is some prank-"

"It's not a prank!" Snapped Sam, before he averted his gaze once again. "I just don't think it's a good idea to break the bonds. They could come in useful, like Gabe's already said, and we're doing really well learning how to control them..." His face scrunched up. "I don't actually see the problem in keeping them."

If any of the three humans could see angel wings, they would have noticed both Castiel and Gabriel's wings fluttering behind them joyfully.

"Are you kidding?" Snarled Dean. "How can you not see a problem with being mated to two angels who we don't want and don't want us? I don't care what Missouri said; there was a mistake. I don't want to spend the rest of my life soul-bound to two beings I see as brothers. We all have secrets that shouldn't be shared like that; parts of ourselves that should never be revealed to others. How on Earth could these mating bonds be a good thing?"

"I don't get what you're so scared of, Dean!" Huffed Sam. "It's Cas and Gabe; they'd do anything for you, in case you haven't already figured that out by now. They could see your soul without the bonds so what makes you think they haven't already seen all the parts you're so desperately trying to keep hidden? They're family; they care for us just like we care for them. Why can't you just let them in and allow them to help you?" The younger Winchester closed his eyes and took a steadying breath.

"We have faced so much in our short lives. All the monsters and death and suffering; we've been to Hell more times than I can count! We've been through so much pain and torture, I don't understand why you won't let someone help you through the trauma and the nightmares. 

"And not only that, but Gabe and Cas have suffered too. They've faced death and they've been hunted by their own brothers and sisters. They've lost so much and been through so much agony; most of it _for us_ , so how can you not want to help them? I don't get why you don't see the bonds as an opportunity to heal and be healed."

"Because they _hurt_ ," ground out Dean and Sam, Cas and Gabe's faces all fell.

"Because every time I feel even a slither of emotion from either of them, it feels as though my body is trying to tear itself in two. My soul burns and my heart feels as though someone's hacking at it with a machete. A single thought from them and my skull throbs so hard I think it's trying to explode. 

"The bonds aren't helping me through my pain; they're causing it!"

If either Winchester had cared to look in the angels' direction, they would have noticed how completely and utterly wrecked Cas and Gabe looked; how they were so devastated, that a single tear rolled down Cas' cheek as Gabe trembled slightly in agony at Dean's words.

A cruel smirk wormed its way onto Rowena's face and no one but her noticed it.

"...Dean... I... I didn't... why didn't you say something?" Stuttered Sam quietly and the older Winchester shook his head in distaste.

"Because these bonds are meant to be sacred. They mean a lot to angels and I didn't want Castiel and Gabriel thinking they were hurting me. Like you said: they've been through enough."

When Dean turned to glance at the angels, they were both ramrod straight; tense as they refused to meet Dean's gaze. Whether it was out of anger or shame, Dean wasn't sure.

"I just want to cut the bonds. Even if you keep yours, please let me sever mine," begged Dean as he glanced between Sam and the two angels.

Cas looked ill. "If they are causing you pain, you don't need to ask for our permission."

Gabriel swallowed thickly and Dean idly wondered if archangels could vomit.

"Thank you," he said sincerely. "Rowena, just break my..." he trailed off as he turned around, finding only an empty space where the witch should have been.

"Rowena?" Dean called, panic creeping into his tone and when he received no response, he snarled and wordlessly stormed towards the warehouse's exit.

"Dean?" Sam tried, flinching when his brother whirled sharply on him.

"Forget it," he hissed. "I'm stuck with them like you wanted. Happy now?"

Sam lowered his gaze as Dean stomped out of the building. An engine roared to life and tires screeched as the Impala raced out of the empty car park at great speed, leaving the three remaining members of Team Free Will to feel particularly ashamed of themselves.

The lights in the building dimmed before finally flickering out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, more drama! Hope you enjoyed this particualrly angsty chapter - I swear the next one's got a bit of fluff in it! Tell me if you liked it or didn't and if you didn't, tell me why!


	10. Chapter 10

The silence in the dark warehouse was deafening. Sam, Gabriel and Castiel all stood stiffly, rooted to the spot as they avoided one another's gaze, each wondering how to fix the damage they'd caused.

Gabriel gingerly prodded his bond with Castiel and Cas startled slightly before carefully ensuring his connection with Dean was completely sealed. Gabriel did the same, with a meticulous attention he'd never bothered with previously. Neither angel had any intention of causing Dean further pain.

When they were both satisfied, Cas felt his mate trying to gain his focus through the bond and when the seraph turned to face him, Gabriel was subtly nodding towards Sam, who looked defeated and lost. His shoulders were slumped and his eyes glazed over as if he was battling with the weight of the world, and it looked as though at any moment he was going to collapse with grief.

With a gulp, the two angels glanced at each other and reached the same decision.

Sam jumped when he felt the first faint tendrils of soothing sneak across his newly opened bonds.

He attempted to resist them, because it wasn't fair he should receive comfort when his brother was hurting so much. His thoughts must have slipped over the bonds because there was a sharp sense of guilt from Cas and Gabe's ends and the tendrils slowly receded.

Sam was suddenly afraid of being alone.

He chased them with a pulse of apology and was rewarded by gratitude and reassurance.

"Why did you want to keep the bonds, Sam?" Came Gabriel's voice and it sounded choked, nervous even.

Sam was glad there were no lights in the building; he didn't think he could stand facing the two angels in that moment. The gentle glow of the moonlight through one of the broken windows was perfect for the kind of conversation they were about to have.

"I thought I'd explained all that," whispered Sam, taking a step back into the shadows when he heard the angels take one towards him. "They could be useful."

"Is that the only reason?" Asked Gabriel quietly and Sam's mind raced with plans of escape; of ways to run from the angels so they couldn't corner him and force him to admit things they wouldn't want to hear.

"Yes," lied Sam, heart dropping when he retreated into a wall. He had nowhere to run.

"Useful for what?" Murmured Gabriel and he was a lot closer than Sam had anticipated. Merely a few feet away.

"You were the one who explained it to us," mumbled Sam, desperately trying to find a way out of this predicament he'd tumbled so carelessly into.

"There isn't one," said Gabriel, stepping a little closer and Sam grimaced as he realised the bonds were wide open and both angels could feel every little emotion and thought passing through his body.

He slammed the bonds shut causing both angels to wince.

"Sam," commanded Gabriel firmly and the younger Winchester must have been feeling particularly brave because he didn't re-open the bonds as Gabriel wished.

The archangel deflated and Sam nearly opened them through instinct to comfort.

"Sam, please," begged Gabriel as though Sam knew what he was asking for. Even Castiel was staring at him expectantly, despite everything being hard to see in the darkness. He cursed angel night vision.

What did they want him to say? He wanted them? Needed them? He wanted to be held by them and to hold them as they shared reassuring touches and soft kisses? Did he say he loved them as more than brothers and he wanted to be close to them; to be protected and to protect them in return? 

Why weren't they going after Dean? Why weren't they focusing on his pain? Dean needed them more than Sam did and what Sam desired wasn't something the angels would be willing to give. Not to him. Not to a vile, tainted monster like Sam.

"Stop it," hissed Gabriel, furiously and Sam's eyes widened when he realised his mounting stress had caused the bonds to fly open half way through his internal monologue.

Gabriel was shaking with barely-restrained emotion as Castiel stood stone-like some distance behind, clenching and unclenching his fists.

Sam swallowed fearfully. This was it. They knew and they were disgusted by him and his thoughts. These beautiful, pure creatures he cared for so much were repulsed by his tarnished soul; the time he'd spent in Hell with Lucifer and Michael; the mutilations they'd caused to his entire being and all the damage he himself had caused in his short, miserable life. They could see the demon blood flowing through his veins and they couldn't stand to be near him, and they were going to tell him to stay away from them, to warn him to never think of them in such ways again. They didn't want him to stain their graces, to dim their brightness.

"Stop!" Choked Gabriel frantically as Cas began to shake and Sam froze, plastered against the wall as he shut his eyes anxiously, cursing once more how he'd forgotten about the open links.

"Why did you want to keep the bonds?" Whispered Gabriel shudderingly as he regained control of his violently flapping wings.

"What do you want me to say?" Whimpered Sam after a few moments. "I'm selfish and pathetic? I don't want to be alone? I miss Jessica? I miss having someone to hold me and tell me everything's going to be alright, regardless if it is or isn't?"

Gabriel gulped and Cas took a step forwards, but now the flood gates had opened, Sam couldn't seem to stop the words from pouring out.

"I want you. Both of you. I think I have done for some time without realising it, and I'm ashamed by it because you deserve _so much better._ I see you both together and I want to be a part of it. I feel the love you have for one another and I wish you could give some to me, even if it's only a fraction of what I have for you.

"I want to be able to come to you when I'm upset or angry and I want you to be able to do that to me. I want to laugh and cry with you, to touch you and be desired in return. I want to kiss you and hold you close and just do all the little things that are made so much better by being loved.

"I feel safe with you. I want someone to tell me that I'm not broken and even though my soul is cracked and blackened, I'm not some vile monster. I'm not just _'The boy with demon blood'_ or an abomination created to serve Lucifer.

"I just... I want to be wanted." 

Sam was pretty certain he was crying as he could feel his cheeks growing steadily more damp. He didn't even care if the angels punished him now; he'd bared his soul and it was as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders now that he'd finally admitted it all out loud. 

He was glad it was dark because even though he knew what was coming, actually seeing the angels' disgust would probably cause him to fall to the ground in a sobbing heap and he wanted to retain at least a slither of dignity.

He steeled himself up for the angels' repulsion.

And was completely knocked off guard when Gabriel pulled him into a gentle, uncharacteristically soft kiss.

The lights in the warehouse faded back on into a warm glow and when Gabriel pulled back, Sam stood frozen in shock as he stared wide-eyed at the archangel.

Gabriel briefly glanced at Cas and nodded him over with a tiny smile and the seraph seemed to be having difficulties staying upright as he stumbled over.

Then Gabriel's attention was back on Sam.

"Can Cas kiss you?" He whispered. "Or is it too much just yet?"

Sam opened his mouth to say something, but his tongue was thick in his mouth and no words came to him as his brain tried to process what was going on, so he snapped it shut again.

Gabriel chuckled and nodded at the younger angel and Cas wasted no time in capturing Sam's lips, cupping his cheek tenderly as if it would make the whole situation more real.

Sam was still waiting for his alarm clock to go off.

"You're not dreaming," murmured Cas against his lips and Sam realised he couldn't be, because there was no way he had ever imagined Castiel being _that_ good at kissing.

He jumped when Gabriel slid around his back, just to hold him as Cas continued to mouth at his lips.

The height difference between Sam and Gabriel would have been laughable, except for the fact that Sam still couldn't believe this was happening and Gabriel was peppering kisses up his spine.

"You're not broken," whispered Gabriel, "and you're not some vile monster."

"You are not just _'The boy with demon blood'_ and you aren't merely an abomination created to serve Lucifer," murmured Castiel in between kisses.

Sam broke down.

He sobbed openly into Castiel's neck as the seraph held him, Gabriel continuing to press kisses over his back.

"You are blinding, Sam Winchester," whispered Castiel as he stroked the younger man's hair. "I don't know where you got this idea of your soul being damaged beyond repair, but that isn't at all what we see."

"There are a couple of dull patches within it, it's true," muttered Gabriel as he rubbed soothing circles into Sam's hips with his thumbs. "But they do nothing to impair its overall beauty. You have one of the brightest souls I have ever laid eyes upon. And I've been around a long time," chuckled Gabriel as he leaned on his tip toes to press a kiss to the shell of Sam's ear.

Sam's legs gave out and he collapsed to the floor, both angels easily catching him as they slowly lowered themselves to the ground.

"And here we thought we were pining," commented Gabriel as he wasted no time in using this new angle to his advantage.

Cas nuzzled Sam's jaw as Gabriel peppered kisses over the back of the human's neck.

"Pining?" Choked Sam. "Over _me?_ "

Cas hummed in agreement as he claimed Sam's lips again. He really like kissing Sam, but then again that wasn't too surprising considering he made every excuse he could to kiss Gabriel.

Sam's brain must have finally got with the programme because he began kissing back like his life depended on it and Cas smiled contentedly as he unleashed his wings and curled them around both Gabriel and the youngest Winchester.

Sam quickly broke away to stare intently at the patch of air behind Cas' shoulder and the seraph made a noise of protest as he tried to regain Sam's attention. He was surprised when the human reached up to touch the space where his wings resided, only to abort the movement a second later.

Gabe was watching over Sam's shoulder with a raised eyebrow.

"What can you see, Sam?" He asked curiously. There was no way a human should be able to see Castiel's wings without it causing eye damage.

"I thought... they look like feathers," frowned Sam. "But they move like water."

At Gabriel and Castiel's shocked shared glance Sam tensed.

"Is that bad? Have I done something wrong? I'm so sorry, I didn't meant to-"

Cas shut him up with a firm kiss. It was quickly becoming his favourite hobby.

"You can see his wings?" Marvelled Gabriel before frowning. "No burning sensations behind the eyeballs? Temporary blindness? Can you see spots?"

Sam pulled away from Cas' mouth breathlessly and shook his head.

"I take it this doesn't usually happen?"

Gabriel shrugged before winding his arms around Sam's middle.

"I've never bonded to a human before, but no, you shouldn't be able to see our wings without going blind. The fact that you can, even just a part of them, is frankly amazing."

Sam finally smiled and Gabriel idly thought it suited him.

"Maybe the bonds tune me in to your wavelength, or something? I've seen them before but never that clear."

Gabriel hummed in agreement as he stole a brief kiss. He could see why Cas liked that so much.

"You can see more of our wings the stronger the bonds get?" He asked as he nuzzled at the curve of the younger Winchester's neck. He was rewarded with a happy sigh and the Winchester nodded.

"They're amazing," he murmured and Gabriel released his own wings, curving them around his mates.

Plural. He had two.

Cas must have picked up on his joy because he grinned and tucked one of Gabriel's largest wings around them all more securely.

"I can't believe this is happening," blurted Sam suddenly and both angels chuckled as they nuzzled at him.

"Neither can we," hummed Gabriel. "We just hide it better."

"What about Dean?" Sam asked after a moment and he shifted slightly as if making to get up. Both angels scowled and wound their arms tighter around him.

"Let Dean cool off," huffed Gabriel. "He needs some time alone without us bothering him. Now we know the bonds are hurting him, we can better seal them and maybe save his some pain." Gabriel sounded guilty and Sam didn't like hearing the archangel like that. He interlaced their hands over his stomach.

Castiel didn't look too happy either, but he managed to place a kiss on the human's jaw.

"We can deal with Dean later. This time is for you, Sam. Don't be afraid to be selfish once every so often; you are allowed some things for yourself."

Sam kept up his protest for a few seconds longer before finally relaxing into their hold. He really wanted them.

"You've got us," whispered Gabriel. "And we're not going anywhere."

Sam sent a burst of affection through both bonds and smiled when the pair sighed happily and snuggled further into him. 

Apparently angels were cuddly creatures.

"Don't pretend you don't love it," huffed Gabe as he practically tried to mould himself into Sam's back. The human had better ideas and both angels yelped in surprise as Sam manoeuvred them all until the two angels were perched in Sam's lap, his arms around them both.

Cas and Gabe were delighted with the new arrangement and they quickly nestled against Sam's broad chest, shifting their wings until they were all cocooned in a myriad of black and gold 'feathers'.

Sam carefully reached up to where he saw a shimmer of gold and Gabriel cracked an eye open as he watched, smirking when Sam's face fell in disappointment as his hand drove straight through the 'feathers'.

Gabriel nudged Cas with a pointed stare and the younger angel tugged Sam's hovering arm back around his waist as he closed his eyes again. Gabriel chuckled and suddenly, the air shifted and popped, glittering blacks and deep purples, navy blues and dark greens as a patch that Sam had seen shining under the light, morphed into real bird-like feathers, until Sam gasped as he realised he was staring at a physical embodiment of Castiel's huge wings.

Then, the air shifted again, popping louder and glittering with golds, bronzes, pearls and oranges as Gabriel's six enormous wings materialised into view and Sam sat mesmerised at the wall of feathers surrounding them all.

"Show off," grumbled Castiel and Gabriel laughed freely as he batted one of his smaller wings at Cas' head.

Once again, Sam reached up to touch, only to hesitate as he glanced at the two angels, seeking permission.

"We're yours," murmured Cas as he practically rubbed himself all over Sam's chest until his head was tucked under his chin. It reminded the younger Winchester of a cat marking its territory. "You can touch us anywhere you like."

Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and Sam couldn't hold back his amusement as he chuckled at their antics. They were both so different yet they fit together perfectly.

It dawned on him how easily they'd accepted him into their relationship. How simple it seemed to let go around them. For weeks he'd longed to be a part of what they had together, never believing he'd actually get what he wanted. Now he had it, he was surprised at how natural it felt to be with them; to hold them close and be held in return. He'd even kissed them and the jaw-dropping part was: they truly wanted him.

There was no mistaking their love and need for him either, because the bonds were wide open and he could feel every little emotion they were willing to give.

And they were giving a lot.

It was overwhelming actually; to feel such magnificent beings touching his soul, drowning him with love and affection when he was so desperate for it. Their graces were pure and bright and instead of feeling afraid of tarnishing them like he thought he would, he felt welcomed and safe. Cas and Gabe were stunning.

A burst of humbled gratitude and embarrassment pulsed across the bonds from both angels and Sam couldn't believe he'd caused that. He let out a startled laugh before a tendril of energy from his soul snaked through both bonds and prodded curiously as the angels' graces.

He was surprised by their shuddering breaths and encouraged, he brushed the tendrils across their graces.

The two resulting moans were not what he expected.

"Don't stop," pleaded Cas and Sam didn't think he'd ever heard the usually stoic angel sound so desperate.

He brushed the tendrils harder against their graces, teasing at them a little longer and both angels groaned, completely wrecked.

"When we said touch us anywhere, we didn't expect you to go for the big leagues, kiddo," chuckled Gabriel, voice breaking off into a deep moan as more of Sam's soul cradled his grace.

Sam wondered how long they'd wanted him if this was the type of reaction he was getting.

"A long time," breathed Cas before Sam gasped as the seraph's grace attacked his soul, embracing it and curling around it possessively. Sam buried his face into Cas' neck to stop himself from making any embarrassing noises as the angel bared his entire being to him, trusting him with everything he was and used to be. It was more intimate than Sam could've ever imagined and distantly he heard himself sobbing as he realised how vulnerable Cas was in that moment and how much faith he had put in the youngest Winchester to not harm him.

Gabriel gently touched Castiel's shoulder.

"Too much," he whispered and Cas cautiously extracted himself from Sam's soul with a hint of guilt.

Sam responded with a blast of reassurance and honour that he'd been allowed to see that.

"There will be plenty of time to explore the bonds when they're stronger," commented Gabriel quietly, "but for now, maybe we need to tone it down a little?"

Sam became aware of his bond to Castiel beginning to throb and he winced slightly at the ache. Castiel grimaced as he realised the link had been too weak to take such an onslaught of raw emotion and instead of using the bond to convey his apology, he lightly touched Sam's arm, to prevent their connection from becoming any more inflamed.

Gabriel gazed at the younger angel fondly.

"Cas doesn't do anything in halves, do you, fledgling? It's either all or nothing."

Sam smirked at the pet name, chuckling when Castiel bowed his head, a rosy hue flushing his cheeks. 

"Apologies, Sam. It seems I got a little too excited."

The human laughed warmly and Cas relaxed at the comforting sound. 

"And here's me thinking I was the desperate one."

Cas quirked a grin. "Gabriel and I have been just as needy. Maybe even more so." He settled against Sam's chest. "Your soul is wonderful. It's warm and calming and so very caring. I can't understand where you got the idea we would be repulsed by it."

Sam tugged the angels closer as Gabriel huffed petulantly.

"Now you're trying to make me jealous."

Cas winked at him and Sam shook his head as Gabriel stuck his tongue out. He hadn't expected Cas to be so playful when he usually seemed so serious. He liked it.

"Are you preening?" Laughed Gabriel and sure enough when Sam turned to face Cas, the younger angel's wings were beginning to lift, the feathers fluffing out slightly like a bird in mating season.

"Aww, is that because Sammy said he likes you?" Teased Gabriel and Cas ducked his head in embarrassment once more. Sam really enjoyed the angels being able to hear his thoughts over the bonds.

"Apparently, so does Cas," winked Gabriel and the younger angel did a perfect imitation of a tomato.

His feathers were still fluffed up and Sam couldn't help but run his finger over one, causing Castiel to stiffen. It didn't look like a bad stiffen though, so Sam stroked the feathers carefully once more and the seraph leaned into Sam's touch.

Gabriel nudged Sam with his elbow to get his attention and once he had it, the archangel raked his hand through the inside of Cas' wing, fingers buried deep between the feathers and the seraph groaned and slumped against Sam's chest, holding the wing out for Gabriel's access.

Intrigued, Sam carded his fingers through the back of Cas' other wing and the angel closed his eyes with a contented sigh.

"Angels like to be groomed," explained Gabriel at Sam's curious glance. "We're social creatures, but the grooming of wings is usually performed by mates or very close friends, like those in a flock."

Sam perked up at the word.

"So a flock isn't just for mates then?"

Gabriel shook his head, idly petting Castiel's wing as Sam stroked the other.

"Nope. It's a group of people who all trust each other deeply and they rely on one another to never harm them. They can be completely open with one another without fear of judgement and their main priority is one another, regardless of what's going on around them. A flock provides protection and comfort to those within it."

"Sounds heavenly," murmured Sam without thinking and both angels barked out a laugh.

"I suppose it is," teased Gabriel as Sam rolled his eyes.

The archangel melted when Sam buried his fingers into one of his wings.

"At least now I know a way to shut you up," chuckled Sam and Gabriel flexed his wings, pressing them into Sam's large palm as he snuggled into the human.

"There are plenty of ways to shut me up," purred Gabriel, settling close to where Cas was using Sam as a pillow. "I'm sure Cas'll show you them all."

Sam hummed in approval as he did something clever with his fingers, making both angels groan bonelessly.

"We're supposed to be taking care of you," protested Cas weakly and Sam grinned.

"Trust me, you are. You guys letting me touch you? This is more than I could've ever dreamed of."

Gabriel and Castiel shared a brief glance before they were surging as one and pushing Sam's back to the grimy floor.

Except it wasn't grimy. Or a floor. 

It was a bed and a very large, heart-shaped one at that, situated in the middle of what seemed to be a hotel suite, with rose petals littered all over the floor. There were lit candles everywhere and the carpets were soft and thick, more luxurious than anything Sam had ever seen in his life.

He gazed up at Gabriel in amusement only to find the archangel beaming at his brother, who was staring at anything that wasn't his mates.

Sam's eyebrows shot to his hairline and Gabriel snorted at the expression.

"Sap," he teased as he glanced back to his brother and the seraph carefully slid a wing around the archangel, prompting Gabriel's gaze to soften as he stole a tender kiss.

"The bed wasn't mine," huffed Cas and Gabriel chuckled. 

"I'm good at beds."

"No, you're good _in_ them."

Sam choked back a laugh as Gabriel waggled his eyebrows, his wings fluttering playfully behind him as Cas stared straight-faced at his brother.

"Can we get back to our human?" Asked Castiel and Sam's heart warmed at the possessive wording. He belonged to them now.

"And we're going to make it very clear how much we want to keep you," hummed Gabriel as he began to pepper kisses down Sam's throat.

Cas decided to forgo words as he dove straight in for Sam's lips and the younger Winchester tightened his grip in their wings as Cas licked inside his mouth insistently, tasting every part of him he could.

Cas tasted like coffee and ozone and oceans. Sam was immediately addicted.

Gabriel pawed at his jacket until he grew too impatient and snapped his fingers until Sam was free of it. It folded itself neatly over the back of a cosy-looking arm chair.

Gabriel then unbuttoned his shirt and Sam wondered if they should really have sex when they had only just admitted they wanted to be together less than twenty minutes ago, when Gabe began to plant kisses all over his chest and stomach.

Castiel quickly released his mouth to join the other angel and Sam let his head flop back at the fond affection flooding the bonds.

"This goes at your pace, Sam," whispered Gabriel between kisses and the human closed his eyes at the unfamiliar sensations. He couldn't remember the last time someone had just lavished attention on him without there being frantic yanking at clothing, and a rush to get off in any way possible.

He definitely couldn't remember the last time he had done anything with another male. Maybe in college? 

Cas growled and Gabriel flicked his gaze up to Sam.

"Cas is possessive. I wouldn't keep thinking about nameless, insignificant one-night stands if I were you. Even I'm getting a little antsy."

That was a challenge. Sam liked challenges. He flashed a brief image over the bonds of him with a girl he'd only met once in a sleazy bar, and the reaction was instantaneous.

Cas lunged for his mouth as Gabriel poured jealousy through their bond and Sam had never been kissed so filthily in his life. The seraph took everything he could from Sam as he claimed him, and Gabriel covered them all with his wings as he sucked on one of Sam's nipples, nipping at it in reprimand before scraping his teeth down the human's chest and moving back up to lick at the other nipple.

Cas pinned his shoulders down as Sam arched upwards and the seraph nipped at his bottom lip before sucking hotly at his throat and scraping his teeth over his adam's apple.

"You're ours," growled Cas and Sam whined a little at that. He'd wanted this for so long.

"Nobody gets to touch you except us, got it?" Hissed Gabriel before biting at Sam's nipple once more and the human bucked upwards.

"Fine," choked out Sam as both angels continued their pleasurable onslaught. Then he dipped his thumbs into the oil glands he'd been searching for whilst they were distracted, and both angels howled with pleasure as Sam's hands were coated with the slick liquid. "But that means only I get to touch you."

The angels collapsed onto Sam, writhing and moaning as the human pushed his thumbs deeper into the glands. They pressed their faces into his neck, panting heavily.

"Sam..." Begged Gabriel as the youngest Winchester slowly dipped his thumbs in and out of the glands, stimulating more oil to leak from the sensitive areas.

Sam grinned as the angels whimpered and scrabbled at his chest, crying out as he scraped his nails inside the glands. 

"You two are so beautiful," whispered Sam breathlessly as he gazed at their arching bodies and gorgeous wings, marvelling how he was allowed to touch them like this.

Castiel clutched at his shoulder as he released a blissful sob and Gabriel keened loudly as he buried himself into Sam's side. They both shoved as much arousal and desire and need through the bonds as they could, drowning Sam's soul and the younger Winchester didn't even care about the ache in the inflamed link with Castiel because seeing the angels fall apart like this was _breathtaking._

He had never believed he would be allowed this; had never pictured being able to touch these angels so intimately. He still wasn't convinced he deserved any of this, not after all the damage and death he'd caused; all the people he hadn't saved. Yet Gabriel and Castiel were here in his arms and they seemed to think he was worth something, so he continued to tease them and offer them as much pleasure as he could in the hopes that maybe they'd stay even after the novelty of their relationship had worn off.

Both angels cried out hoarsely as Sam replaced his thumbs with two fingers each, continuing to work at the glands and grinning when he noticed the oil leaking steadily over the angels' feathers.

He rubbed the glands raw and slipped a third finger in each of them, stretching them out and making both angels sob brokenly into his neck, until their wings began to thrash violently and Gabriel yelled out sharply. 

"Close your eyes!"

Cas slapped a hand over his eyes as he shut them and behind his lids he could see a blindingly bright mess of blue and gold light engulfing the room and when it faded after a couple of seconds, Sam gingerly opened his eyes to find the angels collapsed against him, wings trembling in pleasure as they smiled warmly and cuddled into him.

Sam instinctively curled his arms around them and tugged them closer.

"How did you know?" Croaked Gabriel and he sounded utterly wrecked. Sam pressed a kiss to his hair.

"I spotted one of Cas' glands when he stretched out his wing for you back in the warehouse. With all those feathers hiding them, I thought they might be pretty sensitive."

"I didn't even know we had them," gulped Gabriel as Sam stroked one of his shaking wings in an attempt to soothe it. "I've never had anyone touch my wings when they're in a physical state rather than their ethereal form. I had no idea those glands even existed."

Cas mumbled something that could have been a sound of agreement, but his face was plastered against Sam's neck too tightly for it to be coherent.

"We are definitely doing that again," concluded Gabriel and Castiel practically purred as Sam combed his fingers through some of his dark feathers.

Sam's heart flipped at the prospect of being able to touch these stunning creatures once more.

Gabriel propped himself up on one elbow as Cas wrapped his wing around Sam like a blanket, a small frown making its way onto his features. Even the archangel was looking troubled.

"We've told you, kiddo; we're not going anywhere. We're yours just as much as you're ours. We won't leave unless you want us to; you're our mate."

Sam felt tears well up in his eyes and he blinked them away furiously, leaning into Gabriel's touch as he brushed away a stray droplet of water. 

"You are awe inspiring, Sam Winchester, and I won't stand for you believing you're anything less," whispered Gabriel fiercely. "You're intelligent and kind-hearted; you always put others' needs before your own and you have gone far too long without taking something for yourself."

"Let us take care of you, Sam," murmured Castiel, obviously having recovered a little more. "Let us love you and cherish you in the way you deserve."

Sam didn't trust his own voice to work so he squeezed his eyes shut as he pretended he wasn't crying, and he held his angels close.

"Ssh, little one," soothed Gabriel and Sam would never admit to finding comfort in the ironic endearment. Of course, Gabriel picked up on it through the bond and filed the information away for later use.

"Relax. We've got you," mumbled Cas as he pressed light kisses to the shell of Sam's ear. 

Sam sighed softly as he felt tendrils of affection and protectiveness surrounded his soul. He couldn't remember the last time he fully let go in someone's arms, but there was no one he trusted more in that moment than the two angels wrapped around him. He vaguely wondered if he'd get to feel this for the rest of his life.

Gabriel grinned into his neck. "We'll stay as long as you want us to."

Sam felt the emotional exhaustion of the day creep up on him before it totally engulfed his mind and body. He didn't want to succumb to rest; too excited to explore the budding relationship he'd found himself a part of, but it was warm in his position wedged between the two cuddly angels, and he felt a deep ingrained sense of love and safety within himself that his soul had been missing for decades.

"Sleep," whispered Cas. "We'll be here when you awake."

As Gabriel nestled down onto the bed, curving three golden wings around his mates, Sam tangled his fingers in his angels' feathers before finally allowing his mind to rest.

 

* * *

 

It was the most peaceful rest he'd had in a long time, even if it was only a nap. There were no haunting visions of the cage and he wasn't assaulted by the smell of beer when he first woke up (thanks to Dean's ironing of his bed sheets). He was surrounded in a cocoon of fluffy feathers and before he opened his eyes, he could hear the soft murmurs of Castiel and Gabriel's discussion.

He chose to keep his eyes closed for a little longer, just to bask in the sensations of being held and protected.

"You were right," mumbled Gabriel as he placed a gentle hand on Sam's chest, right over where his heart resided.

Cas tilted his head. "About what?"

Gabriel glanced over to him. "About you not being like them. This is nothing like what I had with them."

Sam's interest was piqued. He assumed Gabriel was referring to his previous mates. He knew the archangel had once had a flock in Heaven, but he had no idea who the angels were, nor what had happened to them.

There was the sound of feathers rustling as Castiel curled his wing around his brother.

"You're only just beginning to figure that out?" Cas sounded faintly amused.

Gabe snorted. "I'm old. Cut me some slack."

There was a quiet, wet noise as though Cas had just leaned over Sam to steal a kiss from the archangel and Sam felt his lip twitch as it tried to break out into a smile. He liked hearing the angels being affectionate with each other.

Gabriel's thumb began to rub slow circles over Sam's chest.

"As I've already told you, brother, you will always have a home with us," came Castiel's soft but sincere voice.

Gabriel chuckled. "I think I'm starting to believe that."

A pause.

"You realise we know you're awake, right? Even if we didn't share bonds, we are celestial beings; we can tell when you're asleep or not," huffed Gabriel amusedly and Sam cracked open an eyelid.

"I was enjoying the soap opera."

The archangel slapped a wing over his face, giving him a mouthful of feathers.

Castiel however, straddled him as he batted the golden wing away, and began to pepper slow, tender kisses over his chest and neck as though marking Sam as the angel's. Gabriel watched the display with a fond smile as he stroked his brother's wing.

"I think Cas is pretty serious about you staying with us," chuckled the archangel and Sam grinned as he tangled his fingers in the seraph's hair. 

"What about you?" He asked curiously and Gabriel lifted an eyebrow before nuzzling the curve of Sam's neck and mouthing a few kisses there.

"I would've thought my intentions were pretty obvious."

Sam placed his hand between the bases of Gabriel's wings, before screwing up his face when his hand stuck to the archangel's skin.

"I'm sticky," he announced confusedly and both angels glanced at him before they remembered where Sam had had his hands earlier.

Gabriel grinned wolfishly. "So are our feathers."

Sam perked up as Cas nosed at his neck. "We may need help grooming them," the seraph hummed.

Sam was convinced he had died and gone to Heaven.

"Not as nice up there as it is right here," purred Gabriel as he arched into Sam's large palm. "And we should know."

Sam was getting up before anyone had time to blink. Both angels whined at the loss of contact and Sam rolled his eyes as he held up his hands.

"Going to wash off the dried oil. When I come back, you better have at least the upper half of your bodies exposed."

Gabriel smirked. "So bossy."

Cas was already shucking his trench coat when Sam turned to make his way to the bathroom.

When Sam returned (having also brushed his teeth with the conveniently placed, complementary toothbrush and paste - _thanks, Gabriel_ ), he felt his pulse speed up at how Cas already had his fingers buried deep in a set of Gabriel's wings. There was just something so wonderfully intimate about seeing the two angels together like this. The seraph's touch had a sense of curiousness to it, as though he still couldn't quite believe he was allowed to touch an archangel, but Gabriel didn't look like he was going to protest any time soon (unless it was to say _'harder, deeper'_ ), if the way he fanned his wings wider was anything to go by.

Sam had thought Cas' wings were massive, but the archangel's wings were enormous. They draped off the edges of the bed at their full length, trailing along the floor and covering the room in feathers. 

"The textures are far different from what we're used to," supplied Cas as Sam came to sit beside him, shooting him an odd look. "Yet, I can't say they're unpleasant. Certainly messier, but I wouldn't mind doing this again."

Sam stared at the clumps of dried oil sticking to Gabriel's wings and he immediately placed his hands over them to warn them up and liquify them again, before carding his fingers through the feathers.

"Woah, hold on a minute," huffed Gabriel. "If we're topless, you have to be too."

Sam shook his head with a smile before ridding himself of his already unbuttoned shirt.

Gabriel hummed in approval and nestled back into the mattress, the back of his wings spread wide in invitation as he lay on his front.

"Reorganise the ones that are displaced and I suppose we remove the feathers that are damaged or broken?" Suggested Cas and Gabriel shifted.

"Wait, is that gonna hurt?" You couldn't pull the 'feathers' out when in energy form; it would be like ripping out part of the angel's grace.

"Not if they work like bird wings," shrugged Sam, happy to know he wasn't the only one who was new to this.

Gabriel contemplated this for a moment before settling back down and trusting his mates to know what was best for him. It warmed Sam's heart.

The archangel groaned when two different hands teased at his oil glands.

"Oh... I definitely like this way of grooming," he moaned as seraph and human dragged the oil through his large primary wings.

After a few minutes of working at Gabriel's feathers, Sam cocked his head to one side.

"...You said before that we were nothing like _'them'_. Are _'they'_ your previous mates? You said you've already had practice with mating bonds."

Gabriel stiffened slightly, but Castiel remained a supportive presence by his side.

"He deserves to know," the seraph whispered solemnly and Gabriel sighed defeatedly. Sam almost felt guilty for asking the question. Still, he wanted to learn as much as he could about his new lovers.

"I was mated a very long time ago, before Cas had even been created." He paused as if trying to get his thoughts and emotions under control. Sam could feel traces of fear and hurt sneaking through their bond and it worried him. Gabriel seemed frightened Sam would reject him, which was a ridiculous thought. What could cause the archangel to be so insecure?

Castiel continued to card his fingers rhythmically through a golden wing and Sam didn't miss the way the wing arched into the touch, as if seeking comfort.

Gabriel heaved out another sigh. "I was mated to Michael, Lucifer and Raphael."

Sam froze and Gabriel's bond radiated rejection and agony as it slowly tried to close itself off from Sam's shock and horror.

Sam immediately recognised his mistake and pulsed apology through their link. Gabriel relaxed and responded with a burst of relief as Sam restarted his attention to the archangel's wing.

"What happened?" He asked as Cas shot him a grateful smile.

"We loved each other very dearly. We all knew exactly what we meant to each other and what roles we were supposed to play. But then Michael and Lucifer began to fight and Raphael distanced himself from us. I couldn't stand it anymore so I ran away."

As Gabriel spoke, his bond painted a clearer, more emotional picture of all that he had felt and experienced and Sam felt his own heart break at some of the things Gabriel had been through.

"I hid out on Earth for quite some time before all the angels felt Lucifer fall. The rage and spite building between Michael and Lucifer finally bubbled over and the bonds were already aching from being closed for so long; when Lucifer was cast into Hell, the links shattered."

Such simple words were an insult to the torture and agony Gabriel had suffered at that time when his whole life had been destroyed, and as the images and emotions rolled through the bonds, Sam had to shut his eyes to prevent his tears from falling.

He quickly gathered the archangel into his arms, ignoring the burst of surprise through their bond, and held Gabriel close.

"That'll never happen again," hissed Sam fiercely. "We'll never hurt you like that. Never."

Gabriel blinked before he buried his face into Sam's neck, melting into the comforting embrace. He was aware of Cas slipping in behind him and he wrapped his arms around the older angel in silent agreement.

The archangel was overwhelmed by the amount of love he was receiving through the bonds. He needed this; it sounded selfish, but he needed his mates to want him after having failed his previous mates so horribly.

" _They_ failed _you_ ," growled Sam. "But they won't get to make that same mistake twice because we're not giving you up for anything."

Gabriel would never admit to purring.

Sam wouldn't forget it though because he grinned right before he captured the archangel's lips.

"Ours," murmured Castiel as he trailed lazy kisses across the back of Gabriel's neck and shoulders, and the archangel's wings fluffed up in delight.

Sam chuckled at Gabriel's rapidly reddening face before nuzzling his hair.

"On your front; we owe you a grooming."

Gabriel was quick to comply and they continued to talk about the nature of their bonds, even discussing Gabriel's previous experiences with them as they lavished attention on the six golden wings. They talked about flocks and what that meant to angels, and they talked about mates in general and what the title entailed.

It took four hours to finish them completely and when they were done, Gabriel was a boneless heap of fluffy contentedness beneath Cas and Sam. The human was glowing with happiness at all he had learned and all his mates were willing to offer; he had never felt quite so loved and needed in all his life as the bonds continued to allow affection and fondness to flow between them.

Cas squinted off into the distance as Sam and Gabriel stretched all the kinks out of their bodies.

"I think it's time we check on Dean," the seraph intoned gravely. "We have a few things to discuss with him."

Sam gulped. "Do we really have to tell him about us right now? I mean, I haven't even been with you guys for twenty-four hours yet."

Gabriel placed a reassuring hand on his back. "I don't think that's what Cas meant."

Cas shook his head at Sam's confused glance.

"Whilst we will have to explain that you have chosen to take on the full title of our mate at some point, I was actually referring to the unusual pain Dean seems to be suffering because of the bonds."

Sam tilted his head. "Unusual?"

Gabriel nodded worriedly. "Whilst an unwanted bond can cause a few problems and maybe even the occasional ache, he shouldn't be going through so much torture because of them. It's actually rather concerning."

Sam was yanking his shirt back on before Gabriel had even finished. His brother was in trouble.

"But I thought you said you felt pain from your bonds with the other archangels?" Asked Sam, puzzled and Gabriel shook his head.

"They ached because the participants grew to hate one another. The bonds weren't just unwanted; they were _despised_. They were used to intentionally hurt the angels on the other side of them so they twisted and weakened. They were never supposed to break and that's why there was so much agony."

"But none of us hold ill intent towards Dean and so far the bonds have mainly only been used to offer comfort," stated Castiel. "It's worrisome that he should be feeling so much pain over them, especially when we can't detect any of it. We need to work out what's happening inside Dean's soul."

Sam nodded determinedly as he came to stand between them and they each placed a hand on his shoulders as Gabriel raised his free hand.

He snapped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People kept begging me for fluff so here is an extra long and extra fluffy chapter for you guys to enjoy! Tell me what you thought!


	11. Chapter 11

Due to the never-ending pain he had suffered from the presence of the bonds, Dean had assumed he would be relieved when Castiel and Gabriel sealed the links with more cautiousness and thoroughness than they had ever previously shown.

He wasn't prepared for how empty he would feel afterwards.

His heart hadn't counted on the loneliness and rejection it would feel at not being able to sense even a trace of Castiel or Gabriel, and although the agony had diminished significantly, Dean wasn't entirely sure if closing the bonds was something he truly wanted. 

He was shocked to realise how much he had grown used to being able to feel the angels; how much comfort he had gained from that. He was stunned to realise he enjoyed feeling their happiness, and he missed being able to offer soothing when they were upset (even if it had hurt him). He relied on them to calm him when he was angry and he hadn't forgotten all the bursts of affection from Cas when they were together (even if they were unintentional), or the way Gabriel had reached out to him when he'd noticed his distress from being too close to Amara.

Now, everything was still. Silent.

And Dean had made it that way; he had broken it... again. He had ruined everything because of his big mouth and instead of keeping his thoughts to himself, he had selfishly snapped at Sam and the angels, complaining about his pain.

And now he was paying the price for his thoughtlessness.

He kicked frustratedly at a chair, bracing over the table as he dropped his head in shame. What was wrong with him? Why couldn't he just accept the bonds like Sam had? Why was he so aggressively conflicted over them?

He slumped into the chair and buried his head into his hands. Why was he such a srew-up?

He heaved out a sigh. He wasn't sure what he wanted anymore. The bonds were certainly useful, like Gabriel had said, for hunts and research, but anything other than that and Dean's skin crawled. At the same time though, certain parts of him were curious to explore further; to see what else the connections were capable of, but he had never had the courage (nor the willingness) to find out.

He wasn't even supposed to be thinking of Gabriel and Castiel like that. They were _angels_. Surely it was a sin or something to think of celestial beings in that way? Especially for someone like him, who had literally been dragged through Hell and caused so many deaths, it was like a crime drama. He had tortured and taunted, slaughtered and manipulated; heck, he'd even become a demon! He'd hurt so many people, so many angels, so what made him think Castiel and Gabriel would even spare him a glance?

Not to mention he'd been such a jerk to them since the start of the whole mating bond escapade, he was surprised they hadn't smote him earlier. Although he probably wasn't worth the effort.

He dug his fingers into his scalp with an angry huff. Why was he even thinking about this? He wasn't gay. And he knew that angels were sexless, but that was besides the point. The point was...

...He wasn't entirely sure what the point was. 

What was he even contemplating? He cared for the angels deeply; they were his brothers. So what if their bonds had been strengthened because of some slightly more complicated feelings on all ends? The angels were his family and he would die to protect them. He loved them.

...He was in so much trouble. He couldn't even tell if his love for them was the sort of affectionately fond kind of love that one has for close friends or something else completely. He just knew it hurt to think about it. 

All he had to do was think about the angels or their bonds and his heart would ache and his soul would throb and his brain would try to crack itself open. Which was really confusing because the other part of his heart would flutter excitedly, as another part of his soul brightened joyfully and the other half of his brain would encourage him to take the next step in their relationship.

He groaned. They didn't even have a relationship. Why was this all so exhaustingly complicated?

What was he supposed to do when half his body was telling him to keep away from the angels and their bonds, and the other half was telling him to go for it, to just give himself to his friends?

Then there was the whole situation with Sam's horrifying visions of the Cage and what they might mean for trapping the Darkness and tying her back up again with the help of Michael and Lucifer.

He felt like his brain was going to explode from all the stress. 

He would never admit how relieved he was when Gabriel, Castiel and Sam appeared in the centre of the room.

He leapt to his feet with an expression of humiliation.

"I'm sorry," he blurted, shocking the newly-arrived trio. "I never should have said the things I did and I wish I could take it all back." He seemed to have been making a lot of awkward apologies recently, but he couldn't find it in himself to care any more.

The silence of the bonds was unbearable. He needed the familiar sensations of their presence even if it would undoubtedly cause him pain.

"...Dean-" began Castiel but the older Winchester shook his head frantically as he took a step forward.

"I know I'm difficult. I'm stubborn and aggressive; I don't listen when I'm supposed to and I'm as emotionally stunted as a brick." He gulped, eyes shining with desperation. "But please, _please_ open the bonds. I can't stand the emptiness. There's nothing and I can't deal with that. I can't cope with the silence."

The trio's eyes widened in unison and before Dean could beg the angels again, the links ripped open and comfort, worry and reassurance flooded both bonds, causing Dean to stumble at the weight of emotion.

It was like a dam had crumbled and suddenly, as agony flared through Dean's body like it always did when the bonds were in use, the older Winchester felt his eyes well up with tears as he used the table to prevent himself from collapsing to the floor. 

"I'm sorry," he whimpered as Castiel and Gabriel surged forwards to catch him, Sam standing frozen in fear behind them, desperately wishing he had the bond with his brother back, just so he could know what Dean was feeling.

"Everything hurts," whispered Dean as Cas and Gabe gently lowered him into the chair he'd kicked earlier. "I don't know what's wrong with me. It's not supposed to be like this, is it?" He glanced up at their distraught faces with ashamed eyes. 

"No," choked out Gabriel and Dean released another whimper.

"I don't understand what my body wants me to do. The bonds are torture but I can't stand to be without them. They're agony, but I don't want to close them; I _can't_ close them," whispered Dean as he huddled in on himself. "I'm so broken."

A wave of fierce protectiveness and fury that Dean was being hurt crashed into the older Winchester's soul with an unbelievable amount of force, and Dean couldn't help the frustrated sob at the immediate burst of pain that shot through his heart, ricocheted through his soul and exploded in his brain.

He doubled over, leaning into the angels as they caught him again.

"Tell me what to do," he pleaded, tears rolling down his cheeks and both Gabriel and Castiel looked grief-stricken as they held his hopeless gaze.

It was Castiel who made the first move. He placed his hand over Dean's heart and closed his eyes in concentration as he used his grace to prod at Dean's soul. Dean was surprised to feel no pain from the action and was torn between shoving the intruding tendril away, or embracing it and never letting it go.

He wanted to scream.

After a few seconds, Castiel frowned. "Gabriel?" He murmured and immediately the archangel was crouching beside him, poking at Dean's soul as the seraph's grace retreated. There was no pain there either.

After three minutes, Gabriel's thick scowl would have been enough to stop a clock as he slowly pulled his grace from Dean's soul.

Castiel stared at his brother anxiously and Dean finally noticed Sam hovering worriedly to the side, expression caught somewhere between terrified and wanting to kill whatever creature was harming his brother.

The archangel shook his head slowly. "I've never seen anything like it," he muttered uncomfortably and Cas stiffened at the news.

Dean gulped. What could possibly disturb an archangel?

"What?" He croaked. "What's wrong with me?"

Gabriel glanced at him with frightening unease.

"Part of your soul is hidden. Locked away. I can't get access to it which is pretty much impossible considering I'm an archangel and I have access to every soul, every grace, every spark that makes up every living being in the Universe. That's more access than any other angel, yet I still can't reach yours. It's sealed away; protected by... something I can't identify."

Suddenly, a flicker of fear passed behind the archangel's eyes.

"Dean, it's as though whatever this thing is has bound itself to you. It's made a mark on your soul, and that mark has bled into you heart and mind."

Dean swallowed quietly. "It's claimed me," he stated. "It's chained me to it and it's jealous or furious with the bonds I share with you, so it's causing me to suffer." 

He felt his hands beginning to tremble. Why was he so messed up?

"You _aren't_ ," growled Castiel, startling Dean with his fierceness. He placed a grounding hand on the human's shoulder. "We'll figure this out, Dean. I promise you we'll find whatever is causing this and wipe it from existence."

Dean's eyes widened, his heart warming at his friend's words. He didn't think he'd ever heard the normally placid angel sounding so vicious, so protective. 

And it was over _him._

Gabriel tilted his head and Dean forgot that the bonds being open allowed the angels to hear his thoughts.

"Of course we're protective over you," frowned Gabriel. "You're hurting."

Dean shook his head guiltily. "I've said so many terrible things about the bonds. I've said horrific things about you. I accused you of forcing us into these things and I accused you of deceit and betrayal. You shouldn't want anything to do with me. You should hate me."

Castiel squeezed his shoulder. "You had good reason to say those things," he said. "We had no idea you were in so much pain. That was a failure on our part." He lowered his head shamefully and Dean reached out to gently touch his arm. They shared a glance; one of understanding, apology and reassurance before Castiel slowly dropped his hand.

Dean immediately missed the contact.

"How do we find something you guys can't get access to?" Asked Sam quietly, still looking shaken and Dean felt his stomach drop. That was a good point.

Even Castiel and Gabriel deflated at that.

"We'll work something out," stated Gabriel, thoughts racing a mile a minute as to what could block an archangel and be able to lock onto Dean's soul and keep it hidden. What could invoke such a strong emotional and physical reaction within a human's soul?

There were limited options, if any. A powerful-enough witch may have been able to block an archangel's grace and conflict the soul, but the only witch Gabriel knew of with that kind of power was Rowena. Dean's pain had started before they met up with Rowena so it wasn't looking likely that she had caused it.

Still...

"Do you think it's a spell?" Asked Dean, picking up on the archangel's thoughts through the bond. "Or a curse?" Rowena's curses never ended well for any of the victims.

Gabriel rolled his shoulders uncomfortably, mimicking the movement of his wings shifting in frustration, despite not having his wings out.

"It could be, but it's unlikely. You said the pain started a while ago?"

Dean nodded. "What else could it be then?"

Gabriel shook his head slowly. "I'm not sure," he admitted miserably. His grace was erratic at the thought that Dean was suffering, not just because they considered one another family, but because the bonds were fooling Gabriel's brain into believing the human was his mate, despite Dean having repeatedly refused that title.

There was a dreadfully long moment of silence as the reality of the situation set in. Dean may have to suffer this torture forever, especially now that Gabriel and Castiel had had such a strong reaction to his distress when they first arrived. The bonds had strengthened significantly and it would be extremely difficult to break them, even for Rowena.

Dean choked back a fearful sob and Cas twitched towards him, but held back; he knew Dean wasn't fond of blatant displays of affection when he thought they made him look weak and vulnerable.

"I _am_ weak and vulnerable," laughed Dean humourlessly as a few more tears rolled down his cheeks, and this time, Cas didn't hesitate to gather the human into his arms.

Dean leaned into the touch, glad for Cas' angelic strength so he could easily support Dean's trembling frame. He didn't know, but Cas' ethereal wings had just curved around him protectively as he buried his face into the angel's neck, and Gabriel's face crumpled at the heartbreaking scene.

His flock was hurting and there was nothing he could do about it. His grace wanted to tear itself in half.

After a few moments of Castiel holding Dean and stoking soothing lines down his back, Dean sniffled and pulled away, his mask of gruff bravado slipping back into place after being so exposed.

The others refused to say anything; if Dean needed to do that to distract him from the agony inside his warring body, then who were they to stop him?

"There's been a couple of mass murders in town. One in a park, one at a church." Dean's voice was hoarser than he'd expected, but no one mentioned it. "A witness mentioned something about a pretty, young woman in a black evening gown being at the centre of it all."

"You thinking Amara?" Asked Sam, troubled by how they couldn't do anything for his brother when he was in so much agony.

Dean nodded. "I can't think of anyone else who would want to target a bunch of religious preachers and a Christian church."

"We need to find a way to trap her pretty soon," sighed Sam and Dean pulled a face before glancing at his brother.

"We've been trying to do that for months," he said warningly, as if he already knew where the conversation was heading. "The minute we find something, we'll go out there, guns blazing and throw her back into whatever hole she came out of."

Sam closed his eyes. "We already have something, Dean. If you'd just give it a chance-"

"How many times do I have to tell you it's a terrible idea?" Snapped Dean and the comment made Sam throw his hands up. They'd had this conversation too often.

"About as many times as I have to say _'okay, then what else we got?'_ " The pair averted their gaze exasperatedly, before Sam spoke again.

"Dean, ordinarily, I'd agree with you... but the visions only happen when I reach out to God. I asked him how to beat the darkness and the visions got more specific." He paused as he shifted uncomfortably. "And... I was in the cage."

Gabriel winced at the memory of Lucifer touching Sam's face. The nightmare had occurred four days ago and the sharp image of his brother had startled him as it trickled through his bond with Sam. Castiel had been as equally disturbed; Sam's visions were growing more detailed, as if they were trying to lead him somewhere or get him to do something.

"Yeah, with _Lucifer_ ," stressed Dean, as though saying it out loud would get his brother to realise how bad of an idea his current line of thought was. "The biggest monster ever to have hatched; fan-freakin'-tastic!"

Sam frowned. "You know what? Lucifer _was_ the biggest monster ever hatched, until you and I hatched one even worse!"

Dean glanced away guiltily before Sam continued.

"Listen, in the vision, Lucifer... touches me..." Dean gave him a weird look. "And I feel... calm. As if everything's going to be alright. And that's not something I'd come up with. If Lucifer touched me, that would be the last thing I'd think-"

"Yeah, if Lucifer touched you, that would be the last thing you'd think. _Ever_ ," interrupted Dean. "Why would God even ask you for this and you know, what proof do we have that any of this is even real?"

An awkward pause.

"There was a burning bush," came Sam's quiet voice. Castiel and Gabriel whipped their heads around to look at him. They hadn't heard this part of the story. Dean looked as though he wasn't sure whether to laugh or throw something.

"You were in the forest?" Dean asked and Sam nodded before Dean glared at him. "There are bushes in the forest," he said slowly as if talking to a small child, "and sometimes, they burn!"

Sam ducked his head, frowning irritatedly at his brother's stubborn view.

"You know what? Maybe there is something to it all." Sam glanced up at the soft voice. "And maybe there's not," continued Dean.

Sam closed his eyes. "Dean, doesn't it make sense that Lucifer would know how to end the Darkness? He was there."

Dean's mouth pursed into a thin line. "So was Gabriel. And he can't do it on his own. What makes you think Lucifer can?"

"Because Michael's in there with him," piped up Gabriel finally, looking defeated. "And maybe three archangels might have a shot at locking her away again."

Cas shuffled closer to his brother, offering silent support. They'd already had this conversation about letting Sam near the Cage. That's how Castiel had found out about all the archangels being mated in the first place. Gabriel didn't like the idea, but he had already admitted he couldn't see another way.

Dean blinked in shock. "You're kidding? You're on his side? You're okay with him talking to your psychotic brothers?"

Gabriel scowled. "I'm not the least bit okay with it, but Sam's got a point. Castiel and I, we've seen the visions over the bonds and even we've got to admit, they seem pretty specific."

"We have to act quickly, Dean. The Darkness is causing too much destruction to be ignored." Castiel softened his gaze. "If Sam is in any way at risk, we'll pull him out of there as quick as possible. But it's worth a try."

Dean's scowl wavered before he eventually sighed.

"Fine. But he's not going in the cage with those two. We have to find another way that keeps him out of Lucifer or Michael's grasp."

The two Winchesters glanced at each other for a moment before reaching the same decision.

"Crowley."

 

* * *

 

About half way through Sam and Dean's confrontation with Crowley, Gabriel and Castiel stiffened and lost track of the conversation. They were still in the Bunker, not wanting to reveal themselves to Crowley in case the demon picked up on their bonds and the situation with Dean became clear. They didn't need to put either Winchester at any more of a disadvantage than they already were, but it didn't stop them from paying attention to the meeting through Sam's bonds (and to a lesser extent, Dean's). If the demon tried anything, Cas and Gabe would know about it.

They didn't count on the disturbance in angel radio, though. It must have been something pretty important if both Gabriel and Castiel had received it, as Gabe was trying to keep a low profile from Heaven and Castiel wasn't exactly the most well-liked angel in the Host.

There were murmurs of a full angel strike on the Darkness. A time and place to meet; a truce between factions for a short while.

Castiel glanced at his brother when the archangel let out a snort.

"It won't work," he muttered ominously and the younger angel's mouth drew into a thin line.

"Let us hope you are wrong, brother."

 

* * *

 

Crowley's plan to get Sam an audience with Lucifer involved Rowena, and having fled the warehouse and therefore Dean's anger before she had made an attempt to break his agonising bonds, the witch had demanded he not be present when she read through the Book of the Damned to work out which spells she needed for the upcoming challenge.

Dean had begrudgingly agreed providing Sam called him when they were ready to go to the cage, so he could join them. 

A tense alliance had formed, with Gabriel and Castiel listening through the bonds.

Whilst he was waiting, Dean decided to investigate the church, to see if there were any witnesses who could provide further information on if it truly was Amara who had committed the murders.

As he left the church, with little to show for his efforts, he paused, a sense of _wrongness_ washing over him and the guy trying to hand him a hotdog seemed to slow in his movements. In fact, everything around him seemed to slow down, as if he was watching it all from a distance.

His phone rang, snapping him out of his strange haze. _Sam._

He and Rowena must have found something; maybe a way to keep Sam out of the cage and now Sam was probably calling him to tell him he could make his way over to them.

Except... something was stopping him from answering the call. His soul was twitching, tugging him to someplace, and this wasn't the part that was connected to the mating bonds.

He turned to find Amara smiling patiently at him.

"You felt my presence. That's why you came here," she said as his feet led him towards her without him giving them permission to do so.

When she touched his arm, he felt the parts of his being that were in support of his bonds flinch as if burned. Yet a darker part of his soul welcomed the contact, silently begging for more. 

He knew there was a reason he should be averse to being this close to her, but he couldn't quite grasp it as his mind fogged over, his thoughts and focus homing in on her.

He barely recognised the pulse of curiosity from Castiel and Gabriel.

Then suddenly, he wasn't outside the church anymore. There were no children in the nearby park and there was no hotdog vender. It looked like he'd been transported to a nature reserve, which his brain was slowly coming to realise that that was a very bad situation to be in. He had no idea where his car was, how far away from civilisation he was, and there was no one else in the area to help him or even witness if anything happened to him.

Amara was observing him from a few feet away and he took a few moments to look at her. She was certainly older than he remembered; a pretty face with large, expressive eyes. But there was a more sinister kind of beauty about her underneath the the artificial layers. Dean had a feeling only he could see it though.

His soul twitched again.

"You grew up," he said, looking for something to say so his newfound nervousness at being alone didn't show in his body language.

"Yes," she replied simply.

Dean felt himself gulp. He didn't know whether it was out of anxiousness or... _something else._

"So this is you now?"

She seemed amused by him. "At least for today."

She stared at him for a little longer and her expression dimmed, confusion pulling at her features before she spoke again.

"I see the wariness in your eyes," she began. "The mistrust. I don't blame you."

The tone was off, as though she'd seen something in him that she hadn't expected, nor wanted.

"Do you?" He asked, because there was a faint ache in his soul and heart; the parts that were usually excited at the mating bonds' presences protesting this new situation. For them to start hurting meant there was something seriously wrong. Yet the other parts of his soul and heart seemed content. It was like a switch had been flipped and suddenly his whole body was working backwards.

It worried him that being in Amara's presence didn't cause him half as much pain as having his bonds with Cas and Gabe open did.

He seemed to run on autopilot for the following backstory of the Darkness' intentions on Earth. He answered when he was supposed to but he was more focused on the way half his body was trying to recoil from Amara and the other half was trying to close the distance between them.

Then Amara said something that got his attention.

"What if there were no rules? No pain, no prayer. Just... bliss." She smiled knowingly as she stepped closer and Dean was surprised by the pulse of curiousness that entered his soul. 

It wasn't from Gabriel or Castiel.

A sharp bolt of pain raced through his heart.

"That feeling that you have when you're with me," murmured Amara and suddenly alarms blared in Dean's mind as his brain tried to process what was going on.

"For everyone. Forever," she continued and Dean struggled to make sense of all the mixed signals going on inside him as they intensified a few notches.

"What is it exactly that you want?" Dean asked and he wasn't sure if he was asking what she wanted from him specifically or the world in general. "When you make a world of bliss and peace; what's in it for you?" He wasn't sure he could handle an answer to the other question.

"I want what I deserve," she answered, looking slightly annoyed by his hostility; obviously she hadn't expected him to be so conflicted.

"Which is?" He demanded and her irritation grew.

"Everything."

"Everything?"

"I was the beginning and I will be the end. I will be all that there is," she said and the parts of Dean in favour of his mating bonds surged with an unusual anger and defensiveness.

"So you're it?" Dean asked, temporarily broken out of the foggy haze he usually felt when around Amara. The violent protest of his heart and soul were sobering and for once, he was thankful of the bonds. He felt the sudden urge to protect them and Amara was threatening all that.

He turned away from her, making it seem as though he was contemplating her words as he pulled a blade from his inside pocket.

"That would make you God," he said and she huffed out a laugh.

"No. God is the Light. I am the Dark."

"Then what?" 

"That's all you need to know for now."

He paused for a moment, focusing on the parts of his soul that were outraged at Amara's presence and it fuelled his adrenaline enough for him to whirl around and plunge the blade into her stomach.

...Except it shattered on impact, leaving her unharmed.

Fear filled his being. He had missed his shot and now Amara was going to make him pay the price for his foolishness.

"You had to know that was pointless," she said archly and a burst of irritation flared in his soul. Once again, it wasn't from Castiel or Gabriel.

"I know you're a warrior and you're instinct is to resist. But I can't be resisted," she smirked and Dean felt parts of himself panic at the accompanying flare of desire within his soul. Whether it was him or from an outside source, Dean couldn't be certain.

What was happening? He was only supposed to have two bonds, but the more he focused on the foreign emotions entering his soul, the more he recognised the third bond; one very different from the accidental but affectionate ones he shared with Gabriel and Castiel.

This other bond was linked to the hidden part of his soul; the part Gabriel and Castiel couldn't get access to. It was dark and strong, and borne out of force and old magic. It was manipulative and unlike the bonds with the angels, this third bond could bend his free will however it wanted; it could shape his emotions and thoughts to its advantage and there was nothing Dean could do to close it. It was powerful and it terrified Dean to realise how much control it could have over him if it so wished.

Then Amara cupped his cheek and opened her mouth as if to swallow his soul and Dean knew this was it. He would never see his brother or the angels ever again and the lighter parts of his heart and soul contorted in agony at that.

Nothing happened.

Amara seemed confused and Dean's eyes widened at another poke at his soul from the third bond.

She crushed their lips together.

Agony flared through his being as his body warred with itself more viciously than it ever had before. 

His first thought was his hidden bond was linked to _Amara_ , and he nearly collapsed under the weight of the invasive probing she was performing upon his soul. Her energy cracked through his body, exploring every part of him in a way that physically hurt and when she came to the bonds he shared with Cas and Gabe, the puzzlement and then sharp outrage was horrifying.

Her energy attacked the bonds violently, attempting to sever them cruelly, but they held fast and her onslaught only grew more painful.

She tore at them, bruising and slashing them until they were raw and inflamed and her jealousy was evident as she tried to hide his soul from them, staking her claim on the older Winchester.

Dean wanted to sob, but he couldn't because she was mapping out his mouth with her tongue despite his body screeching at him how wrong it all was.

Her energy filled every crevice of him until there wasn't a part of him that hadn't been brutally marked by her and still, she continued to claw at the rival bonds, maiming them until they were nearly shredded.

But then, Gabriel and Castiel's fury and rage were thundering through the weakened links along with their graces, attacking Amara's energy with a protectiveness that winded Dean.

It took him a moment to process the way Gabriel and Castiel were attempting to force Amara out of Dean and he was surprised by their audacity considering the being they were fighting was a lot more powerful and older than they were, but then Dean realised which feeling was at the forefront of their attack.

 _Protectiveness._ Protectiveness over Dean and their bond and the desire to keep Dean safe from Amara's painful clutches as they shoved and clawed at her unwelcome energy.

He helped them to eject her from his body and her surprise was clear. Surprise that quickly morphed into blinding fury as she was forced out.

He startled slightly when Gabriel and Castiel embraced him carefully with their graces, soothing his battered soul and attempting to heal part of the torn links, and for the first time ever, Dean didn't feel any pain from the hidden part of his soul.

He allowed them to cradle his being, leaning into their hold and pulsing gratefulness and tender affection into their graces. The two energies brightened joyfully, warming him and calming his beaten soul, heart and mind, before they gently eased away, not wanting the bonds to become any more inflamed when they began to ache.

Dean missed the contact.

He pushed away from Amara, not under the same trance he usually slipped into when he was around her as she glared at him.

"What was that?" He demanded. God's sister or not, she had no right to force him into something like that. She had invaded his privacy; exposed him in a way he wasn't willing to offer her.

"The future," she answered, but she didn't look happy. In fact she looked like she was ready to smite Gabriel and Castiel.

Dean wouldn't let that happen.

"The inevitable result of our first meeting; what you've been feeling since that moment. What we both felt. That we're bonded."

Dean stiffened and he felt Gabriel and Castiel prepare for flight.

 _'Don't,'_ he whispered through their bonds. _'She won't kill me, but you, she will.'_

They were uneasy, wariness seeping through their bonds, but they did as ordered.

Dean thought he caught a hint of possessiveness from them. Were they jealous too?

"You're the one who set me free," she said as if trying to get him to understand that she was the one he should want, not them.

"No, that was an accident," he stated, because there was no way he'd want her; not like he wanted Gabriel and Castiel.

He froze at his own thoughts. Had he really just considered that?

Amara must have caught it too because she scowled and Dean rethought his stance on her killing him. Gabriel and Castiel were oddly quiet.

"It was destiny," she announced. "You bore the mark; I am the original mark." Her tone was almost desperate as she pulled back her dress to reveal the Mark of Cain and Dean thought she sounded like a person who was frantically trying to get their crush to like them back.

Then, her demeanour changed and she was every bit the God-like presence that all creatures feared.

"You and I _will_ be together," she stated and Dean almost cowered at her imposing tone, but then he searched out the bonds, frayed and shredded as they were, and suddenly he realised he had something to be strong for; something to defend and protect. Maybe even some _one_...

"No," he growled. "No, that's not gonna happen."

Gabriel and Castiel were oddly silent over the bond, but Dean could tell they were listening in, watching and trying to figure out his intentions.

"It's so simple, Dean. We will become one. Why wouldn't you want that?" Amara demanded and Dean saw the crack in her facade; the uncertainty in her eyes as she realised she had competition that was a lot stronger than she first thought.

"Amara! You are going to surrender to us and the judgement of Heaven!" Commanded a new voice and both Dean and Amara turned to find three angels glaring at them, blades firmly wedged between their fingers.

"Why ever would I submit to anything of God's creation?" Asked Amara haughtily and Dean had a nasty idea where this was going; even Castiel and Gabriel were suddenly telling Dean to get out of there, quick.

"Tell your master to come fetch me himself," dismissed Amara, but the angels weren't done.

"All of Heaven's on high alert. If you resist, each and every angel in the skies will smite you in a single unified blow."

"Not even you could survive-" began another angel before Dean felt the need to cut in. 

"Woah, woah, woah, fellas. Dial it down a bit, okay? Look, if you take her out, a whole bunch of people are gonna die." Gabriel and Castiel were hurriedly explaining that their plan wouldn't work and Amara would be able to survive the blast, and she would want revenge afterwards. They begged Dean to escape. 

Amara shot him a devastated glance as she picked up on where his thoughts lay.

"We're at the point where sacrifice is inevitable," stated one angel coldly, before advancing towards the pair.

Amara raised her hand.

"Amara, no!" Yelled Dean, hoping she would listen to him and that no one would have to die here.

Too late. The angel convulsed in agony before his grace faded out and he dropped to the ground. 

Gabriel and Castiel screamed at him to leave as another angel advanced before Amara impaled him on his own sword. The third angel she disintegrated.

Cas and Gabe got ready for flight.

Dean snarled at them to stay where they were. He wouldn't lose them and watch helplessly as Amara merely flicked her wrist and slaughtered them both.

"What have you done?" Hissed Dean as the skies darkened and lightened whipped across them, thunder roaring ominously in the background. "It's coming. They will smite you," whispered Dean, urging Amara to leave or apologise or do something that wouldn't result in the deaths of hundreds of people and angels alike.

"Maybe now he'll hear me," she murmured before her gaze fell on Dean.

There was a look of sadness in her eyes; rejection almost. Dean was struck with the startling revelation that she knew she'd lost him to Cas and Gabe.

She waved her palm at him like a twisted farewell and suddenly, Dean was back outside the church, being handed a hotdog.

His soul was no longer in pain. 

Neither was his head nor his heart. In fact, his body was at peace with itself and he realised his bond with Amara had significantly weakened, to the point where he could barely feel its existence. It was also closed.

From Amara's end.

He looked around, wondering where to go to from there.

 

* * *

 

Castiel and Gabriel stood staring at one another wordlessly. Dean was safe but he was unsure. He'd admitted a lot to himself during the confrontation with Amara that he probably wasn't ready for and now he knew that Gabriel and Castiel had been witness to it all, he was having doubts about himself.

"He believes he's been tainted by Amara," muttered Castiel and Gabriel pulled a face. 

"What is it with Winchesters thinking they're dirty?"

Cas shook his head. "He thinks when Amara blended her energy with his being that it somehow made him unclean. A monster."

The archangel scowled. "She scent marked him and now he thinks he's worthless?"

Cas glanced at his brother sadly. "Much like Sam, Dean has always believed he's worthless. Now he believes he's worse than the things he hunts."

Gabriel's grace was radiating irritation and exasperation.

"I suppose we better go fix him then," he stated and Cas quirked a smile at his brother.

Just as they unleashed their wings, there was a unified battle cry over angel radio and Cas and Gabe hesitated as they felt all their brothers and sisters band together and focus all their grace and energy on a single epicentre.

_Amara._

The strike was intense and furious as thousands of angels attempted to destroy the Darkness at once, battering their graces down upon her. Then, all was silent.

The brothers shared a worried glance. Not a single angel in the entirety of the host was speaking, and the pair couldn't be certain if their siblings were too stunned at what had occurred... or if they were all dead. 

It was a horrifying thought, but who knew what Amara was capable of?

"Find Dean," ordered Gabriel. "And I'll check in with Heaven."

"Are you certain you want to reveal yourself?" Asked Castiel. Gabriel may have been hunting with them, but he hadn't yet informed Heaven of his decidedly undead state. After all that had taken place upstairs, the archangels weren't exactly the most popular characters with the lower angels. 

For Gabriel to return after so many millennia of being hidden, it was almost certain that his siblings would resent him; especially after all the lies they had been fed. 

Castiel wasn't fond of the idea that his mate could die at the hands of their brothers and sisters. If they were alive, that is.

"Desperate times," smiled Gabriel bitterly as he raised his hand to click.

Castiel grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and tugged him into a passionate kiss.

Gabriel melted against him as he wrapped his arms around his mate, tasting the younger angel's mouth and savouring the feeling of him being so close as if it were his last kiss for the rest of eternity.

Castiel refused to think how it could be if the attack on the Darkness had failed.

They brushed their wings together as they curled around each other's bodies, melding their graces desperately in order to make the moment last, before Gabriel reluctantly pulled away, with one last gentle caress to his mate's cheek.

"I'll be back," he murmured. "Promise."

Castiel caught his wrist and placed his lips to the archangel's knuckles.

"Your flock will be waiting."

Gabriel beamed at him and Cas couldn't help but smile back as their bond ignited with love and determination.

"I love you, Cas."

"I love you too."

With a tender gaze, the archangel vanished.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, look! Actual dialogue from episode 9!
> 
> Things are getting intense guys! Next up: the Cage... 
> 
> Tell me if you liked this chapter or not!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick warning: There's a bit of violence at the end, but there is a point to it :)

Rowena began the incantation and a flame flared around the unforgiving cage. It was nowhere near as sinister as the one Sam had seen in his visions, yet there was something about it that made a burst of fear strike his heart.

He desperately wanted to reach out to his mates, to seek out comfort and reassurance whilst he was here in this terrifying place where thunder roared and lightning clashed and the atmosphere reeked of death and hatred, but he knew he couldn't. He'd told Cas and Gabe he was going to keep the bonds shut so Lucifer and Crowley couldn't easily detect they were bonded when they were still new to the connections and couldn't properly control them.

Initially, the angels had refused, demanding he keep them open so they could rescue him immediately if anything went wrong, but after Sam had explained he needed to know they were safe from Lucifer and Michael for his own state of mind, they reluctantly agreed, providing he tore the bonds open if it even looked like something was going to go wrong.

He had consented and the angels had wrapped him up in their wings, kissing the breath out of him in the short time they had together before he had to accompany Rowena and Crowley to Hell.

Sam had given himself to them, letting them do whatever they wanted with him in those brief minutes, and they had poured _love_ and _desire_ and _need_ over their bonds as he attempted to shove as much affection and want back to them.

They kissed him and held him close in those too-short stolen moments, and they whispered words of comfort and sweet promises into his ear for when he returned, telling him how hard it would be for them to not be able to feel his beautiful soul brushing their graces; to not be able to embrace his large heart or feel his many emotions inside their beings. 

They murmured how he was meant to be with them; how he belonged with them and how they wouldn't be able to cope if anything happened to him, and in return he told them how grateful he was to have them and how he was looking forward to returning home as soon as possible so they could strengthen their bonds.

The angels nuzzled at him in approval as they blended their graces with his being, leaving temporary splashes of blue and gold in his otherwise white soul, marking him as theirs.

"Your brothers," Sam had protested in horror and Gabriel shook his head as Castiel sent a pulse of soothing through their bond.

"By the time you get down there, they'll have faded," Gabriel murmured before stealing a needy kiss and Sam had relaxed into his mates, trusting them in a way he'd never realised he'd craved.

He'd pressed his lips against their wings, smiling at how the feathers tickled his nose and both angels had gazed at him tenderly, as though he was their entire world and Sam felt years of self-loathing and worthlessness crumble away, just a little as he stroked their wings.

"You're just possessive," he'd chuckled quietly and Gabriel had grinned wolfishly as Castiel nipped at the curve of his neck.

"Of you? Always," whispered Gabe as he claimed Sam's mouth again.

Then, Rowena had entered the room, raising her eyebrows at them pointedly and Castiel and Sam had both flushed pink at being caught, taking a step away from each other. Gabriel, on the other hand, had tugged Sam into his wings again and captured his lips roughly, just to prove that he didn't care about the witch's judgement. She already knew about their bonds anyway.

Sam had stumbled away from him, but there was a tiny smile lighting his face and Gabriel couldn't help but wink at his human as Rowena rolled her eyes as she dragged Sam from the room.

Now Sam wished he was back in his mates' wings, being kissed and cradled instead of staring at a terrible cage and waiting for two of Earth's biggest threats to make an appearance whilst the King of Hell and an infuriating witch observed beside him.

Suddenly, the flames surrounding the cage surged upwards as Rowena finished the spell, the heat radiating from them almost unbearable and Sam was forced to take a step backwards. Even Crowley had to turn his head.

Behind the flames, a figure formed, familiar and ominous as it faced its audience. Sam's breath caught in his throat when two inhuman, golden eyes stared directly at him; nothing like the warm, honey gaze of the creature's equally powerful younger brother. These were like a serpent's eyes; cold and calculating as they eyed Sam like a piece of meat.

He forced himself to stop thinking of his mates; Lucifer was adept at reading minds, like every other angel.

Sam vaguely wondered where Michael was.

The flames died down and Lucifer took a step forward, his eyes returning to something more human as he completely bypassed Sam to stare amusedly at the only demon in the area.

"My old friend Crowley," he hummed as he leaned on the bars of the cage.

Sam really hoped Rowena's warding was foolproof.

"A mere acolyte carrying your torch," replied Crowley, tone guarded and Lucifer chuckled.

"You're too kind... to yourself."

Crowley's face fell as Lucifer eyed him with contempt. Rowena looked oddly ecstatic.

"What do you want of me?" Murmured Lucifer lowly and Sam stepped back into his field of vision, pulse racing and throat dry as he forced himself to look up at the creature that had once tried to destroy the world, using him to do it.

Something flashed behind Lucifer's eyes, something like anger, before the lazy smile was back in place.

"Sam Winchester. My old roomie," he teased and Sam held down the urge to be physically sick. He remembered all the things Lucifer and Michael had done to him and Adam in Hell. All the torture and suffering, only to be built back up again for the archangels to start over. He had been so certain the torment was going to last for eternity. 

They hadn't even let him kill himself.

He had never told Dean how many times he had tried to end his own life whilst trapped in that Cage with Michael and Lucifer; the memories too agonising to bear as Lucifer and Michael tore at his soul and mutilated his body, and he hoped that Gabriel and Castiel never found out. 

The two archangels kept rebuilding him and Adam, breaking them and maiming them until they begged for death; Adam cracked far quicker than Sam, but even the older hunter couldn't resist the sweet promise of rest for too long.

Michael and Lucifer had refused their requests. They said they needed something to occupy their time with; and all of eternity could get pretty boring.

Sam's soul had never quite fully healed.

Now, he was standing in front of one of the monsters that had tortured him and the memories were resurfacing; he didn't even know what had become of Adam. 

It was almost too much. He almost turned tail and ran, but the Earth was at stake and they really needed the archangel's help if they were to save it.

Besides, Sam had something to live for now; something to inspire courage in him, and he would protect those things until the end, until he had no breath left in him to fight. He wasn't going to give up Gabriel and Castiel for anything.

He hastily stamped down on his thoughts; no use in letting Lucifer know what was going through his mind.

Another flicker of irritation slipped behind the archangel's eyes before it was gone as quickly as it appeared.

"How can I help you?" He smirked in a way that reminded Sam of Gabriel, but with much sharper edges and an underlying slyness.

"Gotta say, I'm a little in the dark about this meeting," murmured Lucifer, running his fingers across the bars of the cage. "Am I up for parole? Time off for bad behaviour?" 

An almost bitter look crossed his face. "I don't really do visitors."

Sam swallowed his fear and pulled a leaf from Dean's book as he donned a mask of false confidence. 

"If it weren't for the crisis topside, you wouldn't be getting one now."

"Crisis?" Lucifer asked in surprise.

"You're aware of the Darkness?" Sam queried and Lucifer hissed as he pulled a face.

" _Yikes._ That doesn't sound good. Um... I'm aware of what she was, but that was eons ago."

Sam nodded. That couldn't be good if even Lucifer seemed troubled by her. 

"She's been released. So now she's somewhere, or everywhere, on Earth."

Lucifer looked particularly intrigued. "However did that happen?"

Sam averted his gaze guiltily as he felt Lucifer quirking his lips at him. He clenched his jaw; he wouldn't be intimidated by the monster before him; not when it was trapped in a cell.

"The point is she poses a threat to all that exists, including you."

Lucifer hummed mockingly. "Which leads me to my next question... where's the big burrito himself? Where's God in all this?" 

Sam huffed. "All current indications of his presence show that there are... no... current indications of his... presence..." Sam trailed off uncomfortably, suddenly feeling very alone and wishing he hadn't made the decision to keep the bonds closed. Still, Lucifer couldn't know that Gabriel was alive and Cas would be no match for an archangel.

"What? Caught the fun bus out of town?" Grinned Lucifer and Sam was once again strongly reminded of Gabriel. "Figures."

"But..." Sam began, forcing his terror and panic into the deepest recesses of his mind. "Recently, he has reached out to an... interested party."

Lucifer hesitated, seemingly shocked. "Who?"

"Me," replied Sam, feeling as though he had the upper hand for once, now he'd caught Lucifer off-guard.

"You?" Asked Lucifer, looking excited.

"He answered my prayers," confirmed Sam.

"Did he now?" A pause. "And... what was Dad's suggestion?"

"To seek out you."

Lucifer laughed. "Get out of town! Seriously?" He shrugged. "Who'd have thunk it?"

As they conversed, Sam slowly managed to choke down his fear; enough to get the information he needed out of Lucifer and for the archangel to finally agree to helping them beat the Darkness. On one condition.

Sam be his vessel.

"Do you really expect me to agree to this?" Hissed Sam and Lucifer nodded.

The younger Winchester couldn't believe what he was hearing. 

"So what, I just disappear whilst you take my body and get set loose on the world again?!"

Lucifer grinned at him and Sam blinked away a similar image of Gabriel doing that exact expression.

Lucifer's smile faltered but Sam didn't notice it.

"I know, I know it's a lot to ask. But desperate times call for desperate measures," smirked Lucifer and Sam clenched his fists.

"That's not desperate; that's certifiable!"

He wouldn't give Lucifer free access to his body; especially not now when he was bound to Cas and Gabe. He would never put them at risk like that. He wouldn't let them suffer at the hands of this archangel who had tortured them both so much.

Suddenly, Lucifer's expression morphed into something hostile, snapping Sam out of his thoughts.

"Okay, hold on there, Cowboy. Wait a second. Take a breath." He pointed an accusing finger at Sam as anger flashed behind his eyes once again. "You have been working with Crowley. You passed certifiable three off ramps ago!"

He seemed annoyed at Sam for more than just refusing to be his vessel, but Sam couldn't put his finger on what.

He hid it with dramatic gestures and a lot of showmanship, before demanding Sam say 'yes' because it was God who had brought him to Lucifer and he couldn't refuse that.

"...No," muttered Sam quietly but firmly. "I won't do it. There has to be another way."

He turned away thereby missing the slight dim in the flames surrounding the cage.

However, he did notice the way Crowley's eyes bugged out of his head as Rowena stared on with a slow smirk creeping over her features. He whirled to face the cage and watched with absolute horror as the sigils drawn onto its base began to glow and flicker out.

Then the flames died down and he distantly heard Crowley's confused shout as the demon raced down a flight of steps. As the last of the flames withered and vanished, Sam felt a sense of foreboding about what was to come next and he tore the bonds to Cas and Gabe open, shovelling panic and fear into them.

Only for the emotions to be reflected back to him by an invisible wall.

When he next glanced up, he was staring face-to-face with Lucifer, both of them inside the cage.

"Together again," smirked Lucifer and Sam backed up, back hitting the bars of the cage in his haste to retreat. "Hey, Sam. Did you miss me? I bet you did..." the Devil goaded and Sam almost collapsed in horror as Lucifer advanced on him.

But the longer he stared at Lucifer, the more he was reminded of his visions, and he forced himself to remain calm. This is what he was meant to do. He'd already had this dream before; of Lucifer touching his face. He didn't need to be scared.

"I have to say you're extraordinarily calm given the circumstances," frowned Lucifer as he crossed his arms and Sam nodded.

"Well, it's pretty much exactly how God told me it was going to be. Guess I just have to go with it and play my hand." He poked experimentally at the bonds, lips pursing concernedly when the invisible wall stopped his exploration once again. Maybe the cage somehow stopped all communication to the outside world?

A flicker of a smirk danced over Lucifer's lips before he turned away.

"Well, I guess that would make so much sense if it was... God who was doing the talking..."

Sam paused. What?

"See, Sam," Lucifer explained, "when the Darkness descended, the impact on Hell was massive. The Cage was damaged. Through the fissures I was able to reach out..."

Then Lucifer smirked as he turned to the younger Winchester, a sadistic kind of glee flashing in his eyes.

"It wasn't God who was in your head, Sam."

_No._

"It was me."

_**No.** _

The archangel's features twisted bitterly and Sam swore he saw a deep anger there that he didn't deserve directed at him.

"So you see, he's not with you. He's never been with you. It was always. _Just. Me_ ," growled Lucifer lowly and Sam frantically tried to break down the wall stopping him from reaching Cas and Gabe. 

He clawed at it, hitting it with as much force as he could in order to make it crumble, pummelling his soul at it with as much desperation as he could muster.

Lucifer flinched.

Sam's eyes widened. This couldn't be happening. It wasn't the cage that was interfering with his bonds; it was _Lucifer._ So, did that mean the archangel knew where the ends of his bonds led, or did he only know they existed?

The wall strengthened and something jabbed invasively at the links, making Sam wince.

Lucifer was staring at him with contempt and spite as he yanked painfully at Sam's end of the bond, and the human hissed as his soul tried to shrink in on itself.

The Devil knew who he was bonded to.

"So I guess I am your only hope," taunted Lucifer as he prodded at the bond again, just to watch Sam writhe.

Suddenly the younger Winchester was bombarded with images of his own torture as Gabriel and Castiel watched on in horror, hands chained and wings nailed to the cage walls. Then Lucifer pulled away from Sam and Sam watched his own body crumple to the ground, blood and bruises littering his frame, as the twisted archangel began hacking at Castiel's wings with his blade, prompting agonised cries from the younger angel as Gabriel fought helplessly at his bindings.

When Castiel's wings were lying on the floor beside him, bloodied and mutilated, and the seraph was slumped over, sobs wracking his body as his back flowed with red, Lucifer turned to Gabriel. 

The younger archangel was forced into a possessive kiss and then a bright light surrounded both archangels as Gabriel screamed in agony, and Sam immediately knew Lucifer had merged his grace with his brother's unwilling one, in a mockery of the mating bond they had once shared. It was a display of possessiveness; to prove that if he couldn't have Gabriel, then neither could anyone else and Lucifer would make sure his ex-mate could never be desired by anyone again; not when he was bonded to the Devil for all of eternity.

Gabriel fell into his older brother's arms and cried.

Sam closed his eyes to clear the terrible images from his mind and he glared at Lucifer with a renewed sense of hatred and disgust. Nobody would harm his mates, not whilst he was still breathing. Especially not this angel, who had caused Gabriel so much pain and heartbreak already.

"That's never going to happen," snarled Sam and Lucifer quirked a twisted smile.

"Ah, well. Settle in there, buddy." He paused thoughtfully before grinning. 

"Hey, roomie? Upper bunk, lower bunk..." He advanced on Sam predatorily, eyes glinting with the intent to make him suffer in any and every way possible. 

"...Or do you want to share?"

 

* * *

 

The bonds with Sam were quiet, so when Gabriel left Cas to find Dean whilst he paid a visit to Heaven to see what was going on, he had no reason to think Sam was in trouble.

When he crept into Heaven using a back door, he was more than a little concerned by the empty corridors and angel-less halls. Surely his brothers and sisters couldn't all be dead?

Then again, Amara seemed pretty powerful...

 _"Gabriel?"_

The archangel jumped at the stunned voice and turned to find one of his younger sisters gaping at him as though he were a ghost come back to haunt Heaven.

"But you... you died! Everyone felt it," the angel stuttered, taking a step backwards.

Maybe there was some truth to the ghost metaphor after all.

Gabriel flashed her a dazzling smile as he always did when he was nervous.

"Surprise?" He tried holding out his hands to show her he was currently unarmed and not a threat.

She opened her mouth to say something before snapping it shut again as a scowl made its way onto her features. Her blade dropped into her palm.

Gabriel felt a sense of disappointment enter his grace. It wasn't like the hostility and wariness was unexpected, but he hated how distrusting his siblings had become.

"Sachael," said Gabriel quietly. "It really is me."

"You died," accused Sachael, her startlingly blue eyes reminding Gabriel of Castiel. "Lucifer stabbed you. All of Heaven felt it."

Gabriel grimaced at her tone before glancing at her sadly.

"You're right. I did die. I was in The Void for years before Metatron accidentally pulled me out. Now I'm back at full power."

Sachael narrowed her eyes at him. "You're not welcome here, Gabriel."

The archangel deflated. That hurt. 

A tendril of soothing slithered through his bond from Castiel, letting him know at least one of his siblings still loved him, and it encouraged him to talk with Sachael; to make her understand what his intentions were.

"I know," he murmured. "But I also know the Darkness has escaped and is threatening all of existence. I may be able to help you with that."

Sachael flicked her ebony hair dismissively. "She's been taken care of." The younger angel scowled at him. "We've become well-adept at functioning without you, brother."

Gabriel's expression fell. "I should have been here for you."

"Instead, you abandoned us and left us to suffer Michael and Lucifer's constant fighting and Raphael's unwillingness to even talk to us, so you could what? Play house with the Pagans?" Growled a voice from behind them and Gabriel whirled to find about a dozen angels glaring disgustedly at him, blades at the ready.

Gabriel closed his eyes. "I'm sorry. I never should have left you."

"No, you shouldn't have," hissed another voice. "We were afraid and lost, and you turned your back on us when we needed you most!"

"I'm so sorry," whispered Gabriel, grace cracking.

" _Sorry?_ " Snarled the angel at the front of the pack. Ramiel, if Gabriel remembered correctly. "You abandoned us! Do you have any idea what we went through?"

Gabriel opened his mouth to reply but Ramiel cut him off.

"Lucifer and Michael did nothing but argue with each other and then they started to truly fight. With blades and wings and grace. They tore one another apart until Lucifer finally fell. Heaven was never the same warm paradise it had been after that. Michael treated us like chess pieces. We were just soldiers to him, nothing more and Raphael? Raphael wouldn't even acknowledge us anymore. 

"Then the apocalypse started and all Michael cared about was killing Lucifer once and for all. When Raphael slowly started talking to us again, we thought things were going to go back to some sort of normalcy. We thought he was going to lead us back to bliss and peace. But he didn't.

"He just wanted another war; he wanted an army to restart the apocalypse when Michael and Lucifer were trapped in that Cage. We meant nothing to any of you archangels. We were just ammunition. Another number to be struck off the list when we fell in the battlefield." The younger angels looked to be a mixture of heartbroken and repulsed by Gabriel and the archangel lowered his head in apology.

"That's not true. I loved all my brothers and sisters, but I was a coward and couldn't stand all the fighting. I couldn't stand to see my brothers at one another's throats." At the hateful glares, Gabriel averted his gaze, deciding to take a risk.

"I couldn't bear to see my mates tear one another apart, so I bailed."

There was a stunned silence as Gabriel sighed and looked around his younger siblings.

"You were all so young then. We never told you of our relationship, of what the four archangels meant to one another. You have every right to despise me for what I've done and how I never returned even through all that has happened over the past millennia. I'm a coward; I know that." He clenched his jaw. It was difficult admitting to all of this.

"But I'm trying to change. I know I can never make up for all my wrongdoings, but I can make a start and hope one day, you can look upon me as your brother again."

There was a weighted silence as a few angels shifted uncomfortably.

"Why are you here?" Ramiel said eventually, looking tired and Gabriel had the natural instinct to soothe his younger brother with his grace. It didn't seem appropriate though so he refrained, even if at one time, he would have had no hesitations.

"I felt the strike on Amara. I wanted to warn you that it won't have worked. She is far more powerful than you can imagine and I urge you to keep away from her. You may have weakened her, but once she gets to full power again, she'll want revenge on all of Heaven."

Another of his sisters scowled at him, emerald eyed narrowed sharply.

"We have already sent one of our people down to ensure the Darkness has truly been defeated. You're wrong; she is dead."

Gabriel frowned. "And damage control has explicitly told you this? Your representative has come back to Heaven with the affirmative on her demise?"

The angel, Ariel, hesitated. "Well... no. Not yet. But she will."

Gabriel pursed his mouth into a thin line. "Or you might just have sent her to her death."

The angels shifted uncomfortably before Ramiel straightened defensively.

"And what? You think you can get rid of her? Just because you're an archangel you think we're all going to just fall in line like good little soldiers and do whatever you say?"

"No, that's not-" Gabriel began but was immediately interrupted by Ariel.

"You archangels think you're so much better than all of us. But you were the ones who caused this mess in the first place! So maybe you can rid the Universe of the Darkness, but we will never follow you again. You abandoned us and betrayed us for the pagans. We don't care if Lucifer and Michael are your mates. We needed you when they were tearing at one another; we were so frightened and you didn't come back.

"We thought you despised us. That's what we were told. You'd grown to hate Heaven just as much as Lucifer, Michael and Raphael grew to hate one another," mumbled Ariel. "They said you'd joined the Pagans because you couldn't stand your own kind anymore."

"You were always there for us," whispered Sachael brokenly. "You had the warmest grace of all the archangels and we all adored you. You taught us how to use our wings, how to control our graces... how to love one another. And then one day... you weren't there anymore. When we were confused and afraid... your light just... _vanished._ "

"You never even said goodbye," murmured Ramiel and Gabriel could help but let his grace wash over them all. He knew it was a risky move and it left him vulnerable for attack, even if it was nowhere near as intimate as how he and Castiel shared their graces. He made sure his bonds were firmly tucked away.

He staggered backwards as over a dozen of his sibling's graces swamped his desperately, seeking out safety and comfort in a way they'd been denied or too wary to search out for too long. Sorrow and need and fear were most prominent in the onslaught, along with traces of anger and betrayal and Gabriel nearly collapsed under the weight of the sheer hurt and confusion that drowned his grace.

He radiated an aura of deep apology and reassurance, and his younger siblings slumped slightly at the blast of soothing they received from the powerful archangel. Gabriel swore he heard a quiet sob.

"I could never hate you. Any of you," he whispered as he watched their faces crumple in a mixture of relief and devastation. "You're my brothers, my sisters."

He sighed heavily. "And I failed you. I was supposed to be the big brother who protected you all; who guided you and helped you when you needed it. But I wasn't there for you and I made you all suffer for it. I'm so, so sorry."

He watched as tears rolled down some of the younger angels' faces and he continued to project comfort and guilt to them.

"I came back because after the attack there was such a horrible silence, I thought you were all dead. I wanted to check on you all; to make sure you were still alive. You are still my family after all."

His siblings' graces probed his being for the truth in his words. When his grace displayed nothing but honesty, the younger angels' graces slowly began to warm to him.

"You have every right to distrust me; to despise me; to want to hurt me. But the Darkness is a threat none of us can ignore. She needs to be disposed of," stated Gabriel hoarsely, unused to having his siblings reach out to him so desperately after so many eons without their contact.

"What would you have us do?" Murmured Ramiel weakly, eyes closed as he focused on the way Gabriel was embracing all their graces, cradling them and bathing them in the soothing and reassurance they had all been craving for millennia.

Fond amusement hinted at Gabriel's grace then, and it took the surrounding angels off-guard. They could barely remember the last time they had experienced Gabriel's light-hearted side. It was more fulfilling than they remembered and the hole in all of their graces, the one they hadn't even realised existed until now, healed over slightly.

"What happened to never following an archangel again?" Chuckled Gabriel softly and to the younger angels, his laugh was like a beautiful symphony ringing out in a music-less void.

When he received no response, Gabriel sobered. 

"I may be an archangel, but I'm not delusional. I know I can't defeat the Darkness on my own. I need your help," he said before tilting his head to one side. "But I will not use you as Michael and Raphael did. I will not manipulate you as Lucifer did; I need you to actually want to do this."

Ariel shifted uncomfortably. "Why? You are more powerful than us. You could easily force us into following you."

Gabriel quirked a small smile. "But I won't."

Sachael frowned. "But why? The other archangels had no reservations in doing so."

Gabriel's mouth drew into an unhappy line as he shook his head.

"That's because they didn't care for the difference between fear and respect." Gabriel eyed them pointedly. "I don't want your fear. I only want your aid."

The angels paused, contemplating Gabriel's words as they carefully eased their graces away from the archangel's. They had seen the sincerity in Gabriel's grace; he hadn't been lying and it made them question everything they'd believed about him.

Eventually, Ramiel glanced up at Gabriel with a thoughtful expression.

"If we were to forgive you, how could we help?"

 

* * *

 

When Castiel felt Dean's distress through their bond, he quickly located him and frowned at the picture of the older Winchester doubled over, emptying the contents of his stomach onto the road.

"Dean?" He called as he jogged over and the human must have been really disorientated because he couldn't seem to work out where the shout had come from.

"I came as soon as you called. Are you alright?" Asked Cas as he neared the pale-looking man, and he placed a grounding hand on Dean's shoulder as he used their bond to calm Dean's stomach.

"You're not alright," he murmured as Dean's eyes became unfocused again.

"Obviously," grunted Dean and he didn't even realise he had reached out to Cas' grace, silently begging for more comforting contact through their bond. Cas happily obliged and he embraced Dean's soul soothingly, ensuring the hunter knew he was safe.

"What's wrong with me?" Asked Dean groggily and Cas checked the human's physical state in a way he'd assumed Dean would be more comfortable with, but he was batted away by an exasperated hand.

"How far are we from the event?" Cas asked contemplatively.

Dean frowned. "You mean the angel nuke? About a mile down that way," he said as he nodded to the road he'd been heading down.

Castiel nodded. "That explains it; you're suffering from 'Smiting Sickness'."

Dean stared blankly at him. "That's a thing?"

"Yes. The angels, what they did, it released a tremendous amount of energy; there's fallout, so this whole area is poisoned."

"You can heal me, right?" Dean asked as his stomach began to churn again.

"No, I can't," frowned Cas. "Not fully and the closer you get to the blast site, the worse your symptoms will become." The illness was going to have to wear out on its own; Dean's whole body was trying to cope with being exposed to every angel's grace in Heaven and Cas didn't have the power to expel all that angelic energy.

It was a shame Gabriel wasn't here to help. 

"How worse?" Groaned Dean.

"The last time there was a smiting of this magnitude, Lot's wife turned to salt."

"Awesome," Dean deadpanned.

"You need to go back," Cas stated as he pulled Dean to his feet and he didn't miss the way the older Winchester unconsciously leaned into his touch. He pulsed concern over their bond when Dean gulped heavily, his stomach beginning to protest once more.

"No, we've got to see if it worked," mumbled Dean, looking ready to vomit again. Cas soothed his stomach as best he could. "See if Amara's alive or dead."

Cas scowled. Why was this human so stubborn? 

" _We_ don't. The fallout doesn't affect angels. I'll go in alone."

Dean looked ready to argue but another wave of nausea changed his mind.

"Alright, yeah, it's probably better that way. I'll take a drive and go check on Sam." He hadn't answered that call from when Sam rang him before he'd faced off with Amara; his brother and Rowena might have everything they needed to visit Hell.

"Good," murmured Cas as he allowed a faint sense of gratitude to slither across the bond.

Dean must have been very ill if he was ready to latch onto their bond that desperately. Cas was more than willing to offer comfort and he itched to reach out and hold Dean, but he knew the older Winchester was still conflicted over his feelings about the bonds and the people he shared them with, so he refrained.

"And Cas?" Dean asked as the angel began to walk away. Cas turned. "If it did work and she is dead... bring her body out." They needed to make sure there were absolutely no traces of her left.

"And if she's not?" Cas asked.

Dean paused and Cas was surprised by the worry and anxiousness radiating from Dean's end of the bond. 

"Run," Dean said with a pleading look in his eyes and Castiel felt the fear across the bond; fear for Castiel's safety; fear that he would be murdered in the same way Amara had destroyed those other three angels that had threatened her.

Cas watched Dean's memories play out across the bond; the horrifying images of the other angels' deaths and he was startled at the last thought that accidentally slipped through the bond.

Dean didn't want to lose the chance to develop their relationship into something a little deeper. He didn't want to lose his mate.

Cas' eyes widened and Dean looked away embarrassedly, not having intended to allow those specific feelings to slide through the bond. To Castiel, the action looked almost... ashamed. As if he was afraid he would be rejected.

He desperately wanted to reach out and reassure the hunter; tell him he would be ecstatic to explore their relationship a little more, but now wasn't the time. Cas knew they needed to check on the Darkness' status and Dean was definitely not doing that in his condition. 

He vowed to corner Dean later; maybe Gabriel could join him if he was back from Heaven.

With a regretful look in his eyes, Cas slowly turned away.

 

* * *

 

It pained Castiel to know that his brothers and sisters were frightened of him; that they were disgusted by his fondness for the Winchester brothers. It didn't stop him from rushing to Ambriel's rescue however, only to find that Amara had her trapped as she stole the very essence of her being.

It hurt even more when Amara sneered at him and told him he was _'expendable'_ and it wasn't _'worth the effort'_ of consuming his grace. She said he was _'used up'_ and that he reeked of fear, and when Gabriel's panic blasted through their bond, Cas gripped it tight and took guilty comfort in the fact that at least there was one person out there who loved him before he met his inevitably grizzly death.

Gabriel was frantic as he tried to work out what was going on but Cas wouldn't let him know that he was alone with Amara, as he had already felt Gabriel's progress with their siblings. He didn't want Gabriel leaving now when he could potentially rally them into fighting by his side against the Darkness. Nor would he allow Gabriel to put himself at risk by being in Amara's presence on his own; his mate's life was more important than his anyway.

The archangel didn't seem to think anything was more important than Cas though as he begged the younger angel to tell him what was happening, and when he didn't, Gabriel threatened to leave Heaven and find him.

Cas slammed the bond shut.

Gabriel would think he was irritated and didn't want to be bothered, and as much as it scared him to be alone in his final moments of life, he took some sort of satisfaction in knowing Gabriel was safe.

And then Amara sent him to Hell.

Dean looked furious when he staggered into the room he, Crowley and Rowena were occupying and Cas picked up on the anger the older Winchester held for him at not revealing Sam had already spoken to Lucifer without him.

Cas winced when he realised that in fact, _yes_ , he _had_ forgotten to tell Dean that his little brother had visited Hell whilst he was meeting with Amara. 

Cas' eyes widened however, when Dean archly informed him over their bond that not only was Sam conversing with Lucifer, he was trapped in a cage with him.

Why hadn't he felt it?

He instinctively prodded at the bond with Sam, only to find his attempts blocked by an invisible wall. 

Dean's gaze softened slightly at the flare of panic from Cas' end of the bond.

"Cas?" He asked quietly, wondering why the angel's shirt looked as though it had been mauled by a bear. "What happened?"

Cas seemed to snap back to reality as he yanked the material open.

"Amara... she's alive... she sent this message."

" _'I am coming'_?" Huffed Crowley as he stared at the painful carvings engraved into Cas' chest. "Is that a threat?"

"Or a promise," murmured Dean, but his eyes glinted with horror at seeing the angel hurt. Cas was surprised by the amount of concern and distress pouring through their bond and he reassured Dean that although it had hurt when Amara had clawed through his flesh, it was still only a superficial wound that he could heal.

Crowley squinted between them suspiciously.

There was the crack of bone hitting bone and a groan of pain from another room.

Dean's soul flooded with dread. 

"Sam!"

Both angel and hunter ignored Crowley's protest as they ran towards the terrible sounds of Lucifer tearing into Sam.

As Lucifer smashed his fist into Sam's face, causing him to crumple to the ground, Castiel felt a bubbling rage in his grace.

This archangel had caused his mates so much pain and upset; first Gabriel, then the Winchesters. He had taken everything from Gabriel all those eons ago; his flock, his mates, his siblings... even his life. He had systematically destroyed Gabriel from the inside out; he had claimed his grace only to cause him centuries of agony and heartbreak, and when he was done, he left Gabriel to face the Universe alone. All the archangels had. They had left Cas' mate feeling lost and alone when he needed love the most.

Now Lucifer had moved onto Sam and he had taunted the young hunter for years; manipulating him and chipping away at his self-worth. Then when Sam had beaten him, Lucifer and Michael tortured him in the Cage, punishing him and breaking him to the point where rescuing his tormented soul from Hell seemed like it would kill Sam off. 

It hadn't, but even then, Lucifer wouldn't leave Sam alone; teasing him in his mind, forcing him to hallucinate until the younger Winchester gave in.

But Sam was strong and he had beaten Lucifer again, yet despite all this, Lucifer was trying to torture Sam again; to make him say 'yes' once more. 

Castiel wouldn't let that happen.

"Hey, Assbutt!"

Lucifer whirled to face them with a pleased smile as Sam lay bleeding on the floor.

"Dean!" He grinned before waving his hand dismissively at Cas. "And the... other one."

Suddenly, they were in the cage too.

"Welcome to the party," smirked Lucifer and Cas felt his stomach drop at the thought both Dean and Sam were now exposed to Lucifer's whims.

"Scared?" Mocked Lucifer and Dean glared at him.

"Not even a little."

It was a lie. Cas could feel the fear and terror pouring from Dean's soul in waves, but the seraph would protect both Winchesters until his dying breath and he narrowed his eyes at Lucifer as he dropped his blade.

"Ah-ah-ah," grinned Lucifer as he stared at Cas. "Moments like this... it's all about ambience."

He snapped his fingers in a way that reminded the trio of Gabriel, before an upbeat song rang out through all of Hell.

**~Heaven, must be missing an angel~**

Castiel lunged.

"I can beat the Darkness," hissed Lucifer as he grabbed the seraph and twisted his arm the wrong way, easily overpowering him as Dean ran to help Sam up.

As the reality of the situation finally set in and they all realised they may not get out of this fight alive, Cas ripped open his bond with Gabriel and cried for him to help them. He couldn't allow Sam and Dean to die at the hands of Lucifer.

Except, something was interfering with his bond and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't contact Gabriel.

Lucifer smirked at him.

"They're just a couple of apes," he whispered as he nodded over to Dean and Sam. "You know I'm right, Castiel; you know it!"

But Cas knew he was lying; Gabriel had already told him one archangel alone couldn't beat the Darkness. He wasn't going to fall for Lucifer's trick.

He slammed his knuckles into Lucifer's face and the archangel snarled as he dealt a heavy blow across the seraph's jaw.

As Sam stumbled to his feet and Dean got ready to attack Lucifer, Cas found himself pinned against the bars of the cage and he desperately tried to reach out to Gabe again, forcing the full power of his grace through their bond.

Lucifer winced before punching him in the stomach.

"You're just a soldier. You mean nothing to him," growled Lucifer and Castiel kicked at him. 

He may have been a soldier, but Cas without a doubt knew Gabriel's love for him. His meeting with Amara had proved that much.

Lucifer seemed furious at Cas' confidence and he used his grace to claw torturously at Cas' end of his bond with Gabriel, weakening and bruising it.

"You don't deserve him," snarled Lucifer as he smashed Cas' head against one of the bars and Castiel managed to gain enough momentum to throw him against the adjacent wall.

"Neither do you," Cas spat as he fought Lucifer's grace away, pinning him against the side of the cage.

Lucifer clawed at Cas' face before battering his fist against the seraph's chest, face a myriad of outrage and revulsion.

"He'll leave you like he left us. He's nothing but a coward."

Cas growled lowly. "You hurt him and then you betrayed him. You _slaughtered_ your own mate."

Lucifer's face twisted into a mixture of guilt and fury, before he forced Castiel to the floor as he mauled him.

"Don't pretend to know anything about our flock!" Hissed Lucifer as he dug his nails into the soft flesh of Castiel's throat.

Dean ploughed into him.

There was an intense anger in his eyes that Castiel had never seen before and he did a double-take at the sensations clogging their bond.

_Protectprotectprotect_

Sam charged into the fray, dealing a few good blows across Lucifer's body as Dean worked at his face. Castiel staggered to his feet when Lucifer threw them both off, kicking viciously at Dean's head where he fell.

Cas attacked Lucifer again with renewed vigour. 

They tussled for a few moments and Dean was quick to rise to his feet again and aid Cas, allowing the seraph to plunge his blade into any part of Lucifer he could reach. His shoulder, in this case.

The archangel screamed before wrestling the blade out of Cas hands and slashing Dean's chest with it.

Dean yelped and Cas managed to knock the blade out of the older angel's grip, his grace constricting with panic, before he was slammed into the side of the cage once more with a force that made his vision blur.

He heard a cry of agony from Dean and his eyes focused to find the older Winchester pinned to the floor as Lucifer battered his fist against his face.

Sam knocked him off balance and Dean stumbled to his feet in time to knock the newly retrieved angel blade away from Sam's stomach, but not entirely out of Lucifer's hold.

Castiel felt sick when Lucifer slashed at Sam's arm instead.

Sam grunted in pain before taking another swing at Lucifer's jaw.

Cas staggered to his feet. His mates were going to die if somebody didn't do something soon. Where were Crowley and Rowena?

As Dean was thrown to the floor, his stomach stamped on, prompting him to cry out, and Sam was choked by Lucifer's grip, the angel blade poised in his hand, Castiel realised they'd run out of time.

He wouldn't let Sam and Dean be murdered so coldly. Not by Lucifer.

He leapt at his brother, crashing his fist against his jaw and Lucifer snarled as they battled, subduing Cas after a few seconds and thrusting the blade against his throat.

"Any last words?" Lucifer growled threateningly into his ear.

"Yes," whispered Castiel as he felt the tip of the weapon bite into his skin.

Lucifer blinked. "What?"

"I said: _Yes,_ " growled Castiel quietly ensuring a battered Sam and Dean couldn't hear them from where they lay bleeding and groaning on the other side of the cage. 

They were a flock, and the members of a flock always protected one another, no matter the cost. Cas wouldn't allow his mates to suffer any further.

A twisted smirk crept slowly across Lucifer's face.

Castiel's world turned white.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh...
> 
> Liked it? Hated it? Share your thoughts! You guys have really helped me a lot with this story, just through comments!


	13. Chapter 13

The second Lucifer vanished in a blinding flash of light, Dean let out a sigh of relief. Rowena must have finished the spell.

He and Sam staggered over to a bloody Castiel, concern written all over their features when Cas didn't look at them.

"You okay?" Murmured Sam softly as he placed a supportive hand on the angel's back.

"...Yes," said Castiel hesitantly, tone a little off. Dean didn't like the sound of that; who knew what damage Lucifer had inflicted upon the seraph?

The brothers gently tugged Cas to his feet.

"C'mon, let's get you home," muttered Dean as Sam slipped his arm around Cas' waist, hand splayed protectively over his stomach.

Dean raised an eyebrow. That was... oddly intimate.

He ignored it in favour of escaping Hell.

When they reached Earth's surface, Cas carefully removed Sam's arm from his body and took a step back. Sam frowned and tried to question him through the bond, but he was surprised to find it still firmly closed. He had assumed once Lucifer vanished, the hold on his bonds would disappear too, but Castiel seemed to have sealed it shut again.

The angel must have noticed his insistent poking.

"My grace is... unsettled. I wouldn't like for either of you to be disturbed by it," he explained haltingly.

Sam didn't like the idea of Castiel being hurt grace-deep. Lucifer must have really done a number on him. He took a step forward.

"Maybe Gabriel can take a look at you? He should be able to heal you, right?"

Something flashed behind Cas' eyes for a second before the seraph shook his head slowly as Dean turned to his brother.

"Gabe's in Heaven. He's trying to get some of the other angels to bat for our team in the fight against Amara. He thinks if we all work together, we might have a shot at her."

An uncharacteristic smirk flickered unseen across Cas' face before it was gone again.

Sam tentatively reached through his bond with Gabe, relieved when the archangel's concern answered him. He'd tried so many times to use the bonds, each time without success, he almost expected his attempt to contact Gabriel would fail.

He decided to hold off explaining what had just happened, but he did inform Gabriel that Castiel might need his help.

The archangel was ready to leave in an instant but Sam told him to wait until they arrived at the Bunker.

Castiel was watching him with a strange expression.

"Fine, let's get back home and Gabriel says he can fix you up as soon as we get back," huffed Sam and Dean nodded in approval as he unlocked the Impala.

Cas hesitated. "You guys go on ahead; I'll catch up. I have... business to finish."

The brothers scowled. "In your state?" Sam asked. "Cas, you need to heal before you do anything else."

"I appreciate your concern, Sam, but there are urgent matters I need to attend to."

" _Cas,_ " protested Dean quietly, giving the angel a pleading look Sam couldn't quite decipher.

If Cas' frown was anything to go by, neither could he.

"We will speak later, but for now I must check on something," and with that, the angel vanished.

Sam and Dean glanced at each other.

"Did he seem a little... off to you?" Dean asked and Sam nodded anxiously.

Hopefully, Castiel would return soon.

 

* * *

 

_**'They already suspect.'** _

Lucifer rolled his eyes at the gravelly voice inside his head as healed his new vessel.

 _'They're too dim to catch on,'_ he replied in his own mind and it earned him a blast of irritation.

_**'You don't give humanity enough credit.'** _

_'And you give them too much, Castiel.'_ Lucifer poked sharply at Cas' grace. _'You've even tied yourself to those filthy apes.'_

His grace was shoved away by Castiel's. 

_**'Watch how you speak of my mates.'** _

Lucifer chuckled to himself as he strolled down one of the many corridors that made up Hell.

_'Except Dean's not really your mate, is he? In fact, he's not entirely sure he wants to remain bonded to you.'_

A growl. _**'That's none of your business. You weren't supposed to know of our bonds in the first place.'**_

Lucifer smirked. _'You should be careful who you go to for help, little dove. You never know who visits their dreams...'_

Cas paused. _**'...Rowena?'**_

_'Bingo. I started visiting her dreams three days before you asked her for help with severing the bonds. I was most delighted when she offered me that little titbit.'_

A bitter huff. _**'Liar. You were furious that Gabriel had found new mates; mates that truly care for him.'**_

_'Correction: I was disgusted he'd lowered himself to mating with humans. I was furious he'd tied himself to you. How could he substitute you for me? You're worthless; a simple foot soldier so warped by the rotting abyss of humanity that it has cast a terrible taint upon your grace. You're broken and pathetic and Gabriel has allowed his grace to be infected by yours. He let you mar his brightness; poison his pureness.'_

A snort. _**'You're jealous.'**_

Lucifer pursed his lips as he stopped walking.

_'Gabriel is mine. He always has been.'_

_**'Except he doesn't want you anymore. You threw him away, broke him and took everything from him until he had nothing else to give. Then, along with your brothers, you intentionally hurt him and spread lies about him because he didn't take sides. And then the bonds shattered and you cast him to the side, only to murder him eons later.** _

_**'You will never get him back and we will never make the mistakes you did. I will make sure my mate knows he is loved and wanted and you will**_ **never _touch him again. I won't allow you to hurt him again.'_**

Lucifer slammed his grace painfully into Castiel's, uncaring if the act made his own grace twitch in agony.

_'He chose the Pagans over his own mates! He left me to rot in that Cage for millennia without doing a single thing about it! Then after you clowns threw me back in there, I find that Gabriel's been alive for nearly three years without having come to see me, again! His own mate! And the icing on the cake is he offered himself to you three like some cheap hooker. Is he really that desperate for attention?'_

Cas snarled. _**'You're not his mate. You will never be his mate again. The only one who's desperate here is you. I've seen your demented thoughts, Lucifer; I know all the ways you've planned to punish Gabriel. Forced bondings, plots to drag him into the cage to be tortured by both you and Michael, public matings where all of Heaven can feel and see you humiliate him as you permanently bind yourself to him.**_

_**'You think it will repulse us? You think we'll reject him? You're wrong. He's ours and we will always stay by his side. We will always want him. Not that you'll ever get close to doing any of that. Not that we'll let you anywhere near him.'** _

_'You seem to think you have a choice,'_ snapped Lucifer. _'You seem to think you are allowed to keep him. What makes you believe you have any hopes of stopping me? Compared to me, you're nothing.'_

 _ **'Don't get comfortable,'**_ murmured Castiel. _**'I will eject you the moment Gabriel returns. You won't be able to harm the Winchesters then and you have no hopes of attacking Gabriel with three of us protecting him.'**_

Lucifer chuckled. _'By that time, I will have all of Hell on my side and your precious Winchesters won't stand a chance. However, I'm a reasonable guy. Allow me to stay in your meat suit for a little while longer and I'll spare the monkeys.'_

_**'So you can use my vessel to get to Gabriel? You must think I'm stupid.'** _

Lucifer scowled irritatedly. _'I could always force you into unconsciousness. It's not hard for an archangel to knock a simple soldier like you out and then I wouldn't have to listen to your annoying voice prattling on and on.'_

Castiel wisely kept his mouth shut. 

_'And another thing: be sure to keep the bonds closed. Even a couple of dumb humans will be able to detect me straight away if you don't and I wouldn't like to have to accidentally stab them a few times to stop them from warning my darling brother. Equally, I wouldn't like to have to burn you out if you call for Gabriel's help; after all, you could come in useful, fledgling.'_

Cas snarled. _**'Don't call me that.'**_

Lucifer grinned delightedly as he continued walking.

_'Fledgling? Is that what brother calls you when you two are getting all hot and heavy? Does he whisper it softly into your ear as he takes you? Maybe he growls it as he forces you to submit to him? Does he still scream?'_

Lucifer staggered into a wall as Castiel's grace rammed into his at full force.

 _ **'Do not mock him,'**_ the seraph seethed and Lucifer was shocked at the waves of fury and spite rolling of Castiel's grace in waves. _**'He is kind and loving and how we touch one another is none of your business! The words we trade are not yours to judge!'**_

Lucifer smirked, knowing exactly how to ruffle Castiel's feathers. 

_'They used to be. He used to be mine. It used to be my name he groaned as we merged our graces, my name he whimpered as I marked him, my name he screamed as I dominated him in_ every _sense of the word._

_'Michael and Raphael used to join in too; they'd mark him and cradle him in their wings, claim him in every way they could and he easily submitted to us; let us do whatever we pleased with him until he was nothing but a whimpering ball of bliss beneath us._

_'How does it feel to know your mate has loved three others more deeply than he loves you? How does it feel to know Gabriel has given himself more wholly to me than he ever has to you?'_

Lucifer laughed in the face of Castiel's rage. The seraph had a mighty possessive streak in him and Lucifer's words had certainly angered that side of him.

Suddenly Cas calmed himself as his grace turned cold against Lucifer's.

 _ **'And how does it feel to wonder if I have the potential of having more than all of that?'**_

Lucifer froze as Cas smirked smugly inside his mind's eye.

 _ **'You gave him up and memories are all you'll ever have. But I'm just getting started,'**_ whispered Castiel.

Lucifer knocked him out.

The he strode into the room where Crowley and Rowena stood, ready to retake his kingdom.

 

* * * 

 

When Gabriel returned to the Bunker, Cas wasn't there to greet him. 

Sam and Dean were, however, and his eyes bugged when he saw their torn-up frames, both looking as though they had been in a fight with a lawnmower and lost. 

The hunters stared at their feet like naughty school children as Gabriel exhaled deeply.

"You better have a good explanation," warned Gabriel. "Preferably one that involves some form of wild animal and _not_ a fight with my older brother." Then he glanced around for a certain blue-eyed seraph.

"I thought you said Cas was hurt?" Gabriel asked confusedly and both Winchesters shared a worried glance.

"He was," said Dean. "He refused to come back with us; said he had something to take care of first."

The archangel frowned. "That's... not like him." He took a long look at both Winchesters' bodies. "He didn't even attempt to heal you?"

Sam and Dean blinked. The thought had never crossed their minds.

"...He said his grace was out of whack," commented Dean slowly.

Gabriel scowled before placing two fingers on each of their heads, quickly ridding them of their aches, pains and open wounds.

"That's odd. He should at least have his bond to me open then, even if he wants to spare you the discomfort of a restless grace; he knows I can help soothe his grace." The archangel eyed them warily. "Dare I ask what happened down there?"

Sam shifted uncomfortably, but Dean gathered the courage to glare at Gabriel.

"Maybe I should be asking you that considering everyone but me seemed to know Sam went down there on his own?"

Gabriel grimaced. "Sorry, Dean. Sometimes I forget you don't share a bond with your brother anymore. Besides, you were a little busy with Amara."

Sam blinked and turned to his brother. "Wait, what?"

Dean ignored him. "Great. But I would still appreciate it if I could be informed when my brother decides to drop in on Hell. Especially when it's to chat with Lucifer. You know; literal Satan."

"Actually I did try to call you," mumbled Sam, "but you didn't pick up."

"A text would have been nice."

Sam raised an eyebrow. "...A text to say I was going to meet with the Devil?"

"If you had, I might not have had to watch you become Lucifer's punching bag in that cage!" Huffed Dean and Gabriel balked.

"Wait, what?!"

"He would have just dragged you in quicker," dismissed Sam. "You would have been pulled in with me when the warding failed instead of much later."

Gabriel felt his jaw hit the floor.

"Hang on, you were _both_ pulled in?!"

"Besides, Cas wouldn't have been able to find us if we'd have been pulled in at the same time, then we'd both be dead," continued Sam.

"Oh, don't tell me Castiel was pulled in with you two knuckleheads too?" Groaned Gabriel and both hunters turned to him with a frown.

"Hey," they protested in unison before Gabriel smacked his forehead against his palm.

"So what you're telling me is the three of you tried to take on an archangel in a warded cage?"

At two silent nods, Gabriel whined.

"Were you two born stupid?"

"Cas did a pretty good job," argued Dean. "And hey, none of us are dead."

"Nearly, but not quite," commented Gabriel drily. "But Cas seems to have gone AWOL."

Dean and Sam frowned thoughtfully. 

"Can't you search him out or something?" Asked Sam. "Locate his grace?"

Gabriel's eyes glazed over for a second as his expression went blank. Then he blinked and shook his head worriedly.

"No, I can't. And that bothers me. It's like he's masked, or trying to hide."

Sam paled slightly and Gabriel's gaze softened in sympathy.

"Why would he do that?" Whispered Sam and Dean raised an eyebrow as Gabriel squeezed his shoulder gently.

"We'll find him, kiddo. He can't be too far if he's injured." Gabriel's mouth twitched unhappily at the thought and he shared a look with Sam that had Dean frowning suspiciously.

Suddenly, Gabriel pulled back to stare at them both sternly.

"When we find him, we're all going to have words about you three running head-first into situations you're not prepared for."

Sam dropped his gaze as Dean crossed his arms.

"Fine. After that, we can talk about you three keeping secrets from me."

Gabriel grimaced. "Great." His head tilted to one side slightly as if he was listening carefully to something. He pulled a face.

"Heaven are requesting my presence immediately. I kind of left without finishing our discussion and now they're demanding I return." He frowned. "I don't want to leave without finding Cas."

Sam's expression softened. "You said you can't locate him with your grace anyway. We have our bonds to him; we're in the same position you are. You should go; this is important and Cas would want you to finish it. As soon as we find him, we'll call you."

Gabriel looked conflicted.

"Sam, I... You three are more important than... You're my..." He trailed off as he glanced at Dean's tight expression. Gabriel had never been good with sharing his feelings and the bonds didn't make it any easier.

It also didn't help that Dean didn't know of his little brother's involvement with the two angels.

Which was a shame because the archangel desperately wanted to tug Sam into his arms and hold him. His grace was still a little shaken from seeing him so battered, and knowing that Lucifer had caused the damage made his blood boil. 

Sam looked as though he was thinking along the same lines, but his brother's presence prevented him from closing the distance between him and his angel.

"Alright, I'll go," sighed Gabriel in defeat. "But the second you find him, you blast trumpets down our bonds, you got it?"

Sam nodded with a small smile playing about his lips.

Gabriel opened his mouth to say something more, but he remembered Dean was watching them and he snapped it shut again before raising his hand to snap.

Then he was gone.

Sam's gaze lingered a little longer on the spot the archangel had just occupied before the hairs on the back of his neck raised in the same way they did every time he got the feeling someone was looking at him.

He whirled to face a suspicious Dean.

"What?" Sam asked, although his skin crawled at the idea Dean wouldn't approve of him exploring a relationship with the angels if he found out.

"That was... strange."

Sam snorted before wandering to his room to find some new clothes. His current ones were soaked in blood and reeked of ash and death. He probably needed a shower.

"Everything about our lives is strange."

Dean pulled a face. "I meant that whole scene with you and Gabe."

Sam tried not to show his wariness. "Angels are strange. Cas is a poster child for that."

"You complained about me and Cas doing the weird eye staring contest things, but what you and Gabe just did? I can guarantee we've never had anything that intense."

Sam snorted as he shucked his shirt, before eying his brother amusedly.

"I can guarantee you have."

Dean fidgeted awkwardly in the doorway to Sam's bedroom.

"...Y'know, if there's anything you want to tell me, anything at all... I... I'll listen, okay? You're my brother and I... I just want you to be happy," Dean stammered in an uncharacteristic moment of sincerity.

Sam paused, stunned. He could tell Dean was uncertain, but he obviously didn't want Sam to feel as though he had to hide things from him.

Been there, done that. Went to Hell for it.

Sam gulped before meeting his brother's gaze.

"...Okay... Well, recently, I... uh... I became involved with... um... with two angels."

Dean averted his gaze embarrassedly. "Oh. That's... that's great. Like... for fun, or...?"

Sam swallowed thickly. "Romantically involved," he corrected and Dean nodded, cheeks bright pink.

"And... they make you... happy?" Dean asked and Sam closed his eyes, ignoring how his face felt like it was on fire.

"They make me very happy, Dean," whispered Sam. "Happier than I've been in a long time."

Dean glanced at him and saw the truth behind his words shining in his eyes. He allowed himself a tiny smile.

"Good. I don't think I'd fare very well against two angels if they ever broke your heart."

Sam beamed and Dean chuckled at his little brother's joy.

"Thank you, Dean," murmured Sam softly, gaze tender and Dean nodded back in a genuine moment of brotherly affection.

The younger Winchester hadn't expected his brother to be so easy-going about it all and it warmed his heart to think that Dean truly just wanted him to be happy, uncaring if that meant Cas and Gabe were the ones to give it to him. He had thought there would be some doubt about the sincerity of his feelings due to the accidental bonds, and Sam had prepared a whole argument around them, but Dean didn't seem to hold any judgements whatsoever.

His relief must have seeped through the bond because he received a burst of enthusiasm from Gabriel.

Dean chuckled and when Sam glanced up at him, the other man shook his head.

"I felt that too."

Sam grinned as Dean rolled his eyes.

"He's such a child. I almost feel sorry for you," snorted the older Winchester and Sam chuckled quietly.

They trailed off into a comfortable silence before Dean pushed away from the door frame.

"Well, let's get cleaned up so we can go find your mate."

 

* * *

 

"So... you and Castiel are bonded?"

"And the Winchesters make up the other half of your flock?"

"And your mating bonds with the other archangels are broken?"

Gabriel sighed. At least his siblings hadn't attacked him after learning of his relationship status. _'It's complicated'_ hadn't quite fit the bill and they had demanded an explanation during his panic at Cas' less-than-optimistic thoughts from earlier, and when he had insisted he had to make a brief house call on Earth to check on Team Free Will, they told him an explanation couldn't wait.

"Yes, yes and yes," he huffed.

There were murmurs of surprise and confusion, amongst whispers of interest and curiousness.

"But... but nobody mates like that anymore," stated Ariel, emerald eyes wide with shock. "Why would you allow yourself to be so vulnerable? What if they betray you?"

Gabriel's wings ruffled at the thought. Or they would have if he had them unleashed. "They won't."

"Lucifer, Michael and Raphael did," pointed out Ramiel. "They betrayed us all."

Gabriel scowled. "Castiel, Sam and Dean are nothing like them." 

"The Winchesters are Lucifer and Michael's true vessels. They must be like them to a certain extent."

Gabriel crossed his arms. "I can assure you they're not."

"Castiel is a traitor," scowled a dark-haired angel from the back. Zuriel, if Gabriel recalled. "He has murdered hundreds of our kind. Why would you tie yourself to a killer?"

Gabriel forced his wings to remain tucked away; that comment had irked him.

"Cas is not a murderer. He has been forced into some very difficult situations and whilst I admit that ingesting the Leviathans was not his greatest of moments; his actions after that were not truly his own."

He sighed. "Cas isn't perfect, but that's okay because neither am I. None of us are, but maybe Cas and I are less so than most. But he is the kindest and most caring angel I have ever had the pleasure of getting to know and despite everything I've done and have had done to me, Cas has promised to stand by my side for all of eternity. I couldn't have asked for anyone more loyal and understanding. He is patient where I am not, and calm when I demand action. We compliment one another in every way and somehow, the Winchesters only enhance this.

"I've never been in a relationship that has room to grow and develop and that's why my previous mating failed. We were all so sure of what we were supposed to be, so certain of our own roles in the relationship; anything different was seen as a fault. And that's why the bonds shattered. I didn't see that at the time, but I think I understand now."

At the other angels' awed expressions Gabriel chuckled.

"And that's why I'm so confident in these bonds; that's why I know I'll never be hurt by my new mates."

Sachael stared curiously at him. "But Castiel is a mere foot soldier; the Winchesters are mortals. You're an archangel. Why would you bind yourself to lesser beings?"

Gabriel frowned. "Is that what Michael and Raphael made you believe? That you are less important than us?" He shook his head at the slow nods.

"Alright, let's get one thing straight. You are of a lower rank and power, yes, but we are still brothers and sisters. You're not pawns on a chess board or numbers on a piece of paper; you are family. 

"In fact, with the way the archangels have acted these past millennia, you are better than all of us. You tried to make things right again even if sometimes you got a bit off track."

"A lot off track," muttered Ramiel and Gabriel chuckled.

"At least you tried; you did what you thought was right even if it wasn't. We, on the other hand, were self-absorbed, high-and-mighty jerks who were only out to benefit ourselves."

Sachael tilted her head. "... _You_ came back."

Gabriel paused. "Well, I suppose..."

"And you did it to make sure we were alright. That's not self-absorbed."

"Well, no, but-"

"And you have bonded to a foot soldier," interrupted Ariel. "Along with two humans. You don't think of yourself as above us like Michael, Raphael and Lucifer do." 

"...No, but-"

"You're not like we were told you'd become," said Ramiel. "You are far kinder than we were led to believe."

Gabriel was silent. He had expected them to be angry at him; to hate him and want to kill him. He wasn't prepared to be spoken highly of. Not after having abandoned them.

There was a loaded pause before Sachael lowered her gaze.

"Come back," she whispered. "Come back to Heaven and help us regain a sense of what we once were. We're lost and we need guidance. We need you, brother."

Gabriel had to physically stop his jaw from falling open. This was... unexpected.

Ramiel nodded. "Please, Gabriel. The other archangels were wrong about you; we were wrong about you. You are wise and fair. Come back to us. We'll follow you in the fight against the Darkness."

Gabriel felt his grace suddenly flare brightly, overwhelmed that his siblings wanted him back, and their resulting smiles only made his grace warm further. He dropped his gaze embarrassedly and startled when a few brave angels reached out to poke teasingly at his grace, causing it to embrace theirs.

"...I'm honoured," mumbled Gabriel, head bowed in respect and a few angels actually grinned at the display. "But Cas and I are a package deal," he continued firmly. "I can't return if he's not welcome."

There was a tense pause before Ramiel shook his head slowly.

"We understand. We don't expect you to choose us over your mate."

Ariel nodded. "Castiel will not be turned away if he chooses to accompany you."

Gabriel closed his eyes, disbelieving of how well this was all going.

"Thank you." He glanced around sincerely. "I know the past century has been chaotic and confusing for every angel, but give Cas a chance. Maybe you'll understand what I see in him."

There were a few contemplative glances before Ariel nodded.

"Maybe we will."

"However, we must urge you not to bring the Winchesters on your trips to Heaven," said Zuriel, looking rather sceptical. "There is only so much... _free will_... we can tolerate."

Gabriel laughed outright at his siblings' suddenly concerned faces.

"No problem. I think Heaven's had enough disorder already. I don't think they're too fond of this place anyway," he winked and the surrounding angels seemed to let out a collective sigh of relief.

"...So... You're going to stay this time?" Asked Sachael timidly. "And help us against the Darkness?"

Gabriel sobered. They had already received word of Ambriel's tragic fate.

"As long as you're willing to have me," he replied. "And Castiel."

"We'll inform the rest of Heaven immediately," announced Ramiel. "Our brother has returned."

Gabriel quirked a smile as young Sachael leaned forward excitedly.

"So, what's the plan?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a shorter chapter, but it needs to be in there. Hope you guys are still enjoying this fic :)


	14. Chapter 14

Castiel didn't return for four weeks.

In that time, the bonds remained firmly shut and the seraph never once made any attempt to contact Team Free Will; by phone or otherwise.

Gabriel and the Winchesters were out of their minds with worry.

And maybe a little bit of hurt.

After a week of fruitless researching, Sam and Dean had been forced to take on a hunt involving a banshee and both had been eager to restart the search for Castiel the moment it was over. With no leads, it was practically impossible, but still they tried because their friend (and mate, in Sam's case) had been damaged by Lucifer and they needed to make sure he was alright.

After two weeks, Claire Novak rang the brothers with a possible vampire case. They caught up with Jody and Alex and were impatient to restart the hunt for their missing angel the minute they returned to Kansas. They attempted to force Castiel's end of the bond open, but it wouldn't budge so they had hope that he wasn't too injured if he had such a firm hold over it.

By the third week, they began to rethink their theory of Castiel being uninjured. Sam and Dean distracted themselves with a hunt for a Qareen as it seemed futile to keep searching nearly twenty-four hours a day. 

Gabriel was frustrated with the lack of communication and Sam and Dean had given up ringing the seraph's mobile. The archangel had scoured the Earth for any traces of Castiel, but eventually had to report back to Sam and Dean that the seraph wasn't giving anything away. 

By the fourth week, the Winchesters were half convinced Cas lay dying somewhere or was already dead and that's why the bonds wouldn't open; because Castiel wasn't attached to them anymore.

Gabriel told them they were being ridiculous, but neither hunter missed the flash of fear in his eyes or the doubt in his grace. 

Then one morning, as Sam and Dean were researching a possible Hand of God to help the angels Gabriel was rallying to defeat the Darkness, Castiel finally revealed himself.

"Hello, Dean. Sam," he greeted gruffly as he appeared in the archway of the main drawing room. Sam and Dean startled, immediately reaching for their guns and blades before having to do a double-take at the stiff angel.

 _"Hello?"_ Hissed Sam angrily after a few moments of gaping. "You've been gone for a month, without as much as a single confirmation that you're still alive, and the best you can come up with is _'Hello'?_ " He mimicked the angel's voice.

Castiel frowned. "...That is still the correct term."

"We thought you were dead, Cas!" Yelled Sam, flooding their bond with anger, only to realise it was still closed, which only served to further infuriate him.

The seraph frowned. "...My apologies. I wasn't aware you felt so strongly."

Sam's jaw hit the floor. "You weren't _aware_ I felt so strongly about believing you were dead? I'm sorry; do we not share a mating bond where I only recently professed my love for you?"

Cas tilted his head. "Actually, you never said you loved me. Not explicitly."

Sam's face heated when he realised that actually, no, he had never used those words.

"Well I do," he huffed and Cas raised an eyebrow in a way that didn't suit him, before pointedly glancing at Dean.

"I already know," dismissed Dean with a snort and an eye roll.

Castiel's other eyebrow joined his first.

Sam crossed his arms. "And you'd have known that if you'd been around the past month. But you haven't, so you don't."

Cas sighed exasperatedly, which was wholly unfair considering it was the Winchesters who had been sick with concern over their missing angel, not him.

"As I said before, I had business to sort out."

"Yeah, you also said we'd 'talk later'," snorted Dean. "There's a difference between 'later' and 'a month', Cas."

The seraph scowled. "I was busy."

Sam deflated. "Too busy to check in with us? To tell us you were alive?" Sam shook his head, wounded. "We searched everywhere for you. Every minute we could. We were worried sick about you."

The puppy eyes didn't seem to be working on Cas and the angel fixed them both with a blank gaze.

"Apologies. I never meant to panic you." He didn't sound all that sorry. In fact, he sounded a little indifferent to the whole affair.

Dean scowled. "We needed you here, Cas. All of us. We didn't know what Lucifer had done to you; you should have come back with us so Gabriel could've healed you."

"I'm healed now," shrugged the angel as if it was no big deal. "There's nothing to worry about."

Dean clenched his fists. "That's not the point. We had things to discuss. Things we were going to talk about and you didn't come home."

Castiel looked confused. "What things?"

Dean floundered. "Things," he hissed, flustered. "About Amara, about..." he trailed off. How was he supposed to bring up the doubts he'd had about breaking the bonds when he and Castiel had had their chat on the side of that road? Especially when his brother was in the room; that was a bomb just waiting to blow up in everyone's faces...

Castiel looked non the wiser. "I... I'm afraid I don't understand."

Dean averted his gaze as he snapped his mouth shut. Since when was Castiel this unobservant?

Sam looked heart-broken. "We missed you, Cas. Don't you get that? You never came home," he stressed. "We wanted to know you were healthy and safe, but you didn't give us the chance." 

The younger Winchester dropped his gaze embarrassedly. "I needed you," he mumbled. "But you shut me out."

Cas hesitated. "...I told you; my grace was unsettled."

Dean snapped his gaze up. "Thought you said you were healed?"

Castiel blinked before frowning. "I am. I must've forgotten to reopen the bonds."

Sam's eyes widened incredulously. "You _forgot_ to open them?"

"Evidently," huffed the angel.

"So break the seals," snapped Dean and Cas seemed to hesitate before he narrowed his gaze.

"I'm not sure I want to."

"What?" Bit out Sam, offended. "You're kidding, right? Open the bonds, Cas. You've kept us waiting long enough."

"No," said Castiel and both Winchesters stared at him disbelievingly.

"I don't believe this," laughed Sam bitterly as Dean shook his head.

"You know what? We need to tell Gabe you've finally decided to show up."

Suddenly, Sam and Dean were thrown across the room and pinned to a wall by an invisible force.

"Sorry, boys. Can't let you do that," tutted Castiel, only his voice was a few notes higher and without the gravelly tones.

"What's going on?" Demanded Dean and Cas smiled toothily in way that was familiar to both Winchesters.

Just not on Cas.

"Can't let you contact brother dearest. We didn't exactly leave one another's company on the best of terms last time," shrugged the angel. "Besides, you're going to find me a Hand of God."

"Cas?" Dean asked, panic creeping into his tone as dread filled his systems at the suspicion of who he was actually talking to.

Castiel grinned. Or the thing wearing him did.

"Not quite."

"Lucifer," Sam whispered as he paled and the Devil smirked at them; twisting Cas' features into something impure and evil.

"Got it in one. Well... two."

Both hunters felt something constricting their throats and they scrabbled at their necks desperately as Lucifer chuckled.

"Here's what you're going to do. You're going to tell me where the Hand of God is so I have a chance at defeating Amara. Then I can pay my darling brother a visit when the Darkness is out of the way. In the meantime, you're not going to attempt to contact Gabriel through those pesky bonds, and if you do, I'll turn you inside out, got it?"

Sam choked as Dean gagged.

"Good," beamed Lucifer. "Now, where is it?"

Lucifer relinquished his grip and both Winchesters plummeted to the floor with a loud thud, gasping heavily.

"Let Cas go," wheezed Dean and Lucifer rolled his eyes before flicking his wrist, causing Dean to smash into a chair. Dean clutched his bleeding head as parts of the chair scattered around him.

"How about no?" Commented Lucifer airily before taking a step towards the fallen brothers. "The Hand of God?"

Sam attempted to reach out to Gabriel, but Lucifer was quicker and he clicked his fingers, prompting Sam to double over in agony as he started haemorrhaging internally.

"Can I just tell you Zachariah doesn't have half my imagination?" Murmured Lucifer mockingly.

A flash of movement in the corner of the archangel's vision caught his eye. Dean's left arm snapped in two places and he cried out.

"What did I just tell you about trying to call my brother?" Huffed Lucifer as he stalked towards the older Winchester. "Tell me what I need to know."

"Bite me," snarled Dean and Lucifer rolled his eyes.

"You know what? This is a waste of time. I can just take the information from you and kill you straight afterwards. Makes my life so much easier."

Both Winchesters were thrown against the wall again and they screamed in pain and torment as Lucifer pressed his palms to their foreheads, yanking the location of the fragment of the Ark of the Covenant from both brothers' minds in the most torturous and invasive way he knew how.

When he finally removed his hands, they slumped over, barely conscious. He kneeled in front of them.

"Thanks," hummed Lucifer as the pair groaned. "Any last words? No? Good."

A blade fell into his palm and he shoved Sam's back against the wall as he prepared to strike him in the chest.

Only to tumble backwards and drop the blade as he began to sweat.

"Hello, Castiel," he growled as he closed his eyes, attempting to regain control over the vessel and both Winchesters felt a spark of hope that the seraph wasn't dead.

Cas must have been fighting hard, because Lucifer was beginning to shake with exertion.

It gave Dean enough time to send an agonised cry for help to Gabriel.

Lucifer happened to glance at him at the very moment Dean closed his eyes to focus on the bonds, and the archangel hissed in fury before vanishing from the room.

A second later, Gabriel was sprinting over to the brothers, eyes wide with fear.

Upon seeing the younger Winchester gasping frantically and coughing up blood, Gabriel placed a hand over his stomach and instantly healed the haemorrhage, and Sam collapsed to the floor, curling up into a ball as he took in a shuddering breath.

Gabriel quickly moved onto Dean, ridding him of his concussion and bleeding temple, before focusing his grace on the pair more meticulously as he began to heal the less fatal damage.

"What happened?" He asked, shaken, eyes glowing dimly as Sam watched patches of gold dart behind the archangel. Gabriel must have been truly frightened if he had unleashed his wings whilst his eyes glowed golden.

"Cas showed up," coughed Sam, the odd spot of blood still escaping his lips. "Except it wasn't Cas."

Gabriel frowned in confusion as he continued to heal them and Sam didn't care that his brother was in the room; the archangel's silky grace was warm and soothing and it felt so heavenly after the torture his body and mind had just been through. He shakily pushed himself off the floor and crawled over to Gabriel, flopping into his lap as he buried his face in the archangel's shirt.

Gabriel placed a protective hand over his back.

Dean watched them almost longingly. "It was Lucifer," he whispered brokenly and Gabriel froze.

"...What?"

"Cas must have said 'yes' to Lucifer when we were in the cage." Dean shook his head as a tear rolled down his cheek. "Why would he do that?"

Gabriel was tense. "To protect you two."

Both hunters flinched at the harsh tone. Was Gabriel angry with them?

The archangel quickly latched onto their thoughts and he shook his head as he tightened his grip on Sam.

"No, I'm not. Lucifer was beating you in that cage and Cas knew you wouldn't be able to take much longer against an archangel. He sacrificed himself to keep you both alive. I'm guessing Lucifer needed a vessel?"

Sam nodded. "He couldn't escape without one," he murmured, realisation beginning to dawn on him as Gabriel scowled.

"That's why I couldn't locate Cas," he muttered. "Lucifer's grace was masking Cas'."

"But why didn't Cas open the bonds?" Asked Dean. "We could have helped him if he'd have just told us."

"Lucifer could have a hold on them," mused Gabriel. "Or maybe Cas was trying to protect us. We would have been able to detect Lucifer's presence straight away if the bonds were open; maybe he was worried Lucifer would try to harm us, like he has you, today."

"He thought we'd run in, guns blazing, without thinking it through," summarised Sam as the pain began to ebb away under Gabriel's gentle care.

"Still, a month is a long time not to say anything," huffed Dean.

Gabriel hummed in agreement. "Maybe Lucifer is restricting the connections from Cas' end then. Forcing him to keep them shut so we wouldn't know he was at the other end of them."

The archangel stroked Sam's back comfortingly and the younger hunter leaned into his touch as something like regret flickered behind Dean's eyes.

"So what do we do?" Choked out Dean, blinking away another stray tear. 

Gabriel's voice hardened. "I'm going to pay Luci a long overdue visit."

Sam sat up. "We're going with you."

"No," refused Gabriel immediately. "It's too dangerous. I'm not letting you get hurt again."

Dean glared at him. "But it's okay if _you_ do? Gabriel, we're not leaving you alone to go up against your psychotic brother. We may just be a couple of humans, but we've iced the Devil before. Let us help you, even if we just lurk in the background or something."

Gabriel shook his head. "That's not the point, Dean. I know you two are good at handling yourselves, but I don't want the fear of you getting attacked again. I can't see you on the brink of death again; every time I do, something breaks inside me."

Dean blinked at the heartfelt sincerity in the archangel's gaze. It may have been the mating bonds messing with their heads again, but Dean felt something inside him warm. He had expected a sentiment like that to be directed at Sam alone, but it hadn't been; Gabriel truly cared deeply for them both.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Dean's voice was hoarse and thick with uncomfortable emotion as he spoke.

"And what makes you think it's any different for us when we see you in pain?"

Gabriel's eyes widened a fraction as Dean continued.

"It's bad enough we can't feel or see what's happening to Cas, but just waiting around as you go off to battle your brother? You can't put us through that. That would hurt more than anything Lucifer could inflict on us. We need to be with you when you challenge Lucifer, to see that you're alright and know that we could offer at least a little bit of help if things turn sour. Waiting here would kill us."

Gabriel couldn't force any words out as Sam gently placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Members of a flock protect one another, right? Let us support you. Let us protect you if Lucifer decides to try anything."

Gabriel gulped. "He'll hurt you. He'll make you suffer and he'll torture you and I can't guarantee I'll be able to stop him in time."

Sam tugged the trembling archangel to his chest, pressing soft kisses to his hair as he flooded their bond with reassurance and soothing.

"Cas is in there too, remember? He'll be fighting hard as well. He managed to override Lucifer before; he can do it again. He won't want anything happening to any of us, not when he's gone through so much to keep us safe."

Gabriel wrapped his arms around Sam as he took a steadying breath, despite not having the actual need to breathe.

"Alright," he mumbled. "Okay, you can come."

Sam pressed a grateful kiss to his mate's head. "Thank you."

"So, what now?" Dean asked as he slowly drew his gaze from the floor, not wanting to intrude on the intimate moment between his brother and the archangel.

Gabriel's face turned grim. 

"First, we've got to find big brother."

 

* * *

 

Castiel's grace contorted in agony as Lucifer used his more powerful one to batter at it mercilessly.

 _'I could've had them,'_ hissed Lucifer in his own mind as Castiel cried out.

 _ **'You were going to kill them!'**_ Snarled Castiel.

 _'But you caught me off-guard by ramming your grace into mine,'_ growled the archangel, smirking when Cas screamed as he burnt a small hole through the seraph's grace with his much stronger one.

 _ **'Did you really expect me to stand around and watch you murder my mates?'**_ Croaked Cas. 

Another screech as Lucifer mauled the younger angel's tattered grace.

_'Mates? As if they'll want you after this. Your light is dimming, fledgling. You're broken and warped. Even humans won't want you after I'm finished with you. Not that Dean wants you anyway.'_

Cas hissed in pain. _**'They may not, but I won't let you slaughter them like animals.'**_

Another tear in the younger's grace. _'You're still holding on to hope, aren't you?'_ Laughed Lucifer mockingly. _'You truly hope they'll take you back even after I've mutilated your grace; the very essence of who you are. Do you honestly believe Gabriel, an archangel, will want anything to do with you when he sees how slashed and torn you are? How beaten you are? You're worthless, Castiel. Weak and frayed. You're not even worth the time fixing, if you can even be fixed.'_

For the first time since Lucifer had begun snapping and clawing his grace all those weeks ago, forcing him into submission so he didn't have the energy or strength to eject the archangel, Castiel felt a slither of doubt enter his mind. What if Lucifer was right? Who would want a broken angel whose grace no longer shone brightly? Gabriel could have so much better and the Winchesters had never wanted the bonds in the first place anyway. Surely they'd prefer to have fun with their one night stands than be tied to a battered angel?

Lucifer smirked. _'You know I'm right, little fledgling. You're all used up. Might as well just settle in for the ride.'_

Castiel felt the first tendrils of defeat enter his mutilated grace. He was expendable. Damaged goods.

 _'Good. You just keep a tight seal over those bonds, okay?'_ Lucifer yanked sharply at the part of his grace that was keeping the mating links closed, and Cas flinched as pain shot through his being. _'Wouldn't want Gabriel or those pesky Winchesters getting any clues to where we are. It wouldn't end well for them, would it? After all, you know what I'm capable of, fledgling.'_

Castiel had long since given up trying to stop Lucifer's use of the pet name. It was just another way of wearing the seraph down piece by piece.

 _'I think you've learned your lesson,'_ murmured Lucifer after one last tug at Cas' grace. _'For now, anyway. Let's retrieve this Hand of God and then we can pay a visit to the kids upstairs,'_ he smirked and Cas winced. Who knew what Lucifer had in store for Heaven?

_'Cheer up, little fledgling. I won't hurt them... much.'_

Cas sighed. If it was anything like how he had taken over Hell; forcing Crowley into a collar and making him clean the floor with his tongue, whilst he pretended to care about the other demons' well-beings, yet threatened them with disintegration if they so much as looked at him poorly, then Heaven was going to be in for a nasty surprise.

 _'It could always be worse,'_ hummed Lucifer airily. _'I could force you into helping me... oh, wait.'_

Cas growled bitterly. _**'Gabriel will fight alongside our brothers and sisters to strike you down. You won't even get close to taking over Heaven.'**_

 _'Who says I want to take it over?'_ Chuckled Lucifer. _'Once I use our siblings to defeat the Darkness, I'm going to take Heaven down. I have my own domain, my own Kingdom that I carved out of ash and destruction all by myself. I created my home and I'm going to take pleasure in watching you lose yours, just like you took it away from me all those eons ago.'_

 _ **'You rebelled,'**_ frowned Cas. _**'You lost it through your own mistakes.'**_

 _'So did you,'_ smirked Lucifer and Cas snapped his mouth shut. _'How are we any different?'_

 _ **'I rebelled for humans,'**_ said Cas quietly. _**'You rebelled against them.'**_

_'And we still ended up here, in this very moment. Funny how life works, isn't it?'_

There was a beat of silence before Castiel spoke again, voice barely a whisper.

_**'Don't do this, brother. Don't hurt Gabriel. I know there's still a part of you that cares for him. Please, don't humiliate him; don't cause him any more pain. He has suffered enough.'** _

Lucifer stiffened. _'You think I care about him? An old flame who left me to rot in a cell for thousands upon thousands of years, alone and afraid? I had nothing left; no one to talk to and I was thrown into a cage without so much as a goodbye. Gabriel didn't speak to me for eons and when he finally did, it was to turn against me for those Pagans,'_ he spat. _'A "hello" would have been nice, but no, I get a blade shoved in my face as he protected his masochistic girlfriend and those blasted Winchesters._

 _'He claims pain and suffering at having our bonds shattered, yet he was the only one who moved on to someone new. Multiple times,'_ murmured Lucifer bitterly. 

Cas frowned. _**'He tried to stop the fighting between you and Michael. When we were in Heaven; he tried for centuries to prevent you both from resorting to physical altercation. But you resisted. He fled because he couldn't choose one mate over the other; couldn't say he loved either of you more than the other. How is that a bad thing?'**_

 _'Because he left me!'_ Roared Lucifer, crashing his grace into Castiel's until the seraph hissed. _'And then, he chose you over me. He chose a couple of filthy hunters and a wayward youngling over his closest brother, over a fellow archangel. He didn't even try to seek me out!'_

 _ **'Because you stabbed him!'**_ Bit out Cas, still recovering from the latest burst of agony. _**'You murdered him! Why are you surprised he didn't come crawling back to you, begging you to become his mate again? You plunged your blade into his grace and then you left his vessel to rot on the floor of that hotel.'**_

Lucifer paused. _'...How do you know that? You weren't at the hotel that night.'_

Cas narrowed a glare inside Lucifer's mind. 

_**'All of Heaven felt him perish at your hands. He protected my charges even if he made some mistakes along the way. I couldn't let him remain there with so little dignity.'**_ Castiel fixed the archangel with a bitter gaze. _**'He is my brother too and although you may not remember all he did for the younglings and fledglings in Heaven, I do. I remembered it that evening as well. He deserved more than what you did to him.'**_

Lucifer was silent for a moment.

 _'What do you know?'_ He growled. _'You're just a broken, little foot soldier.'_

_**'I know he deserved better from his mates.'** _

Once again, Lucifer knocked the younger angel unconscious before preparing to board the _U.S.S. Bluefin._

He had a Hand of God to find.

 

* * *

 

Whilst Gabriel was attempting to find Lucifer, made difficult by the fact that archangels were very good at hiding when they wanted to, Dean had time to think.

Generally, as a rule, he didn't like to be left alone for long periods of time because that meant he was left to face his doubts and regrets on his own, and to be honest, he didn't like facing them at all. Some things were better left buried. A neglected childhood, for example. He couldn't change what had happened, so why think about it?

But in those minutes, he was grateful for the reprieve. After all, his future could change due to what he was about to consider.

He had made it very clear what his stance was on the mating bonds between he and the other members of Team Free Will. He had, so far, shown disgust, anger, shock, shame, humiliation, outrage and endless irritation for the unwanted links, but now he was facing something he had never expected to feel about the bonds.

Regret. 

Not regret for having formed the bonds, oh no, regret, for having rejected them.

Which was ridiculous because if he was feeling guilty for having rejected the bonds so many times, that meant he was considering keeping them despite knowing their nature. In turn this meant that he actually _wanted_ the bonds, regardless of previous protests, and therefore, by default, he wanted Castiel and Gabriel.

Which was impossible. Because Castiel and Gabriel were just friends. Brothers, maybe, but nothing more.

Besides, they were angels. Why would they ever want a mere mortal when they could have anyone and anything?

Except, they obviously cared very deeply for both hunters and Sam was clearly happily involved with them. The angels seemed quite happily involved with Sam, actually. 

Dean refused to acknowledge the spark of... something flickering low in his gut at the thought his brother was being taken care of by not just one angel, but two, because no way was he jealous or longing for that type of affection from the same two angels. 

Dean's gaze softened. _No_ , his brother deserved to be happy after all they'd been through in their miserable lives. If Gabe and Cas could give him that happiness, then who was he to argue? At least they were people he knew he could trust with his little brother, and in turn, he knew he could trust Sammy with his adopted family.

That wasn't to say he didn't wish for something similar for himself. And maybe he was selfish for thinking of it, but Gabe and Cas hadn't pushed him away, or turned their noses up at him in revulsion after everything he'd said about the bonds; all he'd accused them of in his anger. They'd had every right to punish him for the things he'd said and the way he'd acted, but they hadn't. They'd even helped him when he'd gone face-to-face with Amara as she'd tried to claim him when he'd not been able to stop her. 

They had used the bonds to comfort him and soothe him, yet they had never forced him into anything more because they recognised his aversion to the connections and respected his privacy. They had taken care of him even when he'd pushed them away, even when he'd hurt them, and now Dean wanted to return the favour.

He wasn't entirely convinced they'd want him after all the things he'd said and done and he was pretty sure no beings as pure and perfect as Cas and Gabe would ever want a human whose soul had bared the Mark of Cain, and who had embraced the role of Knight of Hell. After everything Dean had done wrong in his life, he was pretty certain he didn't deserve to be saved.

But at the same time, his heart warmed at the thought of Gabriel dropping his cocky smirk to be replaced by something a little more tender for him and his brother. Then the idea of Castiel's fond gaze and small smile would enter his mind and he couldn't stop his imagination from producing scenarios of being able to hold and touch and taste these two angels that had saved him and protected him too many times to count. 

Dean flushed. He wasn't gay. He'd never thought of two males that way before.

But then, little by little, he felt himself relax. What did it even matter anymore? After all Team Free Will had faced together and all they had been there through to support one another, what did it matter if he was suddenly attracted to men? It seemed trivial after all he had seen. 

Why was he even surprised? It wasn't as though he was attracted to the vessels (although he could appreciate that neither was bad-looking), he was in love with what was inside them; the graces that burned so brightly inside each of them.

He paused. _In love._ Had he really just thought that?

Was he really that far gone on them?

His eyes blew wide as the epiphany struck. He was in love with the two angels who called him 'flock'. He didn't know much about flocks, but he knew the term meant a great deal to his friends. 

Yet another thing he'd thrown back in their faces.

He shook his head as he staggered into a chair, his legs no longer able to support him under the weight of his realisation.

He was in love with Cas and Gabe. He wanted to give them everything and he wanted them to give him the same in return. He wanted to be their mate.

He needed them and wanted them and he'd never felt that way about anyone before. He'd never wanted someone to just be close to them, to console them when they were upset and to laugh with them when they were joyful. Other than his brother, he'd never wanted to protect and care for someone so desperately before, and to want to be taken care of was new for him too.

Lisa had been the closest he'd ever got and if those feelings had scared him back then, these feelings absolutely terrified him. Yet he had no desire to run or hide; he wanted to chase these fantasies of love and acceptance, to admit his feeling for the two angels he adored.

He had never been so afraid by the prospect of rejection. One word could shatter his heart.

Then there was the problem of Sam. His little brother had beaten him to the prize and he refused to take the angels away from him; to destroy his younger bother's newfound happiness. He didn't care what his own heart wanted; Sammy always came first and he would never begrudge his brother or be spiteful of him for it. The world was what it was.

Still, it didn't hurt any less to know that he could never have what he wanted.

It was probably for the best. He would only end up hurting everyone anyway. That's what he was best at; unintentionally hurting the ones he loved.

There was that word again.

He let it swirl in his mind a little longer; playing with the way it sounded in his head. He loved Castiel and Gabriel and he hadn't truly realised it until now. Or maybe he had, but he had been too afraid or stubborn to admit it to himself. 

He didn't know whether to be embarrassed or ashamed.

However, the angels could never want him, not like they obviously wanted Sam. Dean was too worn down, too unclean by all his time in Hell and Purgatory. 

And then there was the bond to Amara. That was a can of worms he didn't want to touch with a ten-foot barge pole.

How could he contemplate desiring affection from two angels, when said angels knew of his link to Amara; a soul bond tying them together in dark and powerful ways for all of eternity? The notion was laughable. 

It would have been nice to be wanted though.

"Dean!" Called Sam's voice breathlessly as he banged on the door to his bedroom, presumably after having sprinted through the hallway.

"Yeah?" Dean grunted, snapping out of his solemn musings. There was a pause as Sam tried to catch his breath.

"Gabe's found him."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look, more Cas/Lucifer snark :) Comments and improvements greatly appreciated.


	15. Chapter 15

Castiel screamed out his anguish when Jophiel exploded at Lucifer's hands. Another one of his brothers who had met an unnecessary demise. Worse was that Jophiel had been able to see Castiel's grace swirling around Jimmy's vessel, where it was being forced into submission by Lucifer's powerful one. 

Lucifer merely told him to _'shut up'_ as he continued on his way to HQ.

It was easy to see that the other angels were terrified of the archangel. They cowered as Lucifer spoke, graces unsettled and wary as they too, had felt Jophiel's untimely death. 

Lucifer seemed to take pleasure in their fear, embraced it even, and he used intimidation tactics to scare them into following him.

Then Ramiel called him 'Evil' and Cas recoiled at the fury and hurt emanating off Lucifer. 

The other angels seemed to notice it too, because they shrunk away, afraid to inflict Lucifer's wrath upon themselves, but Ramiel stood his ground, hiding his terror well. He refused to back down to Lucifer and Cas had a feeling Gabriel had succeeded in getting Heaven to accept his intentions.

Lucifer lied and deceived his way around the topic, but Cas could feel the upset in his grace at having being cast out of Heaven; the archangel truly believed he didn't deserve his punishment and he was bitter about it. It made Castiel hesitate.

However, when Lucifer spoke of locking Amara away, the youngest angel in the room, Sachael, if Castiel remembered correctly, scowled and slowly shook her head.

"You're lying," she murmured, flinching as Lucifer's sharp gaze focused on her. "We already know one archangel alone can't defeat the Darkness."

Castiel was surprised to realise his siblings were protecting Gabriel; not mentioning his name to defend him from Lucifer's punishment. It warmed his grace to see his brothers and sisters looking out for one another again.

Unfortunately, Lucifer already knew of his brother's preaching. He stalked towards Sachael menacingly, eyes narrowed and grin forced.

"Or maybe it's just Gabriel who can't defeat her on his own? Hm? That is who you've been conferring with, isn't it? The brother who left us all for Pagan sacrifices and black magic? The brother who abandoned us to play dress-up with Norse gods, Greek gods and every other false deity under the sun? That Gabriel? Or does he go by the name 'Loki' now?"

Lucifer towered over Sachael and the younger angel gulped as she took a step backwards. Lucifer took another forwards.

"He has made his case," stated Ramiel calmly as Lucifer's calculating gaze snapped to him. "He has explained his mistakes and apologised for them. We believe his intentions to be true... unlike yours."

In under a second, Lucifer was in front of Ramiel.

"You think I'm lying, brother? I'm offended you think so little of me. Once upon a time, you younglings treated me with respect, looked up to me with stars in your eyes." Suddenly Lucifer's expression morphed into one of sadness and regret.

Cas knew it was all an act.

"Then again, you used to gaze upon one another with love and affection, yet look at the mess you've all caused. Angels against angels, factions against factions, brothers against sisters... and I didn't even play a hand in that. Raphael's dead, so you can't blame him. Michael's still in the Cage and Gabriel only resurfaced recently so they can't be held accountable either..."

He grinned toothily. "Looks like that one's all your own doing. All this death and war; that's on you." He waggled his finger accusingly at the surrounding angels, who looked away in shame.

Ariel however, opened her mouth, presumably to point out that actually, Michael was the one who first built the armies to fight against the rogue angels Lucifer had tempted, and Raphael spilt the divisions even further by trying to kill Castiel, but Lucifer shook his head.

"The problem with you people is you never take any responsibility for your own actions. You look for someone to blame and so you don't have to admit your own mistakes, you find the most vulnerable being you can to punish."

"Like you, brother?"

The surrounding lower angels seemed to suddenly brighten with hope as their eyes widened at the new arrivals.

Lucifer froze and slowly turned to face the guests with an enraged scowl, only to be met with a thunderous expression and two furious but slightly frightened ones in return.

Castiel's grace rejoiced warmly.

"Gabriel," greeted Lucifer coldly and the younger archangel narrowed his eyes.

"Let Castiel go."

Like a switch had been flipped, Lucifer's face morphed into an expression of amusement and his eyes sparkled with glee as he leaned on the table and crossed his arms.

"I'd rather not if that's alright with you. I've grown used to him being my annoying little Jiminy Cricket." He grinned. "He's also a great punching bag."

Gabriel's blade fell into his palm.

"Don't make this hard, Lucifer. Let Castiel go and leave this place. You have no right to taunt our brothers and sisters."

Lucifer raised an eyebrow. "Wait a minute. Before, you said you only wanted me to release Cas, now you want me to leave Heaven? That escalated quickly."

Gabriel growled and it was such a foreign sound to be heard from the usually playful archangel, Sam and Dean actually startled.

"Release my mate, Lucifer."

The older archangel scowled and a few younger angels backed away slightly at the rage and spite rolling off Lucifer in waves.

" _'Mate'?_ " He hissed, fists clenching until his knuckles turned white. "You dare call this pitiful, broken, tainted abomination your _mate?_ " Lucifer took a step forwards and Gabriel tugged Sam and Dean behind him.

"The only abomination here is you," snarled Dean and Lucifer quickly lifted his hand and made a complicated gesture, possibly to crush Dean's windpipe or break his neck or something equally garish, but nothing came of it.

Lucifer scowled at feeling Gabriel's energy protecting the two humans.

"You're not taking more of my family from me," stated Gabriel and Lucifer looked furious. "Now give me back my mate."

Lucifer slammed his hand against the table, making the other angels jump and scuttle backwards, unwilling to be caught in the crossfire between two archangels.

"He's just a foot soldier! He means nothing to anybody! He is nothing! Why did you soil yourself with his grace?" Hissed Lucifer. "Why did you tie yourself to such a pathetic waste of space?"

Gabriel snarled.

"He means something to me. He means everything to me. And I didn't _'soil myself'_ by bonding to him; his grace made mine so much better. He saved me. He fixed my broken parts and made my grace shine again."

"He's worthless!"

"He loves me!" Yelled Gabriel, unleashing his wings in fury and both Sam and Dean saw flashes of gold behind the archangel. "And I love him. He's loyal and trustworthy, intelligent and calm, generous and caring... and he was there for me when I needed him. He protects me yet looks up to me." 

Gabriel glared at Lucifer. "It's more than I can say for you. It's more than any of the archangels had together."

Cas froze. Did Gabriel really think so highly of him? Even though he could see the damage Lucifer had inflicted upon his grace? Did Gabriel still want him despite all that?

Lucifer heard his thoughts but remained quiet.

"How dare you," seethed Lucifer. "How dare you compare the mere threads linking you to those apes and this cannon fodder to the connections we all shared! They were sacred, beautiful links that bound us as a flock and you've made a mockery of them!"

"He's not cannon fodder!" Roared Gabriel before gesturing to the surrounding angels. "None of them are! They're our brothers and sisters; our family, and you treat them like dirt under you feet!"

A few younger angels perked up at Gabriel defending of them, looking upon the youngest archangel with respect as he clenched his fists.

"That's the problem with you, Lucifer. You think you deserve to be worshipped just for existing. But the Universe doesn't work like that; you need to _earn_ respect. Look out for the little guys. That's where we all went wrong at first; we thought of ourselves above everyone else when we aren't. Is it any wonder the archangels are hated by all of Heaven when we acted as though our problems were greater than theirs?"

Gabriel shook his head regretfully, wings drooping. 

"We fought constantly without reprieve. They were afraid, brother. We did nothing to soothe them, to reassure them. They were so young and they didn't understand what was happening, and we just left them to wonder. They could feel our anger for one another, our pain and sadness and they couldn't do anything about it; they didn't even know why we felt that way. And we did _nothing._ "

Lucifer stiffened as Gabriel glanced at him, hurt and shame mixed in with the anger. A few angels' graces dimmed in distress.

"End this, brother. Please. End the fighting between us. What is the point in it all? We've lost so many brothers and sisters; Raphael is _dead_ because of this. Michael's gone insane in the Cage. Why are we fighting? What will it gain us? We've lost everything." Gabriel's voice was wrecked, choked with grief and Castiel desperately wanted to open the bonds and soothe him, comfort him when he so obviously needed it.

Even a few surrounding angels had tear tracks wetting their cheeks as they bowed their heads in sadness.

Sam and Dean gingerly opened their bonds to Gabriel, bathing his grace in sympathy and comfort. Sam even allowed his soul to cradle the archangel's devastated grace. Gabriel was grateful.

Lucifer was silent for a few moments, contemplating the broken words before a hurt scowl made its way onto his face.

"You left me," he accused quietly. "You left me to rot in that Cage. You let Michael throw me out of Heaven and neither you nor Raphael did anything to stop him. My own mates cast me aside; left me to suffer because of one mistake. Why should I end this? Why should I forgive you? I lost my home, my family, my grace, everything; all in one moment! You chose to leave! What did you lose? Bonds you obviously didn't care about? Family you no longer wanted? A home you wanted to leave anyway?"

Gabriel slumped. "You're wrong. Heaven wasn't my home... _You were._ You, Michael and Raphael. It didn't matter where we were, as long as we were together, that was where my home was. I lost my home long before I fled Heaven. The moment you started fighting, that's when I lost you. That's when I lost my home."

A stray tear rolled down Gabriel's cheek and he brushed it away.

"It's also when we lost them," he murmured as he gestured to the surrounding angels. "We destroyed everything in a single moment, but we were too prideful to try to fix it. Instead, we made it worse and that's why the bonds shattered; because we didn't attempt to mend anything."

Lucifer stood frozen as Gabriel gazed at him sorrowfully. Castiel could feel the older archangel's distraught grace beginning to crack and break as the spite and hatred melted away into anguish and shame. It shocked Castiel into action.

 _ **'Release me and go to him,'**_ he pleaded in Lucifer's mind. _**'Make amends and maybe you can be brothers again. You're both hurting, so fix it. Reach out, brother.'**_

Lucifer's hand twitched and Castiel was excited to find the archangel carefully considering his words, his grace fidgeting, torn.

Then Lucifer's grace accidentally brushed the part of Castiel's that was keeping a tight seal over the bonds, and the seraph's heart sunk.

"Yet you moved on pretty quickly," muttered Lucifer coldly as contempt began to blossom in his grace once more, replacing the shame.

Gabriel's face fell. "Luci..."

"No," bit out Lucifer. Then he forced Castiel to open the bonds in a twist that took the seraph off-guard and Gabriel's eyes widened at finally being able to feel his mate.

Suddenly, Lucifer tore at Castiel's already battered grace, mauling it and torturing it until the younger angel screamed in agony. 

Gabriel doubled over as Sam and Dean collapsed at the pain flooding their bonds. 

"Stop!" Begged Gabriel as he tried to shield Cas' grace with his own, curling around it as Lucifer continued his onslaught. Before Gabriel could embrace it totally, Lucifer burnt another hole through the seraph's tattered grace and Cas cried out.

Then Gabriel noticed how frayed Cas' ends of the bonds were, where Lucifer had pulled and clawed at them until they were weak and frail, and when Gabriel had shoved his own grace down one to protect Cas, the end had become swollen and even more inflamed.

As Sam and Dean groaned behind him, making a desperate attempt to help Gabriel shield Cas' grace with their souls, despite the pain they were feeling, and Castiel's grace trembled with torment, Gabriel saw red.

Lucifer had hurt his mates. Nobody was allowed to hurt his mates.

He climbed to his feet and Lucifer snarled at the bright golden glow of his eyes as his wings hitched high in outrage.

"I'll give you one more chance, Lucifer. Let my mate go, or I'll force you."

Lucifer smirked bitterly. "He's not your mate, Gabriel. None of them are. They were just an easy rebound because you're so desperate for attention."

Gabriel let his grace loose on Lucifer's.

He closed the bonds so the rest of Team Free Will wouldn't feel it, but he didn't hold back as he let his agony and rejection and anguish crash into the other archangel. 

Lucifer gasped, bronze wings tarnished by Hell's blackness ripping from their hidden position in a mixture of shock and pain.

"You think I didn't care?" Seethed Gabriel, traces of his true voice causing Sam and Dean to cover their ears. "You think I didn't adore you?"

Lucifer clutched at his chest as he doubled over. 

"You were everything to me!" Roared Gabriel. "When you and Michael started truly fighting, and I mean when you started to tear at each other with your blades and wings and graces, this is how I felt! You hid it from our brothers and sisters at first, but you didn't hide it from me or Raphael. You even managed to drag us both into it all."

Another great explosion of hurt and despair and Lucifer cried out.

"We were happy!" Yelled Gabriel, beginning to shake with exertion and emotion. "We were a flock! And you and Michael destroyed it together!"

Suddenly, the sensations intensified by nearly triple and Lucifer screamed. 

"When our bonds shattered I knew we'd lost everything! I even considered terminating my own grace; did you know that? But I didn't and I tried to start again."

Lucifer suddenly felt a burning in his grace, unbearable heat making him sweat.

"And then you torched that too!" Hissed Gabriel, eyes bright as his great wings spanned wide with unrepentant rage. "And you slaughtered me anyway!"

Lucifer grated his teeth together, wings shaking in torture at all the emotions Gabriel was overwhelming him with.

"So yeah, when by some miracle I crawled my way back into existence, of course I didn't seek you out! I found amnesty where I made friends who actually took care of me and yes, I accidentally bonded to them, but it didn't matter because we trusted one another. But then two of them took the next step and I was honoured to be wanted by them; to be loved by these two as their mate- "

"Three," interrupted Dean and Gabriel blinked, stunned as Dean gulped. "Three," he repeated quietly before averting his gaze.

Sam and Castiel's brains had crashed.

Gabriel nodded stiffly before turning back to the downed archangel who was looking between them all with pained disgust.

"...To be loved by these _three_ as their mate," amended Gabriel in a choked voice. Then it hardened. "And after all that, you find a way to take it from me again."

Another blast of despair at finding Castiel had been possessed by the other archangel.

Lucifer groaned.

"Why are you so intent on destroying my life?" Snarled Gabriel as he advanced on his brother. "Why are you so determined to cause me as much misery and suffering as possible? Was it not enough to take my grace and break it? Did you have to do it twice more before you'd be satisfied?"

"You already condemned me to a life of unhappiness and torment in a box in the darkest recesses of Hell," whispered Lucifer. "Why should you be allowed to have another chance at pleasure when I can never have one?"

"You are not the mate I once loved," murmured Gabriel heart-brokenly as his grace receded from Lucifer's.

"And neither are you," muttered Lucifer as the pain ebbed away.

Gabriel closed his eyes in defeat. He'd hoped he could get through to the damaged archangel, but it seemed that Lucifer was too warped by years of distrust and spite to be reasoned with.

"I was going to claim you, you know," grated out Lucifer. "Right here. I was going to humiliate you and show you who you truly belonged to. And then I was going to take you to the Cage and let Michael have his way with you. Discipline you for leaving us. He's not as far gone as everyone thinks..."

Gabriel stiffened as Dean readied his angel blade and Sam cut his hand to get ready to draw the warding that would temporarily banish Lucifer.

"But you're not worth it anymore. You're not the angel you used to be. You've allowed yourself to be mutilated and twisted by humanity. I wouldn't like my grace to be marred by yours." A hint of regret flashed behind Lucifer's eyes and Gabriel paused, confused.

"But it doesn't stop me from killing the one that helped cause your taint."

Gabriel's bond with Castiel was set alight once again with agony and Gabriel's eyes glowed nearly white with intensity as his wings splayed wide, ready to be used as weapons.

Absolutely livid, Gabriel lunged at his brother.

Both vessels collapsed to the floor as gold and dull bronze energy collided with one another and tussled violently, before flying through a window.

The surrounding angels looked shaken, terrified as they stared at one another and back to the fallen bodies lying un-movingly on the ground.

Sam and Dean were standing stock-still, uncertain of what had just happened, when the vessel of Jimmy Novak began to twitch and groan.

They sprinted towards it.

 _"...briel?"_ Cas asked groggily as he clutched at his head and both Winchesters kneeled by his side.

"Cas?" Dean asked, torn between panic for Gabriel and relief that Cas was still alive. "You okay?"

Cas gave him a half-hearted glare before glancing around, unfocused.

"...Where Gabr'l? He with Luc'fer?"

"We think so. They just... crashed together and then their vessels fell and this... light came out of them," murmured Sam. "Was that their graces?"

Cas paused as he collected himself and this time, his words weren't as slurred and he didn't seem as disorientated. In fact, he seemed concerned.

"No. It was an energy form of their true selves. Gabriel didn't want to hurt me during his fight with our brother so he found a different way to attack Lucifer. It also released me from Lucifer's hold."

"Wait, so Gabriel's out there fighting Lucifer on his own?" Dean asked, eyes wide and panicked.

Cas shook his head as he stumbled to his feet.

"No," he said determinedly.

Then the vessel once again slumped to the floor as Cas' being shot through the window.

Sam and Dean stared at one another in horror. Cas and Gabe had closed their bonds to both humans meaning the only way they would know if anything had gone wrong would be if the bonds shattered.

They prayed they would never have to feel that, but Castiel was weak from Lucifer's constant torture and Gabriel had already been killed by his brother once.

All they could do was wait to see if their angels returned.

The remaining angels glanced at between the Winchesters and one another, uncomfortable and uncertain as to what would happen when the victor of the battle emerged. If Gabriel or Castiel triumphed, Heaven would have a chance of returning to its former glory, and its angels may be able to relearn their original reasons for existing; their initial functions in the Universe. 

If Lucifer defeated them, well...

The outcome didn't bear thinking about.

After three Earthly hours, Sam and Dean were beside themselves with anxiety and apprehension. They paced the floor, prodding at the bonds desperately every thirty seconds, just to see if they could gain any indication of what was occurring outside, where they couldn't help their friends. If they had wings, the feathers would be falling out with worry as they twitched erratically.

The surrounding angels watched them silently, tilting their heads at the way the humans' souls were pulsing and swirling and fidgeting with nerves, worrying for their mates. The young angels had never witnessed bonded mates before, so seeing these humans so concerned for angels was fascinating, especially when their souls were reacting so frantically.

Suddenly, there were two weak coughs, breathless and pained, and the brothers whirled around sharply only for their hearts to sink in horror as bile rose up their throats.

They sprinted towards the bruised and bloodied forms of Castiel and Gabriel, who were now residing in their vessels and were attempting to sit up from where their bodies had fallen.

Dean ran to a torn-up Castiel as Sam slid in beside a battered Gabriel and as both angels trembled with the intensity of their many injuries, the Winchesters pulled them to their chests, offering them physical support as well as emotional.

The bonds remained firmly closed, to both Winchesters' dismay.

Castiel coughed chestily, blood slipping past his lips and spattering the floor as he closed his eyes, body shuddering as Dean tugged him closer. The older Winchester's pulse raced when he registered Castiel's unusually icy skin. 

Castiel was very badly hurt.

Gabriel whimpered quietly as he pressed into Sam, seeking safety and reassurance and Sam wrapped his arms around him, ignoring the blood seeping into his own clothes and smearing over his skin from the archangel's beaten body. He pressed his lips to his ear as he mumbled soothing words into it.

Dean looked stricken as he turned a pleading gaze to the other angels in the room.

"Help them, please," he begged as he held Castiel close when the seraph began to cough up blood again, frame wracked with tremors.

He felt like sobbing when one angel shook his head slowly, sadly.

"There's nothing we can do. We can't heal an archangel's grace; they're too different, too powerful. And Castiel... his grace is frail and weak; we can't... I'm not sure he can be saved. The healing energy required would take too long to transfer and he's... he's fading too quickly." The angel's expression softened. "I'm sorry, but his light is dimming, and I'm not certain Gabriel will survive the death of his mate, not when his grace is already under so much stress from his wounds."

Sam and Dean glanced at the other angels with fear and heartbreak, before the older Winchester narrowed his gaze.

"Well do something!" He hissed, but hot tears were sliding over his cheeks, anguish shining bright in his eyes. "Don't let them die like this!"

The angel, whose name was Zuriel but the Winchesters neither knew nor cared, opened his mouth to apologise once more, before tilting his head contemplatively.

At receiving no response, both Winchesters tugged their angels tighter as they tried to apply pressure to the most garish of the wounds, despite most of the fatal injuries being grace-deep.

As blood seeped between their fingers, Sam and Dean bit back sobs of hopelessness as they watched their mates, and potential mates' lives drain away in their arms.

"I have heard rumours of bonded mates being able to heal and communicate with one another in unique and powerful ways. Although due to its rarity, I'm not certain as to the accuracy of these rumours and as you are human, I'm not sure this would prove true for you," mused Zuriel thoughtfully and the Winchesters' heads snapped up.

Sam stared at the dark skinned angel for a few seconds before Gabriel curled into him with a groan.

"Zap us home," demanded Sam. "Lebanon, Kansas." 

Zuriel nodded and Sachael quickly joined him, each angel pressing two fingers to a Winchester's temple.

"Bring them back to us," whispered Sachael, sapphire eyes boring into Dean in a way that reminded Dean of another certain blue-eyed angel.

When Dean blinked, he was staring at the Bunker's front door, with Sam beside him. They glanced determinedly at one another before carrying each angel, bridal style, into their home.

They carefully placed each angel on Sam's bed (merely because it was closest) and poked gingerly at the bonds, silently begging for the angels to open them.

"C'mon, guys. Open up. You're hurting and we want to help," murmured Sam softly as he brushed a thumb over Gabriel's cheek. The archangel whined pathetically as he huddled in on himself.

"Don' wan' to hurt you," he muttered as he leaned into Sam's gentle hand.

"You've got to let us help," pleaded Dean, voice choked. "Please, open the bonds and let us heal you. Let us try."

Cas shook his head, groaning with the effort and Gabriel paused at hearing the seraph in pain.

Dean blinked back tears as he placed a hand over Cas' arm.

"Please. Don't make us watch you die. We need you. Don't put us through that; don't put yourselves through that agony."

Cas focused on Dean's comforting touch before easing the bonds open.

Both Winchesters hissed at the torture their mate was facing before their souls were racing to soothe the broken and cracking grace, to fill the holes and take some of the torment and stress away. 

"Open up, Gabe," insisted Sam, and hesitantly, the archangel undid the seals keeping the humans out.

After another pained shock, the Winchesters helped to heal Gabriel too. It was agony for all four, but if it had the potential to save the angels' lives, Sam and Dean didn't care; their family was their greatest priority.

The hunters released an exhausted sigh of relief after two hours of intense attention to the bonds and the angels' graces. Cas and Gabe didn't look as though they were on the brink of death anymore and their graces were no longer under the same torture and duress that they had been when they had first arrived.

Leaving Sam to ensure the angels weren't suddenly going to crash, Dean left the room to find a bowl of warm water, a cloth and some clean bed sheets.

When he returned, Sam was carding his fingers through Gabriel's newly unleashed wings, battered and bloodied as they were.

The pair were conversing quietly as Sam plucked a few broken feathers from Gabriel's torn wing; one of the largest ones and Dean found himself wondering what the magnificent appendages looked and felt like when they were whole and properly cared for. He shook his head to clear the thought from his mind; now was not the time.

Sam glanced up at his arrival and upon noticing the single bowl, he stood from the bedside, but not before pressing a tender kiss to the archangel's temple, which Gabriel immediately leaned into.

"I'll get a second bowl," he said before striding through the doorway.

Dean had the strange feeling his little brother had planned this somehow. 

He glanced at the unconscious figure of Castiel, still alive, but not having enough energy for any higher brain functions.

He shuffled around the bed, kneeling beside Gabriel as he dunked the cloth in the warm water. The archangel watched him wordlessly as he wrung the cloth out.

Dean hesitated as he took in the amount of dried and fresh blood caking Gabriel's body. Deciding to suck up his awkwardness at the intimate affair, Dean pressed the cloth to the angel's cheek.

He was surprised when Gabriel closed his eyes, lips parting slightly in relief as he relaxed into Dean's touch.

Dean gulped and resisted the urge to ghost his lips over the archangel's. Care first, confessions later.

"I won't bite," chuckled Gabriel weakly and Dean realised he'd frozen, hand still poised on Gabriel's cheek. Swallowing his doubts, Dean uncoiled his clenched fingers and cupped the archangel's cheek tenderly through the cloth as he continued to remove the blood from Gabriel's face.

Gabriel quirked a small smile and turned slightly to lean into Dean's hand. The older Winchester couldn't help the amused smirk as he continued to wipe the archangel's face until it looked more presentable. He slowly moved onto the archangel's neck, idly wondering how long it took to find a second bowl and cloth, and Gabriel hummed in appreciation as his soul embraced the archangel's grace once more.

"When we're not worrying about certain people bleeding out over the bed sheets, we need to discuss what you said earlier in Heaven," murmured Gabriel quietly and Dean's movements faltered. Gabriel cracked an eye open and stared at Dean's anxious expression before gently brushing his grace against the hunter's soul.

_Reassuranceaffectionlovewant_

Dean released a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding. 

"I can guarantee Castiel feels the same way," whispered Gabriel as he reached out to his brother's lightly twitching grace to soothe it.

Gabriel's eyes were warm and loving as his honey gaze focused on Dean's face and the hunter had to avert his gaze to stop himself from doing something that wasn't appropriate at that point.

"Heal first, chick-flick later," he grunted as he rinsed the cloth, scrunching his nose up at the amount of blood darkening the water.

"I'll hold you to that," murmured Gabriel as he closed his eyes again and settled into the pillows, allowing Dean to work.

Conveniently, that was the moment Sam chose to return. 

He kneeled beside the sleeping angel and began to clean the blood from his frame, refusing to meet Dean's unimpressed gaze.

"Subtle," huffed Dean under his breath and Sam's lip twitched in amusement as he ducked his head lower, as if he was concentrating on a particularly ground-in patch of blood.

Gabriel snorted quietly and Dean couldn't help his own resulting smile.

Maybe they were going to be alright, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a heart-to-heart next. We have some important discussions to come...
> 
> Hope you've enjoyed the ride so far!


	16. Chapter 16

Two days later saw the Winchesters watching over the sleeping angels. The celestial beings were still greatly injured; their graces weak and dimmed, but they were no longer bleeding out and they could stay conscious for longer periods of time. 

Castiel was by far the worse of the pair, considering he had been tormented by Lucifer for a month, so his grace was severely damaged and his emotional state wasn't too great either from the constant taunting. 

Gabriel was more physically injured. His wings were torn to shreds, making them painful to move and his grace looked as though someone had taken a lawn mower to it.

However, due to the Winchesters' non-stop attention and care, the angels had been able to slowly heal where they wouldn't have had none of them been mated. Sam and Dean had never been more appreciative of the bonds.

Sam turned a page in his latest Terry Pratchett novel as Dean continued to clean one of his guns. He wasn't really interested in the weapon, it just gave him an excuse to occupy his hands whilst he sneaked concerned glances over at the pair of angels currently knocked out on the bed.

"Do you love them?" Asked Sam suddenly, not once taking his eyes off his book and Dean startled before turning warily to his brother. Sam looked relaxed.

"...I don't think this is the right-"

"Simple question, Dean. Do you love them? Yes or no?"

The older Winchester hesitated.

"...Yes," he murmured softly, almost embarrassedly and Sam quirked a grin, taking Dean by surprise.

"Good," the younger Winchester stated as he closed his book and placed it beside his chair. "Give me a heads up when you want to tell them and I'll make sure to give you some privacy."

Dean's eyebrows rocketed skywards.

"It doesn't bother you?"

Sam shook his head. "No, why would it?"

Dean snapped his mouth shut. His brother was treating all this as if it was a normal situation for people to find themselves in.

"You have no problem at all with me liking your... partners?"

"Mates," Sam corrected smoothly. "And nope. No problem at all. Besides, they like you too."

Dean felt his eyes trying to pop out of his skull.

"You're perfectly okay with me wanting Cas and Gabe when you've already got them?"

Sam grinned wickedly. "Not only am I fine with it, I'm actually encouraging you to confess your feelings to them."

Dean's brain rebooted. "Why?" He managed after a few moments.

His brother's gaze softened. "Because Gabe keeps talking about family and flocks and Cas has cared for you for years, and I want them to have something they want for a change. It's time someone showed them some affection and although I give them as much as I can, I want them to have more. They need all the love they can get after everything they've done and suffered and I know you'd give everything you have to them."

Sam paused and Dean had the feeling he was contemplating whether or not he should actually say the next part of his little speech. 

"...And you deserve to be happy," Sam offered quietly. "You've always looked after everyone but yourself, even when we were kids, and it's time you had something nice for a change. If Cas and Gabe are the ones that can give it to you, then what right do I have to stop any of it?

"You're my brother, Dean. I just want to see you enjoying life for once and not worrying about what's lurking in the shadows twenty-four-seven. Let someone take care of you."

Dean glanced away as he swiped at a droplet of water beneath his lashes. The roof must be leaking because there was no way he was crying at hearing his brother's sappy words. He was a surly hunter; those kinds of people didn't cry at confessions of love or brotherly affection.

"Thanks, Sam," muttered Dean and his brother smiled warmly.

"No problem. We'll make this work; I know we will."

Dean snorted quietly. "You realise how weird this is gonna get? How are we both going to be with the same two angels?"

Sam shrugged dismissively as if it didn't worry him at all.

"It'll work. We'll make it work, just like we always do. It won't be as strange as you think."

Dean shook his head. "What happened to the apple pie life, with a white picket fence and two-point-five kids?"

Sam chuckled. "You've got to admit, this is much more interesting." He glanced at the angels. "I think it'll suit us better."

As his gaze flitted over to the two peacefully resting beings he'd come to love, Dean couldn't help but agree.

"If it's any consolation, I can make you apple pies?" Came Gabriel's amused voice and Dean blinked before his face flushed.

"Please tell me you've only just woken up," he groaned and Gabriel flicked his gaze over to him and winked, a cheeky grin lighting his face.

"I believe you're supposed to wake me up with true love's kiss."

Sam chuckled as his brother's face heated even more and the taller hunter climbed to his feet.

"I'll give the Prince and Princesses some privacy," he snorted before bowing extravagantly in a way that made Gabriel laugh and Dean roll his eyes. Then he vanished through the doorway.

Gabriel's playful smirk morphed into something more fond as his attention snapped back to Dean.

Dean shuffled his feet awkwardly. "Is Cas okay?" He settled on and Gabriel cocked an eyebrow.

"You should know," he murmured as he poked teasingly at their bond.

Dean glanced at his feet. "I'm just stalling," he admitted and Gabriel chuckled.

"I know."

There was a beat of silence before Gabriel's voice cut through it once more.

"I'm still waiting for that kiss."

Dean's gaze snapped up in surprise, but Gabriel's head was tilted and a small smile was playing about his lips as his eyes glinted with teasing and maybe a little bit of anxiousness.

Dean didn't even remember telling his feet to move, but before he knew it, he had crossed the distance between them and was kneeling beside the bed as his hand cupped the archangel's cheek.

Gabriel closed his eyes at the contact and Dean quickly leaned in and pressed their lips together, sweet and gentle so as not to aggravate Gabriel's wounds any further. 

The archangel slumped and Dean moved to support him a little better before Gabriel sighed into his mouth with relief. Dean briefly felt guilty for having made the archangel wait for so long when he so obviously needed contact, but he still couldn't help but marvel that Gabriel desired him at all after all the times he had screwed up.

Gabriel pulled away slightly with a frown as he leaned his forehead against Dean's.

"I wish you wouldn't think like that," he whispered, and Dean grimaced when he realised the bonds were wide open and he was projecting his musings.

"You're not a screw-up, Dean. Sure, you've made a few mistakes; we all have. But given all that has been expected of you throughout your life, I'd say you turned out pretty good," said Gabriel, though there was a hint of guilt in his tone, shame even and Dean was reminded of the Mystery Spot case and all the other times Gabriel had tried to get him and Sam to say 'yes' to Lucifer and Michael.

Dean scowled as the archangel winced. Gabriel had obviously picked up on where his thoughts lay, so he captured the angel's lips again. 

"That was a long time ago. You know we've all forgiven you for it. You've made up for it a lot since then," murmured Dean and Gabriel carefully tangled his fingers in Dean's hair as he deepened their kiss.

"If I'm not allowed to dwell on the past, then neither are you," hummed Gabriel, nipping playfully at Dean's bottom lip. "We leave our mistakes behind us, where they belong."

"Everything I've done though... going to Hell, becoming a demon-"

Gabriel nipped at his jaw in reprimand, making Dean gasp in a mixture of surprise and interest.

"Ah-ah. What did I just say?" Huffed Gabriel as he focused on Dean's lips again.

"...But the things I said about you... about the bonds... I'm so-"

Gabriel shoved his tongue in Dean's mouth to shut him up and was rewarded with a quiet moan as he mapped the hunter's mouth and tongue out, memorising the details for later.

"I _know_ you're sorry," whispered Gabriel when they pulled apart (mainly because Dean had to breathe). "I can feel you, remember?" A warm burst of love flooded their bond and Dean's eyes widened.

"...Is that true?" Asked Dean hoarsely. "Do you... do you love me?"

Gabriel chuckled as he began to pepper kisses over the hunter's face.

"Yup."

Dean gulped and remained frozen where he was until Gabriel had no choice but to pull away with a frown.

"Is... is that okay?" Gabriel asked, suddenly unsure. Had he pushed too far, too fast? Had he misread Dean's intentions?

The hunter blinked and opened his mouth to say something before shutting it again.

"I always thought we clashed personalities a lot..." he settled on. "I'm having a hard time believing..." He trailed off, uncertain how to finish that sentence without sounding particularly unintelligent or like someone out of an 80's romantic drama.

"A hard time believing I could want more than a quick roll in the hay with you?" Grinned Gabriel, suddenly understanding Dean's thought process.

The hunter chuckled sheepishly. "I sound like a teenager."

Gabriel looked delighted. "Not at all," he murmured before diving in for another kiss and this time, Dean shifted into a better position to hold Gabriel, so the archangel wasn't putting stress on his wounds.

Dean lapped inside the angel's mouth, surprised by how quickly he was becoming addicted to the sweet taste of the Trickster-archangel. There was something about him that reminded Dean of cherries and chocolate.

He thought it would feel weird to kiss another male, but he realised that he was barely even aware that's what he was doing. He was more interested in giving Gabriel what he wanted and making sure the archangel was comfortable and felt needed. He was also acutely aware that Gabriel was doing the same for him; tangling his fingers in his hair as he wrapped his other arm around Dean's middle in order to get closer and give everything he had to the human.

Dean had never felt so honoured with the amount of trust Gabe was offering him. 

Wanting the archangel to know he was just as desired and trusted, Dean decided to be brave and reached out to run a gentle hand over one of Gabriel's tattered wings.

The archangel whined softly as the wing arched upwards, desperate for more soothing contact and Dean toned the pace down a little as he nuzzled at Gabriel's jaw and continued to stroke the battered wing.

Gabriel let his head fall back onto the pillows with a whimper.

Dean smoothed his hand over a few good feathers, unsure where to touch without hurting Gabriel (he and Sam may have washed off the blood, but the wounds still looked awful and would continue to do so until Gabriel's grace was restored).

"Just keep petting them," pleaded Gabriel through a groan. "Your hands feel so good."

Dean smiled as he carded his fingers through a few wayward feathers, shifting them back into order so they didn't irritate Gabriel quite as much. The archangel's eyelids fluttered shut as his breathing began to calm as some of his pain faded.

"When I'm a little better, I'll teach you how to groom," promised Gabriel and Dean grinned. That sounded interesting. 

He couldn't help but lean down and capture Gabriel's lips again as the archangel relaxed beneath him. Gabriel mouthed at his lips eagerly, groaning and gasping quietly every so often as Dean touched his wings.

"That's a sight I could grow accustomed to," came a gravelly voice beside them and the pair turned their heads to find Castiel blinking up at them sleepily.

He tilted his head at Dean.

"I take it you want to keep the bonds?"

Dean grinned as his cheeks heated and he nodded embarrassedly.

"Yeah, Cas. I want to keep the bonds. If you'll have me, that is?"

Castiel rolled his eyes before leaning forwards and stealing a chaste kiss.

"Don't ask stupid questions," he grumbled and Gabriel snorted as Dean's expression flitted between imitating a tomato and a gasping fish.

Then Cas frowned petulantly as he addressed his brother. 

"You've had your turn," he said and Gabriel outright laughed as he glanced back at the shocked Dean.

"I think that's your cue, kiddo," he smirked as he gestured to the younger angel.

Dean's eyes widened before he scrambled around the other side of the bed and he was surprised when Castiel made a great effort to unleash his wings in a way Dean would be able to see them.

They weren't as broken and beaten as Gabriel's were, but they were clearly in distress from his weak grace. Some feathers were falling out whilst others were bent at odd angles or were stuck together until they couldn't be differentiated between.

As he gazed at the mutilated forms of the two angels, something inside Dean's heart clenched in upset and anger. These were his _mates_. These two angels lying broken and in pain were his mates and they were there because they'd tried to protect both him and Sam, and one another. 

He scowled. This would never happen again. They were a family... no... they were a _flock_ now. And members of a flock always protected their mates; he would never allow them to be hurt again. He would never reject or push them away again.

He was caught off-guard by Castiel's lips crashing into his. 

Beside them, Gabriel was frozen, wide-eyed as he stared at them, shock written all over his features.

"Flock?" Gabriel whispered, shaken, when the pair pulled apart and Dean realised Castiel was also staring at him as though he'd pulled the stars from the sky for him. 

It struck him how much that single word actually meant to angels.

Dean gulped as he swallowed down his fear and apprehension, and tenderly cupped Castiel's cheek as he leaned in for a proper kiss.

As their lips connected, he realised he'd never felt so at home.

Castiel made this choked sound of pleasure as Dean carded his fingers through the chaotic feathers, shifting them back into a more comfortable position as they continued to taste each other's mouths unhurriedly.

When they finally pulled apart, Castiel looking as though he was about to start purring at Dean's comforting touch, the hunter nodded firmly.

"Yeah. We're a flock. You're my mates and I love you."

He hadn't planned on adding the last sentence in there, but as Castiel and Gabriel each let out a little, broken sob, he knew he'd made the right decision.

Musing how he'd already come this far, might as well make it a full romantic drama, the hunter moved to the foot of the bed and crawled between both angels before gently tugging them into his sides.

Immediately, Gabriel buried his face into Dean's neck, sobbing silently into his skin as the hunter wrapped his arm more securely around him.

A few cool tears rolled down Cas' cheeks, but Dean kissed them away and soon, Cas was smiling joyfully as he kissed Dean breathless.

After a few moments, Cas moved to nuzzle at Dean's jaw and the older Winchester pressed his lips to Gabriel's hair as he felt his neck grow damp.

"I love you," murmured Dean in between kisses to the archangel's head, knowing that was what Gabriel needed to hear, and as he placed another kiss to his hair, he murmured the phrase again and again until Gabriel curled into him desperately.

Castiel watched with a small smile before resting his head on Dean's chest and letting the hunter continue to stroke his scruffy wings. 

Gabriel's wings were trembling, overwhelmed with emotion at Dean's confession after having lost his previous flock so horrendously, and the archangel couldn't help the tears leaking onto the human's neck when he realised Sam, Dean and Cas had given him a second chance at being truly happy. 

After everything they'd each been through to get here, they were willing to overlook their past differences and mistakes, and the fact that two of them were human and related by blood, in order to come together as a single flock, as a family who cared for one another.

Dean smoothed a hand over an aching area in his wing, warming it and soothing it before tucking the archangel's head under his chin. Castiel shifted until his arms were around Dean and his unruly wings were draped over Gabriel, shielding him and his golden wings from any more harm.

Gabriel whimpered appreciatively and Dean's chuckle vibrated through his chest and into the archangel, warming him to his core.

He snuggled further into Dean and manoeuvred Cas' wing into the position he wanted before closing his eyes again, content for the first time in a very long while.

Castiel and Dean shared a sweet kiss before the seraph pressed his face into the hunter's neck and his breathing began to even out.

"Sleep," murmured Dean quietly as he curled his arm more securely around Gabriel and splayed his hand protectively between the bases of Cas' wings.

He nuzzled Cas' fluffy raven hair with a tiny smile.

"I'll watch over you."

 

* * *

 

A week later saw Cas and Gabe up and about the bunker. The majority of their wounds had healed (although some of the more major injuries could still be seen) and their graces were slowly brightening the more Sam and Dean used their souls to strengthen them. As a result, the bonds they all shared had blossomed quicker than any of them could have predicted and there was now no chance of them being severed by an outside force.

Not that the thought had even crossed their minds.

Gabriel groaned pornographically (more out of habit than an actual need to be dramatic) as his wings fanned wide, giving Dean's calloused hands more access.

Cas and Sam rolled their eyes in unison, before returning to their discussion about Roman versus Greek mythology as Sam buried his hands in the younger angel's wings.

If either angel had wanted to, they could have sheathed their wings again without strain on their graces, but they had chosen to leave them in a physical form for now.

Mostly because they rather liked it when the Winchesters plunged their fingers between their feathers at any moment of the day.

They still had to sleep because although their graces were healing, they were in no way even close to their original power, and the stress and emotional trauma over the past month or so caught them at times and drained their graces to the point of exhaustion. 

Not that anyone was complaining. 

At first, Sam and Dean had taken turns allowing the angels to cuddle up to them as they slept (angels were very tactile creatures), but when Cas and Gabe started being able to walk around for short amounts of time, the group had spilt off into pairs, alternating partners each night.

It wasn't as weird as it had first sounded.

At one point, Gabriel had jokingly stated they should be part of a swingers club, but Cas' growl put a halt to that line of teasing. The seraph didn't like the thought of sharing his mates with anyone else.

Dean had been shocked by Castiel's possessive streak, always assuming it was Gabriel who didn't like to share, but actually, the archangel was easy going about pretty much everything and it was Cas who liked to stake his claim.

Suddenly the handprint and all the carvings on his and his brother's ribs made sense.

Not that Dean minded.

Gabriel snickered. "When we've healed a bit more, you'll see just how possessive Cas can get."

That made certain parts of Dean's body twitch with interest and because Gabe was the biggest tease there was on the face of this planet and every other planet, he leaned backwards and _accidentally_ rolled his hips over Dean's lap as he shifted into a more comfortable position.

"Don't start something you can't finish," murmured Dean in a hushed voice so Sam wouldn't pull a face again at their flirting.

A sparkle of mischief graced the archangel's eyes before he arched into Dean, wings stretching wide as he let out a loud moan.

" _Oh, Dean!_ You're so _big..._ "

"Gross, Gabe!" Protested Sam as the archangel cackled.

"He's only jealous," winked Dean as he slid his arms around Gabriel's stomach and placed a sloppy, wet kiss to the archangel's cheek, for once not caring how he acted. This was his family; he could be himself around them. He could have a little fun.

Sam scrunched up his nose and gagged as Gabriel grabbed Dean's face with both hands and made a show of kissing the older hunter as noisily as possible.

Castiel gave them a brief, unimpressed glance before focusing his attention on the TV providing a background noise of _Dr. Sexy MD._

Eventually, grooming recommenced and Dean chuckled at the way his touch was really affecting Gabriel's wings. Although the archangel had made a point of groaning exaggeratedly earlier, he was obviously enjoying the petting because the great appendages were shaking minutely with bliss.

Dean tightened his grip on Gabriel's middle and the archangel let out a little mewl of delight as he pressed into Dean, in search of more contact as Dean manipulated one of the smallest wings, running his fingers through it and massaging the flesh underneath as he shifted feathers back into place. 

Gabriel buried his face into Dean's neck as the human continued to play with the wing, rubbing at tense muscles and old kinks that needed tending to. He plucked out a few feathers that were broken or causing discomfort, before brushing a finger over that wing's oil gland, making Gabe stiffen.

With a smirk, Dean grazed a finger over the gland again, then again, and he soon began to rub it torturous slowly until the oil surfaced.

Gabriel released a shaky breath against Dean's neck, quiet and intimate and Dean pressed his lips against his cheek.

"Feels so good," whispered Gabriel and Dean nuzzled his jaw.

"Can't wait for you to heal," he muttered. "Want to touch you everywhere. Want to make you feel everything."

"Looking forward to it," smiled Gabriel almost silently as he stole a kiss.

Despite all the ridiculous flirting, the humans had refrained from exploring their angels any more intimately than a gentle grooming or a passionate kiss as they had no intentions of rushing anything, or hurting the angels any more than they already were.

Besides, the teasing was kind of fun and made the end result that much sweeter.

Gabriel relaxed into Dean, cuddling into him, pleased, as the hunter began to massage the oil into his wings. Gabriel tucked his head under Dean's chin and pressed his wing further into the curious hand, smirking when Dean started to pepper soft kisses over his head as his free arm tugged the archangel closer.

"I could get used to this," hummed Gabriel quietly as he glanced at Sam and Castiel, who had returned to their previous conversation and looked happier than they had done in a long time. There was something about the way Sam's arm curled protectively around Cas' middle as the other hand worked at a black wing, whilst Cas leaned into Sam's chest that made them seem warm and content.

Dean was struck with a welcome feeling of _home_ and _family_.

He sneaked a glance at Gabriel, who was watching the pair with a small smile and Dean could feel a grin threatening to take over his own lips, so he pressed them against Gabriel's head instead as he splayed his hand possessively over the archangel's stomach.

"Good, 'cause it looks like you'll have to," murmured Dean and Gabriel paused before his face lit up and he beamed at the hunter.

Dean liked that expression.

He kissed it to see if it would grow any brighter. It did.

Gabriel threw his arms around Dean, settling against his chest as the older Winchester pushed his hand deep between the feathers of his secondary wing, oil moisturising the abused flesh beneath them.

"You don't know how much that means to me, kid," whispered Gabriel and Dean was surprised at the fuzzy feelings in his gut at the pet name. He didn't usually like people making him out to be young and inexperienced, but the way Gabriel said it made him want to curl up in the archangel's wings and never leave. 

He nuzzled Gabe's cheek.

"Trust me, I do," he replied as he allowed a tendril of his soul to trail through the bond and brush Gabriel's grace comfortingly.

The archangel closed his eyes and latched onto the tendril, gently embracing it and pulsing love and gratitude into it, to which Dean responded in kind.

After a few moments of tender affection, Dean frowned slightly, and Gabriel's grace pulsed lightly in curiousness.

"...Gabe? What went on between you and Lucifer? Last week... what actually happened?"

Castiel froze in Sam's lap, wings tense and for a moment, Gabriel went rigid as well, but a gentle stroke to his wing grounded him back in reality and Cas hesitantly relaxed a second later.

"He hurt you three, we fought, Cas joined in, he said some things, we said some things and then he fled," sighed Gabriel, wings twitching slightly in distress. 

Dean spread his palm over one as he caressed Gabriel's grace through their bond.

"You make it sound as though he didn't almost kill you both," commented Dean drily and Cas shifted uncomfortably.

"Lucifer was intent on hurting Gabriel through me. He didn't want to kill him, but when he saw how willing Gabriel was to defend me despite their previous relationship, I think he grew... upset."

"You mean he was jealous and wanted you both to hurt as much as he did?" Snorted Sam and Cas nodded hesitantly.

"...Lucifer has suffered for a very long time. He believes he made a single mistake and has paid penance for it ever since. He has been isolated from his brethren for millennia and has mourned the loss of his bonds and his mates' love and I think he truly believed there was a chance, however minuscule, that one day he could regain some of what he'd lost.

"However, when he heard of our mating to Gabriel and then saw the truth for himself, I think it broke him to an extent. I think he realised how far he'd fallen and how much he'd changed and he was angry and bitter and upset. He wanted to make someone pay for all he'd lost when he believed it wasn't merely his fault alone, and I just so happened to be one of the problems preventing him from having his old mate again."

Gabriel scowled. "Yeah, except he didn't count on the depth of our link. When he heard we had accidentally bonded, he assumed I wouldn't care for Cas as much as I had cared for him and Michael and Raphael back in the day." The archangel glanced at Cas. "He was wrong."

The seraph offered him a grateful smile before Gabriel shrugged.

"Not that I'd give you guys up for anything. You're mine now and I'm not letting you get away."

Sam grinned fondly as Castiel closed his eyes and relaxed back into the younger Winchester's thorough grooming. Dean held Gabriel a little tighter.

"Must've been some fight," muttered Dean. "You both looked like you'd been through a cheese grater."

Gabriel shook his head. "It was. Last time there was a fight between two archangels, humans called it the apocalypse." Gabriel paused. "Oh, wait, I think you were there..."

Dean shoved his shoulder as their brothers rolled their eyes.

"And that was before they truly started fighting. You can imagine how intense it gets when one of those archangels is trying to protect their mates, especially when one of those mates joins the battle," continued Gabriel before glancing sternly at Cas.

Surprisingly, the seraph narrowed his eyes defiantly.

"And was I supposed to just leave you to be slaughtered? You are my mate just as much as I am yours; it's my job to protect you too, however powerful you or your opponent may be."

Gabriel huffed, but his wings had just fluffed up in joy.

"You are one stubborn fledgling," he grumbled, but he was secretly flattered. His previous mates had never felt the need to protect him so fiercely; just expecting that his status as archangel would allow him to defend himself against most creatures, if not all. It was nice to be looked after and shown that he was cared about, especially when Cas was much less powerful than him and Lucifer, yet had fought for him anyway.

"We're a flock," grunted Castiel as if this explained everything and Gabriel's wings fluffed up even further, making Cas smirk.

Dean poked at one of the fluffy wings curiously.

"It means he's overly joyful," supplied Cas helpfully and Gabriel squawked in embarrassment as Sam and Dean chuckled. "They do the same thing when in their natural ethereal state."

"O, all-mighty Archangel of Fluff..." murmured Dean, just to watch Gabriel's face redden as he tried to bury it in the hunter's neck.

Dean snickered as he held the archangel, cradling him close as he combed his fingers through a wing and Gabriel would never admit to sighing happily at the feeling of safety.

There were a few moments of quiet as Sam and Dean lavished their mates with attention before the younger Winchester's expression morphed into one of concern.

"...Is it true... what you said? Did you really think about killing yourself?" Asked Sam softly, cautiously and Gabriel pretended not to notice the way Dean's grip tightened protectively around his stomach as Castiel stiffened.

"Yes," he said simply. "I'd lost my family, my flock, my home... everything. I didn't see the point in living any more. But through some sort of dogged determination, I changed my mind and I carried on and made a new life. I'm not proud of some of the things I've done, but I got here in the end, I suppose."

Dean huffed as he placed a possessive kiss to the archangel's neck. 

"And we're all grateful for it."

Gabriel's lip twitched in an amused yet honoured smile as Sam and Cas shoved agreement through the bonds.

 _'You're ours,'_ whispered Dean through his bond with Gabriel and immediately the archangel flooded his soul with want and need and an overwhelming amount of love.

"So am I," chuckled Gabriel aloud as he relaxed into Dean's chest, and he didn't miss the way Sam's arms wound further around Cas' stomach as the hunter nuzzled the seraph's neck. Gabriel was pleased that his little brother was finally getting the care and attention he deserved after all he'd faced.

"So, Lucifer just... fled?" Dean asked curiously, snapping Gabriel out of his musings and the archangel nodded slowly.

"He realised he was outnumbered, so he ran."

Castiel frowned. "That's not exactly true."

Gabriel glanced at him and there was a hint of sadness in his eyes. Castiel furrowed his brow; he didn't like it when any of his mates were upset.

"My time with Lucifer was... enlightening," the seraph began. "Like I said, he doesn't believe he deserves all he has suffered through." His gaze focused on Gabriel.

"He truly thought he could win you back. He thought you were looking for something to fill the holes the shattering of your old bonds had created and he believed your mating to us had altered from an accident to a cheap means of relief. 

"The longer I was inside his mind, or he was in mine; it was rather unclear, the more he realised how deep our connection actually was. He was furious at first, then it turned into contempt as he began to maul my ends of the bonds and my grace. 

"But I think despite his hatred of me and his anger at you for 'replacing him', there was a part of him that still held hope for being able to win you back, even if it meant bullying you or forcing you. When he saw your willingness to fight for us in Heaven, I think he realised he'd lost you completely. I know he spoke of your grace being marred and tainted, but I think he was trying to convince himself that he didn't need you, that he didn't want you."

Castiel scowled contemplatively before glancing at the stunned Gabriel with almost regretful eyes.

"I think he still loved you, brother. Despite everything that has happened between you both and the other archangels, I think some part of him still loved and needed you. To see you with a new flock... I believe it broke him. During all these millennia, there was always a tiny slither of possibility that you would return to him, but seeing you with us squashed that hope he's been holding on to for eons. You chose us over him and he knew for certain he had lost you forever."

Cas shook his head. "He didn't flee because of any advantage we had over him in a fight... he fled because there was nothing left for him to fight for."

Gabriel was sitting frozen and wide-eyed in Dean's lap, and both Winchesters gulped and shared a nervous glance. They'd only just got their angels; only just found a spark of happiness and this new information could be enough to make Gabriel leave for his big brother.

Not that they'd ever stop him. Loving someone meant letting them go even if it broke their hearts in the process, and Gabriel and Lucifer had a grand, old history together in Heaven. Even Castiel couldn't compete and Gabriel was bound to still hold a glimmer of affection for the other archangel even after everything they'd put each other through. 

If Gabriel thought his brother needed comfort and still loved him, would the Trickster want to return to that part of his old life? Would he want an ex-mate he had loved and cherished for eons over a couple of humans and a young seraph he had only been mated to for a few months, and even that had been an accident? 

After learning of Lucifer's thoughts and feelings, would Gabriel want him back?

Even Castiel had his gaze lowered as if he expected the answer to be 'yes' as the archangel mulled this new information over.

Dean's arms slowly slid away from Gabriel's stomach as Sam bit his lip.

"We won't hold you back, Gabe. Do whatever you feel is best for you."

Dean felt his heart crack and Cas' shoulders slumped defeatedly.

Gabriel however, looked bewildered.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, looking slightly panicked as he glanced at his friends' dejected faces. "What's going on?"

Cas frowned confusedly. "We would've thought you wanted to reevaluate our partnership. After all, you and Lucifer did share an intense and ineffably deep connection. To hear he still has feelings for you..." Castiel trailed off quietly.

Gabriel's eyes were like basketballs. "Are you-?" He shook his head before laughing almost hysterically. 

"You're kidding, right?" He asked as the others stared at him blankly. "After everything we've done to get to this point, after all the hunts and the arguing and facing Amara and being beaten up by Lucifer and then being possessed by Lucifer, you think I'm just going to... leave? You think I'm just going to give you three up like that?"

Gabriel's expression grew tight. "And for Lucifer, too?" He shook his head firmly as the others glanced at one another in surprise. 

"I wouldn't care if I was still bonded to him, he hurt me and then he hurt you just because he could. He tortured and taunted you just for fun and for a way of getting what he wanted, and you think I'm going to give my flock up for that?"

Gabriel's anger faded, replaced by weariness and exhaustion.

" _You_ are my mates now. You mean everything to me," he said softly. "I will never leave you. Even if there is another archangel who still loves me, who I shared a connection with that lasted for hundreds of millennia." Gabriel's wings drooped.

"I love you. You give me hope and you make me feel wanted. You care for me and protect me in a way my old mates never did. I've never experienced anything like this before and trust me, I'm old. I've experienced a lot. But this... what I feel when I'm around you... it's like my grace just belongs with you. And I know it's not perfect, but that's what's so amazing about these bonds. 

"I had perfect. Michael, Lucifer and Raphael were perfect; heck, we were literally _created_ for one another... yet, look what happened. The Universe changed but we didn't and we paid the price. What I have with you though... there's room to give and adapt and it's new for me. 

"I never thought I'd have a second chance at happiness; at - forgive me for sounding sappy - a second chance at love. But you guys... you gave it to me. We all had to work for it, but we got there in the end and it's stronger than anything I ever shared with my previous mates."

Gabriel's wings pinned to his back as his face fell.

"Why would I ever give that up?"

The archangel's eyes widened as all three bonds opened up in unison and were flooded with nothing but pure, intense love. He collapsed into Dean's chest and closed his eyes as he tried to return the sentiment, but the onslaught was too overwhelming and it swamped his grace and drowned it with emotion, and as the last trails of it faded away, Gabriel realised he was shaking, tears prickling at his eyes as his wings fluffed out further than they ever had before, in ethereal or physical state.

He was acutely aware of Dean's arms snaking around him as the hunter pressed devoted kisses to the back of his neck and shoulders, and he let out a shuddering breath.

"Once again, why would I ever give you up?"

The grins he received melted his grace and his wings began to flutter to Castiel's amusement. Sam and Dean eyed them curiously.

"I don't think I've ever seen you so happy, brother," murmured Castiel quietly, fondly and the archangel huffed out a weak laugh.

"That's because I never had you three."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I promised you there would be lots of fluff, didn't I? Hope you're still enjoying this; one chapter to go! (And it's more of an epilogue, really)


	17. Chapter 17

Two months came and passed and Team Free Will had never been closer nor stronger.

The threat of Amara was still hanging over their heads, and they all knew that Lucifer was somewhere doing... _something..._ they just didn't know where or what. So far he hadn't made too much of a nuisance of himself since fleeing his battle against Cas and Gabe, but the Devil was always up to something; always scheming and plotting, so the members of Team Free Will didn't hold their breaths.

Dean however, was quite happy where he was at that moment.

Sam and Gabe were off doing who-knows-what in a different part of the bunker (or maybe in a pocket dimension; it was difficult to guess with Gabriel), but Dean had never felt more at ease.

They had all been researching that afternoon; something about a 'Soul eater' that had been lurking for decades in a certain house, but now it was late evening and Dean's eyes were beginning to tire from the constant reading.

Castiel was scrutinising the newspaper they'd first heard about the strange comas from and as the seraph's wings twitched in deep thought (neither angel had got around to hiding them again... not in the Bunker anyway), Dean realised there was no chance of him being able to return his focus to the investigation.

His gaze settled upon the angel, Cas too immersed in his reading to notice, and he couldn't help but smile at the tiny crease in the seraph's brow that meant he was concentrating, or the downward tilt to his mouth that indicated he wasn't happy with a particular line of text.

Dean took a brief moment to just take in Castiel. How many times had this angel saved his life and his brother's? How many times had this angel defied orders for them? How many times had Castiel sacrificed himself for them?

And now the sentiment was extending to Gabriel. This stunning angel that didn't get the recognition and thanks he deserved had taken all of them into his heart and given them everything he had and more. 

Dean knew he and his brother had been under-appreciative of Cas in the past; he knew they'd taken him for granted, yet the seraph had stuck with them through thick and thin, selflessly aiding them and gaining nothing in return. Even his own kind had shunned him (although Gabriel was slowly beginning to change that).

It wasn't fair; Castiel had been through so much suffering and given everything in the name of what he believed (and usually was) right and where had it got the seraph?

Hunted by Heaven and possessed by Lucifer. Great rewards.

Dean was determined to change that. Cas deserved everything and Dean would do his best to give him exactly that. 

Silently, Dean stood from his chair and made his way to where the seraph was standing, hunched over the table in a way that would make any spinal practitioner grind their teeth together. 

Dean slipped his arms around Cas' waist, still somewhat amazed that he was allowed to do that, and the seraph startled before straightening and taking a minute to relax into Dean's hold.

"We should be trying to solve this case," said Cas gravely after a moment and Dean held him a little tighter.

"We've been researching all day. Just... relax for a sec. Enjoy this while we can; while we don't have to worry about the Darkness, or Lucifer, or Hell, or Heaven or anything else that has a habit of ruining people's lives. Just let me hold you?"

Cas paused. "Okay, Dean," he murmured, but he sounded content as he leaned into the hunter's chest.

Dean pressed his lips against Cas' shoulder; nothing erotic, just a way of convincing himself that the angel was really there, that this wasn't all some beautiful dream where he would wake up to a still-dead Gabriel and an injured Cas that was barely an angel anymore.

"This is real," mumbled Cas softly, eyes closed. "I'm here." He sent a gentle pulse of reassurance through their bond. "Gabe's alive and you and Sam are safe."

Dean wasn't entirely sure if Cas said that to convince the hunter or himself. He pressed another kiss to the angel's neck.

Cas abruptly whirled in Dean's arms and captured his lips, warm and tender and maybe a little desperate, so Dean cupped Cas' cheek and deepened their kiss, not afraid to show his need and affection for the angel.

Cas melted against him as they tasted one another. The seraph was like forests and oceans, with a hint of something sweet and Dean couldn't get enough of it as he lapped inside Cas' mouth. This angel was his; they could do this whenever they wanted; could touch one another whenever they felt like it.

The thought made Dean pull back in wonder as he gazed at Cas and the seraph grumbled out disapproval as he chased Dean's lips blindly.

Dean humoured him and let Cas claim his mouth again.

Cas' wings arced around them both, sealing them off from the rest of the world, and Dean fisted his hand in one, tugging the feathers desperately and making Cas growl and pull their bodies flush with one another.

Passion in bed was not something Dean had initially associated with this particular angel. Nor had he expected Cas to be so possessive or vocal during sex, but this... this wasn't any of that.

There was a need in both of them, not a sexual desire, but just a need to be close to one another and to understand that this was actually happening. After all they had been through together, the rocky start and all the arguments, the lies and the deceit, to the sacrifice and friendship, the care and affection, the slow progression to _'family'_... this was really happening right now. They could both touch and kiss and love one another as much as they needed and feel their emotions reciprocated. 

Dean came to the startling revelation that maybe he'd loved Cas long before the bonds had first been forged.

He pulled away with wide eyes when the thought hit him and when he saw a similar expression glinting behind Castiel's eyes, only far more accepted by the angel's own mind, Dean crushed their lips together again, apology and regret and promise all rolled into one as they nipped and licked and teased at each other's mouths.

A couple of minutes later, they pulled apart again, though their bodies remained tightly pressed together and their lips were swollen and invitingly pink. Dean couldn't help but steal another kiss.

He gently brushed his knuckled down Cas' cheek in awe.

"I can't believe this is happening," he blurted and Cas quirked a smile before leaning their foreheads together.

"I mean, I'm definitely glad that it is and I'm happy I get to touch you and kiss you, but I never thought this would happen, and I never thought I'd feel this way about anyone, much less an angel and my best friend and-"

Cas cut Dean's babbling off with a tender kiss.

"I'm so lucky to have you," whispered Dean when they broke apart. 

"I feel like I should be saying that to you," hummed Cas as he nuzzled Dean's neck.

The hunter tangled a hand in his hair. "I know I don't deserve you, but I promise I'll give you everything I have. You're beautiful and amazing and you deserve to be treated like it for once."

Cas placed his lips against the human's jaw.

"You deserve happiness too, Dean." It felt so easy to run his fingers up Dean's spine and around the back of his neck, touching anywhere he could get his hands on. Cas had never expected to be allowed anything like this. Not with any human nor his own kind. For his closest friends and family to want him like this...

Dean stroked a thumb over Cas' cheek as he claimed his mouth.

"Tell me what you need, Cas," he whispered hoarsely. "Tell me what you want and I'll give it to you."

"You," murmured Castiel against his hunter's lips without missing a beat. "Just you. Let me keep touching you."

Dean pressed closer, sliding his tongue against the angel's.

"My room," he ordered quietly as he pulled back, grip tightening at Cas' soft rumble of protest. 

The seraph immediately complied, dragging Dean with him, and they pawed at one another's bodies, capturing each other's lips every so often and stumbling when they became too engrossed in one another to mind where they were going.

When they finally made it the short distance to Dean's room, Cas was too impatient to lock the door, so he made a flicking motion with his hand as his mouth was still connected to Dean's and the lock clicked into place.

Dean hummed appreciatively, before pushing the angel onto the bed and straddling him. He was determined to make Cas feel needed and loved tonight. Because he was, and so much more.

When he pushed Cas' head back on the pillows, the seraph dragged Dean down with him, unwilling to lose contact with his mouth and the pair shifted until they were as close as they could physically get to one another without Dean actually collapsing on Cas. Not that Cas would get crushed; he was an angel, after all.

The seraph fisted his hand in Dean's hair as the other wrapped around his back, and the hand that wasn't holding Dean above the angel wandered into one of the huge black wings splayed out to him in offering.

The wing arched and spread out further, encouraging Dean to explore it and whilst mapping Castiel's mouth out with his tongue felt amazing, tonight was about his angel and Dean was determined to give him as much pleasure as he could.

He pulled away from the seraph's mouth, ignoring Cas' huff of disappointment, before roughly digging his fingers deep between his feathers and scraping his nails lightly over the flesh of the wing.

Cas' lips parted and his eyes fluttered closed and Dean took a few seconds to just watch the expression; to muse how much he could make this beautiful creature groan and whimper by touch alone. 

He knew he couldn't do for Cas half as much as what the angel did for him, but he could give him this; he could make Cas not feel quite as lonely any more and he could convey his appreciation and gratefulness and love for the angel through every little kiss, every gentle touch to his body. 

He could make Cas feel worth something again.

He wasn't stupid, he'd felt the bonds turn sour sometimes with Cas' dark musings of how he'd fallen from grace so many times, how he felt tainted and dirty for absorbing the Leviathans and then inviting Lucifer in. He knew he didn't feel worthy of an archangel's love and he wasn't blind to how Cas was frightened that both Winchesters would change their minds at wanting him after he had let the Devil possess him without warning them, even if it was to save their lives.

Dean had never been that great with words; they either came too quickly and got jumbled in his mouth where they didn't make any sense, or they wouldn't come at all and he would be left floundering without anything to say with his defences left wide open. Words had always been Sam's thing, not his.

Touch though; tender kisses and meaningful contact. That was Dean's forte. He might not be able to speak his mind, but he could certainly _show_ it.

So as Cas was having all these troubled thoughts, Dean pressed his lips against the seraph's wing, peppering kisses over it as his hand raked deeply through the soft feathers.

Cas' breath hitched, despite him not having the need to take in oxygen, and Dean smiled against the wing as his hand continued to rub the aching muscle twitching beneath it. There were still some kinks left from Lucifer's torment.

He was surprised however, when he glanced up and his gaze caught oil leaking from beneath a few feathers near a joint in the wing.

He chuckled and placed an affectionate kiss to Cas' lips.

"Eager?" He teased, but when Cas' eyes opened to reveal desperation and need and love, the teasing quickly died in his throat.

"Easy, Angel," murmured Dean as he leaned in for another kiss. "We have all night and I'm not going anywhere." Another stolen kiss. "'M never going anywhere."

So distracted by Dean's heartwarming words, Cas didn't notice the hunter's hand wandering towards his gland and he let out a startled groan as a finger began to gently circle the gland. He was really sensitive tonight.

"Please..." begged Cas and Dean shook his head.

"Not rushing tonight. You're going to be a shaking boneless mess when I'm finished with you and maybe then you'll realise how much you mean to us all."

Dean's nail scraped over the gland and Cas whimpered quietly. He wanted this.

Dean's finger continued to stimulate the gland until the surrounding feathers were dripping with oil and then the human leaned over and pressed his tongue inside the gland.

Cas cried out, clutching frantically at Dean's back and Dean shivered at the reminder of the power thrumming beneath Cas' vessel. To think he was teasing something so intensely strong; a creature that could crush him with a single wave of its hand, yet was begging and groaning for his simple touch was baffling. And maybe a little bit hot.

Okay, _very_ hot.

He lapped at the oil, sucking at the gland before shoving his tongue into it and Cas arched upwards, moaning blissfully in approval.

Then Dean scraped his teeth over it and Cas whined.

"Dean..."

The hunter rushed to silence him with a rough kiss as two fingers slid into the gland and he swallowed Cas' throaty groans hungrily as he tasted the seraph's mouth again.

Maybe he was a little more desperate for Cas than he had originally let on.

A third finger slipped into the gland during his rubbing and Castiel nipped at his bottom lip in a silent plea for more. Dean pressed a little harder.

Then he began to stretch the gland out before pushing his fourth finger in and he didn't give the angel time to think as he picked up the pace until the gland was raw.

The wing began to shake and still, Dean didn't stop, and it was only when Cas' hips accidentally rolled against Dean's through a particularly guttural groan, did Dean realise how aroused Cas was.

He deliberately scraped his nails over the inside of the wrecked gland, and Cas' head rolled back as his back arched and he released a whimper.

Oil was flowing freely from the overworked gland now and Cas' wing was slowly becoming drenched in the slick liquid, so Dean clawed the stuff through his feathers and into the skin, making sure not a single part of the wing was left untouched.

Cas was quivering beneath him.

"More," he begged unabashedly and Dean grinned as he tugged at the feathers, making the angel cry out again.

"Trench coat off," whispered Dean as peppered kisses over Cas' face and just as he was about to slide it off the angel's arms, Cas clicked his fingers and they were both suddenly stark naked.

"You are spending far too much time with Gabriel," huffed Dean, but he wasn't really complaining. There was a naked angel spread beneath him. "What happened to not rushing?"

Cas crushed their lips together in that passionate way Dean had never expected from the angel.

"There's not rushing and then there's _slow_ ," muttered the angel, voice a little shaky. "I lost my patience."

Dean chuckled as he turned their kiss into something more tender.

"We'll just have to fill the time with something else," he commented lightly as his finger brushed the raw gland again, prompting Cas to whine.

Dean paused to gaze at the writhing seraph. He was causing that. He was making this immensely powerful creature turn into a groaning, needy heap and Cas was actually enjoying it. This angel, who had raised him from perdition and had saved him too many times to count, protected him and defended him against all that had wished him harm, even if it put the seraph himself in danger, and had sacrificed himself on so many occasions to make Dean happy and safe, was allowing Dean to touch him. He trusted Dean to take care of him when he had failed so many times before.

"I love you," blurted Dean and Cas cracked an eye open.

"I love you too," he responded easily and Dean felt his heart expand and his throat go dry. He smashed their lips together.

"You're beautiful," whispered Dean hurriedly. "You're gorgeous and smart and brave and strong and I'm honoured I get to see you like this. That I get to touch you and kiss you and hold you. I don't deserve you yet you don't seem to care and you trust me anyway even when I've hurt you so many times. 

"You're an angel," murmured Dean disbelievingly. "A real angel and for some reason you think you don't deserve anything good for yourself and that's not true. I hate it when you think like that, and so do Gabe and Sam, because you're so kind and caring; big-hearted and protective over the things you love and you deserve so much better than what life's handed to you. You deserve so much more than to be stuck on Earth, tied to a couple of damaged hunters who can never give you all you should have and could've had if you'd have just left me in Hell all those years ago."

Castiel actually growled at that before cupping Dean's cheek and pressing their mouths more firmly together until Dean could no longer speak.

"Shut up," hissed Cas and the fierceness was enough to make Dean startle.

They shared a few heated kisses before Cas pulled back.

"I'm not merely _'tied'_ to you, Dean. I've given my whole grace to you. I've given you everything I am and will be, so don't for a second think I wish my life was any different. Don't insult our bonds with twisted words of regret, when I desire no others but the mates I already have."

Cas scowled. "I never expected to be able to experience bonds, much less you, so don't you dare say I should have stayed in Heaven and lived out my existence as their pawn when there is so much for me to experience down here. With you and Sam and Gabriel."

Cas stole another kiss.

"You said I deserve more than what life has handed me... _then show me,_ " he insisted but it came out more like a plea and Dean was quick to comply.

He trailed his lips down Cas' chest and stomach, kissing, licking and nipping at every bit of skin that was available to him as his hand worked at the oily wing.

He worshiped Cas' body, burning promises into the flesh with every kiss, and lightly marking it as his with every nip. 

Cas' groans and shudders were like an addiction and he found he wanted more, so he moved lower and began to tease at the soft skin of Castiel's thighs, nipping and kissing them again. When he licked a long stripe up the inside of one, Cas moaned and wrapped the oily wing around Dean's body, embracing him with his scent and Dean didn't realise how aroused that one action would make him.

His angel was marking him, proving who he belonged to and Dean had never thought being owned by someone, much less an angel, would be a good thing, but he couldn't help but arch into the wing, growing hotter when the oil seeped into his skin.

Cas watched the display with a feral gaze and Dean hadn't realised how erotic angels could be when they had lust and possessiveness glinting in their eyes.

Without breaking eye contact, Dean move a little higher up the inside of Cas' thigh and nipped hard at it, and he was rewarded with an approving growl and Cas' wing tightening around his back, pressing more oil into his skin.

When Dean wrapped his lips around one of Cas' more... sensitive parts, the angel's low moan as his head fell back made Dean wonder why he hadn't ignored his reservations about being with another male sooner. 

He was still learning what made his mates feel good and what didn't, but he had to admit, freaking out over the possibility of loving someone with the same genital parts seemed shallow now. He didn't care what skin he got to touch, nor what it looked like and where it was; as long as it got him reactions like the one Cas was granting him, he would do anything. 

It wasn't a question of whether he was gay, bisexual, straight or whatever other sexuality tried to label him, it was just a question of whether he pleased his mates and how loud he could make them scream.

Cas' deep rumble alerted him to the fact he was probably projecting some of his thoughts across the bond and he smirked cheekily as he continued to tease at Cas' arousal.

He didn't get away with it for too long though, because Cas was growing restless without anything to occupy his own mouth and, with inhuman strength that turned Dean on quite a bit more than it probably should have, yanked Dean's body flush with his until their lips connected again.

Cas' hand wandered down his back and was about to grip his rump when Dean caught it and pinned both arms above his head.

"Ah-ah," he murmured. "Tonight's about you, remember?"

"Dean-" 

The hunter rolled his hips sharply in reprimand and Cas swallowed thickly, derailing his train of thought.

Dean plunged three fingers straight into the gland of the wing that had gone untouched and the angel howled as he mercilessly stretched it out, rubbing it harshly before slipping his fourth finger into it.

Once again, he made sure the gland was raw and spent, and the angel himself panting and whimpering before finally massaging the liquid into the trembling wing.

Then, just as Castiel was beginning to relax, Dean rolled his hips in a brief warning, before claiming the angel fully.

The free wing tightened around Dean as Cas' arms latched around him.

The angel buried his face into Dean's neck as the hunter took him, manipulating his wing as he did so, and Cas let out a little needy sob as Dean claimed him slow and deep, making every sensation last as the human poured his love and awe and gratefulness into every defence-shattering thrust.

"You're not tainted," Dean murmured as he pressed his lips to the angel's temple, and Cas couldn't remember starting to cry, but there were definite damp patches on Dean's neck.

"You're not dirty," Dean continued as he held Cas steady, his other arm sliding around Cas' body so the wing he had been massaging could curl around the human's back.

"I care," Dean whispered. "I care when you're happy and when you're not. When you need to be alone and when you need the opposite. When you're scared or confused; _I care._ "

Cas realised Dean was referring to every doubt he'd ever had about being worthless, about being rejected by Heaven, by his brethren. All the mistakes he'd made throughout his existence and all the people he'd hurt or killed had been projected through the bonds at different times and now Dean wanted to soothe his fears and worries.

After so long dancing around one another and pretending they were fine, Cas realised they didn't have to anymore. They could seek one another out when times got hard and they could comfort one another when they needed it and Cas had never realised just how much he'd needed it until he was actually given that support. 

"I'm sorry," murmured Dean softly. "For all the times I hurt you and deceived you; the times I betrayed your trust. I'm sorry for saying no one cares if you're broken, because I didn't mean it. I care. 

"I'm sorry for threatening you and upsetting you, for calling you so many things you aren't and don't deserve. Because I love you, Cas. I love you so much it hurts to see you in distress and I just want you to be happy and to know you can come to me whenever you need to, even if there's probably not a lot I can do to help. I'll try though... I'd do anything for you, Cas."

Cas was quivering beneath Dean as the hunter's rhythm remained strong and steady. He pressed his lips to Dean's jaw, affectionate and grateful as his grip tightened around his human.

"You're wrong," he whispered. "You help me more than you know. You take care of me, you accepted me as your family when I'd been rejected by mine and you've saved my life more times than I can count. Now you're giving me more; you're giving me your heart and soul. Your trust for me is _breathtaking_ , especially considering all the times I've hurt and betrayed you."

"Fine. We're both screw ups," chuckled Dean as he tugged Cas a little tighter to him and the angel smiled with him. "But let's be screw ups together," murmured Dean as he captured his angel's lips sweetly.

Cas huffed out an amused laugh before wrapping his legs around Dean's waist, urging him to pick up the pace a little. 

Dean did, and after a few minutes, Cas' wings flexed in pleasure as his eyes glowed blue and he let out a blissful cry, with Dean quickly tumbling over the edge soon after the erotic display.

The angel snuggled into Dean when they relaxed into the mattress, tucking his head under the hunter's chin as he wrapped his wings around him. Dean smiled and tugged the angel closer as he curled his arms around him protectively, still stunned that he was allowed to hold Cas like this.

Deep love and affection drifted easily through their bond and the pair found their doubts and concerns fading away, even if only for the moment as they basked in the sensations of being so close to one another.

Dean chuckled at Cas' fluffy wings, the feathers puffed out at different angles as a testament to how happy he was, and he gently ran his fingers through a few, smiling when Cas cuddled closer, resting his head on Dean's chest.

After a few minutes of listening to one another's breathing (even if Cas had only put it on for the sake of the moment) and relishing one another's body heat, Cas hummed contentedly before draping himself over Dean as he claimed his human's lips in a lazy kiss.

"Ready for round two?" He asked innocently.

Dean smirked and grabbed a wing.

 

* * *

 

Another three months passed. Amara was still a threat looming over the Universe and the Winchesters' regular hunts still continued despite all the changes Team Free Will had been through, including the addition of a fatal fog that not only killed people, but could take over their minds and make them aggressive or suicidal.

Sam and Dean had been caught in it as they tried to rescue who they could from a small town. However, the fog infected most people before Cas and Gabe were able to rescue their beloved hunters and the few people Sam and Dean had managed to save. Nobody seemed to care how Cas and Gabe saved them from the fog, only that they had, so the angel thing seemed to go unnoticed.

Lucifer had also returned in Nick's body.

And he wanted to help.

Granted, he'd avoided Team Free Will during this time, but anyone who was willing to go head-to-head with the Darkness with only the Horn of Joshua as their weapon obviously cared about the Earth to some degree.

It was a shame Amara had captured Lucifer and had begun to torture him as an attempt at gaining God's attention.

Team Free Will weren't sure who was on whose side anymore and they were half convinced they were supposed to rescue Lucifer considering he had tried to destroy Amara to spare the Earth. 

The other half of them were saying that was a very Bad Idea after all Lucifer had put them through.

Still, Lucifer had been the one to challenge Amara, not Crowley or Rowena, who had vanished the second the Darkness took off with the archangel. Like mother like son.

Gabriel and Castiel had promised to stay at the Bunker like the Winchesters had asked, but when the whole showdown had taken place, and Lucifer had appeared to steal the Horn and destroy Amara, both angels had been revving to go and protect their mates from the new threat. However Sam and Dean had shoved warning after warning down their bonds; filling them with fear and panic for their angels' safety in case something went wrong. 

Cas and Gabe against Amara and Lucifer did not bode well.

So their angels had stayed put, hidden and protected by the warding of the Bunker even if they had paced around like caged animals the whole time as they scrutinised every little twitch of the bonds for signs of danger.

Now, with Lucifer being tortured by Amara, Team Free Will were beginning to wonder if they would ever have a chance at stopping the destruction of the Universe by the immensely powerful Darkness.

It made their time together as a flock all the more important.

It was a time to be cherished, because one day it could end. And that day could come a lot sooner than they'd feared.

Sam pressed gentle kisses to the back of Gabriel's neck as Dean and Cas rolled their eyes at the archangel's chatter.

"Don't you think it should be _'Team Free Love'_ , now though?" The archangel argued, easily leaning into the younger hunter whilst perching on his lap.

Dean scrunched up his nose.

"Are you kidding? It makes us sound like a bunch of hippies."

"Right, and _'Team Free Will'_ doesn't sound like a Human Rights slogan," snorted Gabe.

"We don't even have a name," huffed Sam as he tightened his grip around Gabriel's stomach. "We're not exactly a business."

Gabriel looked to be getting really into the discussion.

"Not yet, but think about it: _Team Free Love; Saving people, hunting things. The family business._ It could be our catchphrase."

Castiel shook his head before snuggling into Dean's side and letting his mates' chatter wash over him as the TV provided a quiet background noise. This was how life was supposed to be. Surrounded by family in a safe place; content and at ease for the moment.

Dean automatically wrapped an arm around him.

"What the-? No; no stupid catchphrases. We're not part of some ridiculous reality TV show."

"But you were at one point," winked Gabriel as he unwrapped a packet of Lovehearts that definitely hadn't been there when they'd first started talking. He popped one in Sam's mouth before taking one for himself.

"Don't remind me," shuddered Dean, remembering the cheesy cop show he'd had to act out.

"At least you didn't get morphed into a car, or get forced into a herpes commercial," grumbled Sam.

"Or whacked in the nuts by a ball on a stick during a Japanese game show," piped up Gabe cheerfully, before squeezing Sam's hand apologetically and offering him another sweet.

The younger human begrudgingly took the peace offering. Just because Gabe was sorry now, didn't mean he would never prank them again; it just affected the types of prank he pulled.

Still, none of Gabriel's mates would have him any other way.

"We stick with _'Team Free Will'_ ," snorted Dean as he stroked a thumb over Cas' stomach.

Gabriel pouted. "You're no fun. Cassie, make your mate change our name."

Cas glanced at him, unimpressed. "He's your mate too."

"Yeah, but he actually listens to you."

"That's because I don't intentionally set out to irritate him."

Dean smirked and wrapped his second arm around the seraph, making a show of nuzzling his neck until Gabriel made a disgusted sound and slumped back into Sam's chest.

"If it's any consolation, I prefer _'Team Free Love'_ ," chuckled Sam quietly as he whispered into Gabe's ear and the archangel's face lit up with delight.

"Sammy's on my side!"

Dean rolled his eyes. "Yeah, well, Cas is on mine, so the name stays."

Cas paused. "Actually..."

Dean groaned as Gabriel fist-pumped and made grabby hands at the younger angel.

"Come join the awesome couch," he grinned and Cas snuggled further into Dean.

"I'm quite comfortable here, thank you."

A brief pout crossed Gabriel's features before he was grinning triumphantly at Dean.

" _'Team Free Love'_ , it is then," sighed Dean, but to be honest, with an angel tucked into his side and his brother and other mate cuddling on the adjacent couch, he didn't sound too bothered.

Dean's bond with Gabriel suddenly opened up and playfulness and fond affection trailed through it and embraced his soul. Dean allowed himself a smile as he caressed Gabriel's grace with a tendril of his soul. The archangel seemed pleased by the connection and he continued to let emotion flow between the bond.

A few minutes passed where they just enjoyed being in one another's company then Gabriel's bonds with all three of his mates flooded with warmth and protectiveness.

"I'm so proud of you three," he admitted softly and the others raised their eyebrows at him. "I'm proud of all you've achieved and all you've saved despite when times got difficult, sometimes seemingly impossible. I'm proud of the way you overcome every challenge in your path. I'm so lucky to call you my mates."

Cas tilted his head concernedly.

"What's brought this on, brother?"

Sam's grip tightened around the archangel's middle. 

"Gabe?" He asked quietly, and Gabriel closed his eyes as he reached out through the bonds. His grace was met by three tendrils of worry.

"...I don't know how long we've got. I thought we could beat her, and maybe we can, but I just... If we can't, I don't know how long I'll get to keep you. I don't know how many moments we'll have like this, where all of us are together. I wanted you to know how proud I am of you. How honoured I am to have you as my family, as my flock. I just... I wish we had more time together. I wish I had more time to learn about you..." Gabriel's voice was solemn, resigned and all their impending fates suddenly became very real.

Amara had captured Lucifer and was torturing him; a Hand of God hadn't so much as scratched her. The full might of Heaven had barely weakened her. What could have a hope of actually _defeating_ her?

Sam tugged Gabriel closer as Cas and Dean pressed into one another.

They had spent so long trying to get to this point and now it seemed it wouldn't matter and they were all going to die anyway if Amara got her way. Even Dean, who still held a bond with her yet could no longer feel her.

"I don't want to lose this," Sam confessed, voice barely above a whisper, and Gabriel placed his hand over the hunter's.

"You're not one your own, little one." The pet name was enough to bring tiny tears to Sam's eyes and he buried his face in Gabriel's neck as he mourned all he could lose.

"There's got to be some way of stopping her," muttered Cas, hating seeing his mates so upset. That wasn't right; they were supposed to be happy. They weren't allowed to be hurt; not anymore, not now they were all there to support one another.

"It's been done before, so it must be possible," he frowned, wracking his brain for a way to keep his flock. They couldn't end like this.

Dean closed his eyes as he rested his forehead against Cas' raven hair.

"We'll find a way," he murmured determinedly. He wasn't giving this up, not now; not when it had taken so long for him to understand and realise what he wanted. "We always do... we have to."

A heavy silence fell over the room as each man was lost in his respective musings and concerns. It was deafening in its emptiness and it seemed to be a harsh reminder of what was to come if they failed.

"How?" Whispered Gabriel eventually, voice barely a desperate whimper and each member of Team Free Love held one another a little closer.

Suddenly, all the lights in the Bunker flickered once before brightening again, and immediately Sam and Dean's hunter instincts kicked in as they reached for their closest weapons. Cas and Gabe quickly dropped their blades. The flicker may have been brief, but with the monsters they were all used to dealing with, they wouldn't be so naive as to just dismiss it as a glitch in the power grid.

Then, to everyone's shock, the amulet Dean wore around his neck began to glow slightly, shining brighter and brighter until it was almost blinding.

Slowly, disbelievingly, the four turned around to face the archway leading into the kitchen. A very familiar man with a scruffy beard and an old jacket stood quietly, watching them with an impossibly old, but fond gaze.

"We should probably talk," he said.

Gabe's wings began to tremble as Cas' eyes blew wide. Dean and Sam slowly put away their weapons as distrust mixed with intense hope filled their hearts.

Both angels gulped and shakily uttered the one word that would alter the course of the Universe's and their impending future as a family, as a flock, and as mates, forever.

"... _Dad?_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Fin**
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> So that's the end, guys! I really hope you all enjoyed the ride! This was originally supposed to be all from Gabriel's point of view and it was only supposed to be 10K to 20K words, with approx. 4/5 chapters. As you can see, that didn't quite happen! I may add a few one-shots to this verse, but I'm not entirely sure yet. I've got other things I want to work on (including University stuff!) so it depends whether I get time.
> 
> Still, it was a joy to write and I'm really grateful for all the comments you guys have sent me! Thanks again and see you in the next one, maybe?

**Author's Note:**

> There is so much PWP written for these guys as a group, so I thought I'd rectify that with a little bit of plot.
> 
> Still, I can't bring myself to do Wincest so if you're looking for porn between those two then you've come to the wrong place... although there will be lots of fluffy moments for our favourite brothers.
> 
> Criticism and improvements welcome.


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